Lawl's Syndrome
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Lawl's Syndrome, also referred to as Space Madness, The Lol Virus, Noob Effect, The Dweedlez, and "STFU", is a medical condition becoming increasingly common around Sirius today. It's origins are not entirely understood, but it's effects on pilots are often apparent.
Lawl's Syndrome has a number of mental and physical effects on people and some Nomads, with common symptoms including strange language, disconnected perception and speech, and often delusions and disconnection.
While medical research is constantly improving, it is often left to local authorities and the ADMINS to respond to cases of this strain.
Symptoms
The Syndrome usually affects people Differently, though a number of common symptoms have been identified. They include:
- Strange, often Disjoined speech interspersed with regular conversation. Including phrases like 'lol', 'rofl', 'wtf', 'pwn', ':)', and others.
- Apparent delusions and disconnection from reality. e.g. Considering the world to be a game to kill people in.
- Belief in Re-incarnation
- Delusions of Grandeur or one's 'l33tne55'
- Sexual Desire to acquire the largest, most powerful warship possible, and disregard for the consent or government and faction regulations regarding them.
People infected with Lawl's Syndrome are commonly referred to as 'Lolwutters', a derogatory term which is considered by some to be Sexist.
It is believed by some that the Lawl Virus is contagious. This is partially true, though in a similar manner to Chicken Pox. After being cured once, one is usually immune for life. The Majority of people however are immune from birth. Populations with the highest Lawl Virus infection rate are Outcasts, Corsairs, and Liberty. Those with the lowest are Bretonia (does not apply to Dublin system) and Kusari.
The Order And Bounty Hunters Guild Core are also infamous for the rampant infestations of Lawl's Syndrome amongst their pilots. This has been attributed to the extended periods of time they spend out in the Omicrons near Nomads. One might think that it is paradoxical that Liberty has a large percentage of its population infected - but if one takes Alaska and the Liberty Navy's and LSF's operations within that system, and perhaps into further systems, into consideration, it is perhaps easy to construct a link between the Nomads and the Edge and the amount of Lawl's Syndrome within Liberty.
Causes
Nobody knows for sure the cause of Lawl's Syndrome. A number of theories have been purposed.
Cryer Pharmaceuticals spokesmeat have stated that Lawl's syndrome is most likely caused by a recessive gene which is a relatively recent mutation of the human genome, having first emerged during the early 'information age' of the 20th/21st centuries B.S., coinciding with the earliest Computer Networking technology.
Scientists at a Cambridge Research Institute think tank however, believe that Lawl's syndrome is actually a neurological disorder caused by first-time spaceflight.
A study by Renzu Corporation has stated that it may be due to electromagnetic interference with the brain caused by either space-ship or docking ring first-time usage, pointing a finger at the design of Ageira's popular Starflier line of ships. Ageira has declined to comment.
Yet another, radical theory is that Lawl's syndrome is actually caused by microscopic, semi-intelligent Alien Organisms which, like Nomads, attempt to use humans as a host to survive, and cause these odd brain patterns. However, these Organisms cannot survive inside humans forever, and die off at different rates depending on the individual. No evidence can be provided to support this.
Aside from these theories, the usual suspects are:
- Nomads
- Cardamine
- Food Poisoning
- Drunkenness
- Using the Neural Net too much
- The Consortium
- Silver Poisoning
- Mutated Scurvy
- Zelot
Cures
The Lawl Virus has no known Pharmaceutical cure, however a number of home remedies have been put forward, many of which have been adopted by various factions and authorities as ad-hoc methods of on the spot treatment (often with a healthy dose of superheated plasma from the front cannons).
One suggested method is simple reason, communicating to the infectee (preferably over private communication channels, to avoid flooding local and system wide comms) in as close to their form of speak as can be done (so they understand) and informing them of their condition, proper behavior, and reminding them of what to do. Often, infectees must be re-taught how to interact with Society, but this is, more often then not, successful after a while.
Unfortunately, Lawl Virus infectees are often too warped, unable to communicate, or hyperviolent. In these cases, self defense takes priority, and proper authorities should be alerted. The ADMINS and The Angels are the best equipped groups to deal with Lawl Virus cases, possessing the most advanced equipment and rehabilitation techniques available.
In many cases, the Lawl Syndrome will dissipate and disappear on it's own, and the former Infectee will return to normal Society.
See Also: GC Tea House
