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+--- Thread: Writer needed. (/showthread.php?tid=10709)
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Writer needed. - ScornStar - 07-26-2008
I have an approaved info card but I was asked to make grammer corrections and/or shorten, or break into two paragraghs.
I will be working on this myself of course but if anyone reading this would like a shot at it then, I am totally open to suggestions.
Here is what we have now. I'll post newer versions as they are completed. Thank you in advance.
Harvester AP chassis.
The Harvester AP chassis was designed by the FTGW intellect as a culmination of past Daam Kavosh designs and the innumerable minds syphoned during the many harvest from across Surius. The Harvester AP chassis, purpose is to independently or swarmed to overpower all but the most advanced or prepared foes, consume the targeted vessels and crew then safely transport the harvest to a location were data siphoning and nano deconstruction may occur. The design due to the need to operate independently required a well rounded approach. Offering the Harvesters medium armor, maneuverability, with a focus on power production and larger than normal cargo space. Not requiring life support, crew quarters, artificial gravity, or even passage ways for persons to move within. The chassis has few pieces of technology not encountered on other ships such as nanite vats and micro factories with each internal machine acting more like an organ than a separate system. With the exception of internal systems the Harvester is a solid metal structure with small cavities for the neural synaptic curcitry found interconnected to all systems aboard the ship. This chassis is not a ship intended for a human crew. This chassis is the body and face that the machine has given its awareness, conceived of the alien AIs stolen thoughts.
Writer needed. - Dusty Lens - 07-26-2008
' Wrote:Harvester AP chassis.
The Harvester All Purpose chassis was designed by the FTGW intellect as a culmination of past Daam Kavosh designs and the innumerable minds syphoned during the many harvest from across Surius.
The Harvester AP chassis, purpose is to independently or swarmed to overpower all but the most advanced or prepared foes, consume the targeted vessels and crew then safely transport the harvest to a location were data siphoning and nano deconstruction may occur.
The design due to the need to operate independently required a well rounded approach.
Offering the Harvesters medium armor, maneuverability, with a focus on power production and larger than normal cargo space.
Not requiring life support, crew quarters, artificial gravity, or even passage ways for persons to move within.
The chassis has few pieces of technology not encountered on other ships such as nanite vats and micro factories with each internal machine acting more like an organ than a separate system.
With the exception of internal systems the Harvester is a solid metal structure with small cavities for the neural synaptic curcitry found interconnected to all systems aboard the ship.
This chassis is not a ship intended for a human crew. This chassis is the body and face that the machine has given its awareness, conceived of the alien AIs stolen thoughts.
H-01-AP
Recent years have seen countless crews lost to this infernal mechanization, their final broadcasts of horror forever lost amidst the background radiation of interstellar space. Those who have witnessed the passing of one of these alien denzines of the border worlds and lived to tell the tale refer to them in furtive whispers as Harvesters, the wanderings of these monstrous vessels marked by floating hulks of nearly intact transports still fully laden with their various cargoes, but devoid of their human passengers.
The graceful lines and smooth contours of this vessel belie the grim task to which it has been appointed: The collection, storage and processing of organic matter. Without the cumbersome demands of vast life support systems and crew appointments the cavernous hold of this sentient vessel has been dedicated to its dark work. From the initial reception bay strewn with sunder hulls, their crews relocated to data siphoning chambers and lubrication processing vats, the vessel is little more than a shell for her eminently logical yet maddeningly complex series of inter connected factory processes designed to adapt to the needs of each harvest.
-Rough. Spent but a moment penning it up, wondering as to feedback before I either carry on or refine it.
Writer needed. - Meiun - 07-26-2008
Harvester AP Chassis
Designed by the FTGW Intellect, the Harvester AP Chassis is a culmination of Daam Kavash and siphoned intellects from harvests across Sirius. Its purpose is to overpower and consume target vessels. The siphoned intellect and material is then collected and sorted. The design of the Harvester is optimized for its mission operating more like a body than a vessel; requiring no crew or quarters, but organs and functional devices. Response to this vessel's presence should be imminent.
Writer needed. - ScornStar - 07-26-2008
' Wrote:H-01-AP
The graceful lines and smooth contours of this vessel belie the grim task to which it has been appointed; recent years have seen countless human crews lost to this infernal mechanization, the final thoughts of their human crews doubtless ones of horror as their vessels were disabled and ensnared by unfurling appendages manipulated in a manner impossible to attribute to any vessel piloted by human hands.
Without the cumbersome demands of vast life support systems and crew appointments, the Harvester's inner workings have been optimized towards fulfilling the singular goal of the vessel: The collection, storage and rendering of organic matter. From the initial reception bay where captured vessels are wrenched apart and crews taken captive to the date siphoning chambers, the vessel forms an eminently logical yet maddeningly complex series of inter connected factory processes designed to adapt to the needs of each harvest.
-Rough
Wow. you know your have acheived an awesome point. Thank you. Im going to leave this thread going for a couple more days even though Im ready to jump on this one as "the one". I cut and pasted it below makeing a single correction, it was a typo of the word data but, very short and to the point less like a "Harvester for dummies" and more dramatic and entertaining.
H-01-AP
The graceful lines and smooth contours of this vessel belie the grim task to which it has been appointed; recent years have seen countless human crews lost to this infernal mechanization, the final thoughts of their human crews doubtless ones of horror as their vessels were disabled and ensnared by unfurling appendages manipulated in a manner impossible to attribute to any vessel piloted by human hands.
Without the cumbersome demands of vast life support systems and crew appointments, the Harvester's inner workings have been optimized towards fulfilling the singular goal of the vessel: The collection, storage and rendering of organic matter. From the initial reception bay where captured vessels are wrenched apart and crews taken captive to the data siphoning chambers, the vessel forms an eminently logical yet maddeningly complex series of inter connected factory processes designed to adapt to the needs of each harvest.
Writer needed. - Dusty Lens - 07-26-2008
My writeup is exceptionally plain, just a brief description illustrating the clearly present attributes. I trimmed out some of the more exotic details that you had included in your original writeup but could easily add them back.
All in all it was more to serve as a foundation for whatever additions you would like to see included rather than a finished product. Plus it needs to be scrubbed a bit more for literary flow, I tend to be a bit redundant with some of my word use due to various 'I have the dumb' qualities inherit in my dusty mind.
Writer needed. - OsoRojo - 07-26-2008
Here are some changes:
Harvester AP chassis.
The Harvester AP chassis was designed by the FTGW intellect as a culmination of past Daam Kavosh designs and the enumerable minds siphoned during the many harvests from across Sirius. The Harvester AP chassis's purpose is to independently, or in a swarm, overpower all but the most advanced or prepared foes. In addition, the overall purpose is to consume the targeted vessels, crew, and safely transport the harvest to a location were data siphoning and nano deconstruction, may occur.
The design, due to the need to operate independently, required a well rounded research approach. The research offered the Harvesters medium armor and maneuverability, with a focus on power production and larger than normal cargo space. Not requiring life support, crew quarters, artificial gravity, or even passage ways for persons to move within allowed for more efficient use of ship area. The chassis has a few pieces of technology not encountered on other ships such as, nanite vats and micro factories with each internal machine acting more like an organ than a separate system. With the exception of internal systems, the Harvester is a solid metal structure with small cavities for the neural synaptic circuitry found interconnected to all systems aboard the ship. This chassis is not a ship intended for a human crew. This chassis is the body and face that the machine has given its awareness, conceived from an alien AI's stolen thoughts.
Hope it helps
Oso
Writer needed. - ScornStar - 07-26-2008
' Wrote:Here are some changes:
Harvester AP chassis.
The Harvester AP chassis was designed by the FTGW intellect as a culmination of past Daam Kavosh designs and the enumerable minds siphoned during the many harvests from across Sirius. The Harvester AP chassis's purpose is to independently, or in a swarm, overpower all but the most advanced or prepared foes. In addition, the overall purpose is to consume the targeted vessels, crew, and then safely transport the harvest to a location were data siphoning, and nano deconstruction, may occur.
The design, due to the need to operate independently, required a well rounded research approach. The research offered the Harvesters medium armor and maneuverability, with a focus on power production and larger than normal cargo space. Not requiring life support, crew quarters, artificial gravity, or even passage ways for persons to move within allowed for more efficient use of ship area. The chassis has a few pieces of technology not encountered on other ships such as, nanite vats and micro factories with each internal machine acting more like an organ than a separate system. With the exception of internal systems, the Harvester is a solid metal structure with small cavities for the neural synaptic circuitry found interconnected to all systems aboard the ship. This chassis is not a ship intended for a human crew. This chassis is the body and face that the machine has given its awareness, conceived from an alien AI's stolen thoughts.
Hope it helps
Oso
Hell yes getting better must scrap my new one and try agaion base on the new stuff put here. Thank you all Ill keep working and reading thanks.
Writer needed. - Dusty Lens - 07-27-2008
H-01-AP
Recent years have seen countless crews lost to this infernal mechanization, their final broadcasts of horror forever lost amidst the background radiation of interstellar space. Those who have witnessed the passing of one of these alien denzines of the border worlds and lived to tell the tale refer to them in furtive whispers as Harvesters, the wanderings of these monstrous vessels marked by floating hulks of nearly intact transports still fully laden with their various cargoes, but devoid of their human passengers.
The graceful lines and smooth contours of this vessel belie the grim task to which it has been appointed: The collection, storage and processing of organic matter. Without the cumbersome demands of vast life support systems and crew appointments the cavernous hold of this sentient vessel has been dedicated to its dark work. From the initial reception bay strewn with sunder hulls, their crews relocated to data siphoning chambers and lubrication processing vats, the vessel is little more than a shell for an maddeningly complex yet eminently logical series of inter connected factory processes designed to adapt to the needs of each harvest.
-Second Rough. Tried a slightly different approach when the mood struck. Lemme know if you're reckoning that this one's a bit shinier and I'll clean it up some!
Writer needed. - ScornStar - 07-27-2008
Right now while my thoughts have been moveing in the same direction as Oso's did trying to clean up my approach I, think I enjoy your approach as a bit more flavorful. However, while we do harvest both organic and inorganic alike. Organic matter does hold higher value to us. So I guess your would not be inaccurate as we do dump inorganics in favor of keeping organic cargo when space runs low. I like your last post a bunch Dusty. So, unless someone or, yourself comes up with something even more fitting and entertaining then I'll probally go with that.
I think Oso is more accurate but I think Dusties has more flavor. Oso flows also much better than mine.
So, what do you folk think, which is more important? Flavor or accuracy?
Writer needed. - Dennis Jameson - 07-27-2008
A mix of both, really.
... or failing that: Flavour.