To: Major G. Hoest, Red Hessian Army

Guten abend sehr geehrter Herr Hoerst,

With all due respect, good sir, and with no offense intended: What the hell is up with your freakin' archives?

I thought you bunch were good at keeping your paperwork in check, and what blend of warm welcome I get after I drop by Vogtland to say hallo after a long while? That damn dockmaster acts as if it's my first time on a Hessian base and insists that there are no records of me in your archives. We had an agreement, you and I, remember? Let's not forget who saved who's precious behind back in the day, and this certainly is no way to treat an old friend, my good man.

Long story short, the damn radiation in Omicrons had chewed through my guns, so I was going for a fresh set of Natters to go mess with them Kanzler lapdogs for the sake of nostalgia and all that. Next thing I know, I've got a good half a dozen pistols pointed at me, bein' accused of "attempting to steal Hessian tech" and whatnot. For the time being the situation's under control, and I get it if your newer bunch have not a single clue who the hell I am, but when I tell them to check their files and they say there's "keine aufzeichnungen" of me anywhere, that's a problem, and sure not the treatment I should be getting, all things considered.

Now I know you're a busy man and always have a whole lot on your plate, but as I said, this is no way to treat an old friend. So mind fixing them damn records already?

Dankeschön und schönen Tag.