I’ll start writing about this… feeling that I have. It’s greatness… I feel very important. It’s like something is calling me, like I have a new purpose in life, like… I don’t know, I think there’s a new presence around or maybe it’s old and only now it lets me see it.

It all started weeks ago when a group of gaians were discussing about an expedition to Gaia’s surface. Normaly I’d disagree… such intrusions may only harm Her but this one time, something pushed me and I enlisted for this trip. Flora is organizing it… maybe it’s my affection for her that decided for me or maybe it’s much more than that.

I hope to find answers on the planet but I don’t know what questions to ask. I’m like a child lost in a strange and big world. Wait… if I’m writing this… I’ll write the questions. I know them, they’re so many, they’re flooding my mind!

What is Gaia? What are the humans? Did Gaia create life? Did She create us? Did She create the Nomads? What about the Daam K’Vosh? Are they eternal? Did She end them? Why? If she has power over life and death, why isn’t she ending all our conflicts? Is our civilisation supposed to destroy itself? Why are we protecting Her then?

Now I remember this meeting with a Cryer scientist. He had this theory… Gaians are Gaia’s eyes, the Watchers. The Nomads are Gaia’s fists, the Guardians. If that’d be true, it means Gaia created us and the Nomads… but why are we fighting each other? Maybe it’s all part of a bigger picture. Maybe my human mind can not understand the grandeur of this. Maybe... maybe there's a plan.

One thing is certain. I must go to Gaia. I must contact Flora… yes, I need my ships. The new Claymore might be my best option.

I've met one of the Nomads. It was flooding my mind with joyful thoughts. Flora was there too. She doesn't believe my theory. She says they're dangerous and they'd destroy Gaia if given the chance.

After that encounter, I don't think that. They're not hostile... they want what's best for us. One of the visions was about a green world, untouched by man or by them. Gaia maybe? I really need to get there. Flora's expedition takes ages to organize. I think I'll go alone. If the visions are true, Gaia won't harm me.

Maybe she'll just send the Guardians to protect my path. They've been watching us for all these years. protecting us from the shadows, no doubt. But why reveal to me now? And those visions of the Goddess... it must be because she sent them, yes.

I need a ship, any ship. I must go right now. I won't wait anymore. I only have the Marauder here. It's enough... I won't stay too long. I don't need many supplies.

I have been delayed. The alarms sounded right when I was going to leave the base. Damned Armed Forces and their patrols found and attacked one of our transports. Flora and I had to go rescue it.

The fight was short. The transport lost its shields very fast and was blown up by the BAF. Even after they announced the surrender. We torched them for that. It felt good. The Guardians were there too, standing by. They would have probably engaged if we were in danger. This time they vanished before I could approach. They're breaking contact... it's because I'm not leaving. I must go. I can't wait any longer. My ship was damaged. One more day for repairs and then I'll go, no matter what.

Flora got a little mad at me. I don't know where she went after that. I'll find her when I'm coming back. I don't have time for her... She's been a good friend but she won't stay in my way.

Only one day, Goddess, and I'll come to you...

What was I thinking? Flora was right... they've been controlling me all this time. I was so stupid, so weak and now, now I'm lost. They'll get to me. They shot me down but I saw them landing here too. They're looking for me. Fraking Nomads! And Gaia is so messed up. If it's not a huge lizard, there's a huge cat. If it's not that, then it's some kind of bug. Everything is trying to kill me.

I just found this small cave. They can't see my fire and I can keep animals at bay. My transmitter got hit by them, My location is unknown. The buoy isn't working. I'm so fraking lost. Oh God, Flora, you were right all this time.

If anyone will read this, know that my name is Mildra Marte and I've crashed on Planet Gaia after being engaged by the Nomads. They've been messing with my head for a few months, making me want to come to Gaia alone. I have no idea what they'll gain by killing one human, especially one unimportant human as I am. If this is my last message, let it be a warning. The Nomads are evil.

It's been almost two months since I last wrote here. I've managed hide from the Nomads and after a while they gave up. Since then, my only concern was to stay alive. Travel by day, hide during the night.

Lucky me, I spotted a ship in the air and it looked like it was going to land somewhere. I tried to find the landing spot and, big surprise! It's a small spaceport belonging to a gallic OS&C like company.

I decided to get to the ship and leave those suckers there but the guards were armed with some serious firepower so I had to be as stealthy as possible. And it worked. When they realized what happened I was already powering up the engines. And now I'm free and they are dinner. I'm heading back to Manchester. Hopefully, I'll be able to change the IFF till I get there. I don't want to be shot on sight by everyone and their bretonian dogs.

Ah, everything seems changed out here. Sierra, Allan, Evans and even Flora are no longer with the Gaians. It appears that the Watchers are gone... What the frak has happened?

I searched the neural-net for some info and... hah, it appears that Flora is dead. She was caught and sentenced to death for terrorism during times of war. At least I now know her real name: Kate McKinley.

The good news is that all my ships are still here. Some minor faction was going to use the Wildcat but I stopped them and now she's back in my hands. A secondary gaian movement seems to have emerged. It's called The Gaian Guard. I'm going to see what those guys are all about and decide later if I should stay with them or go on on my own.

First order of business, get my navmaps up to date. Things changed in space as much as in politics, I guess.

The situation is not -that- bad. Flor... I mean Kate is not dead yet. I've met her yesterday when I was getting used with my ships again. She managed to escape prison somehow aaaaand left the gaians after that so it's a lose-lose situation for the organization. But she's alive. I hope I'll get to talk to her more. She's the only one I trust to put me up to speed with the news. She's useful... for now.

Also, today, I destroyed my first ship after the comeback. A Planetform transport filled with uncut diamonds just waiting to get crushed out there, in the Omegas. Seeing that ship exploding... it didn't even fight back. I hope it wasn't controlled by some sort of robot. I'd hate to feel this good and not have some human victims to brag about. Anyway, I have some guncam images and some cargo scan readings and I want to put here.

Been a while since I last wrote here. I've been taking a break, visiting the Omegas. They're nice, if you don't mind high radiation levels.

Today, I saw this semi-encrypted transmission on the NeuralNet. Apparently some crazy chick captured three Armed Forces pilots and she wants to sell them to the highest bidder. Unfortunately for her, one of those BMF employees hacked the transmission and poured his filthy words in that channel. He was followed by someone from BAF. They were requesting that their pilots would not be harmed and that they would be delivered to a battleship, blah blah blaaaaah... boring.

So I decided to make that channel more... entertaining. I'll be offering money to that chick if she shows me how she tortures those bastards. It's a little game... for every painful experience they suffer, she gets a sum of money. The more they suffer, the more money she gets. The trick is she has to keep them alive as long as possible if she wants more money.

If she agrees with my offer, I'll open the channel to public eyes... so that others can have fun too.

It's been a while and that girl hasn't replied. She's probably dead, or she lost her prisoners and doesn't want to tell us because she'd make a fool of herself.

Anyway, something odd happened today. While I was... flying around in Manchester, I was intercepted by a BAF wing. They started following me but were unable to catch me and I reached Holmfirth in good order. They said it was the first time they saw the base, having no idea it was there. This can't be right. We've had BAF at our doors in the past. I guess their chain of command is so affected by the war that they don't share all their vital intel with all their pilots.

But that wasn't even the most odd part of this encounter. What puzzled me was their inaction. I was a lone target... easy for the 3 of them, despite having covering fire from Holmfirth. Instead, one of them asked me to date him. I'll admit that I tried to talk my way out of that puzzling interaction by seducing one of them but... it was too easy.

It might be a trap. I'll see what happens. I'll meet him on Barrier Gate. he won't try anything there. If he does, station security will have his ass and so will I. No... if he wants to do anything he'll do it when we part ways. He might set an ambush. That's why I'll take him to a place where he can't ambush me but I can hurt him. He's going to die...

The usual daily patrol took me to New London. There I encountered some familiar names: Sarah McKinley, Flora's mother and commander Ash Porkfield. While I was trying to have a little chat with the two, Porkfield fell asleep and Sarah started harrassing a poor IMG pilot that was heading towards the Taus to wife and kids.

I couldn't remain indifferent so I engaged. The IMG pilot engaged in self defense aswell. Before I knew it, the place turned into a real battlefield enemies and allies joining the battle one after the other. My side had only two casualties. But the others... they lost a lot of ships, including a gunboat. We also damaged a carrier and a Bottlenose. What can I say except that it was a well deserved victory over the harmful regime. McKinley got away... for now.

As for that loverboy... he's still waiting for me at Barrier Gate. I'll head there tomorrow and finish him.