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+----- Thread: Liberty Forces Message dump (/showthread.php?tid=106350)
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Liberty Forces Message dump - Sonja - 05-29-2009
Transmission; Start
Identification: Commodore Christina Robinson
Location: New York system, Newark Station
To all Liberty law enforcement personnel:
The Embargo law has been updated again to include the Interspace Neuralnet Divisions' rather long list of accepted commodities passing across the border. Please make sure you are all well briefed on these new conditions. Also, you may be recieving orders from your superiors in the future regarding the matter.
Admiral Hale, Commodore Willows and myself will turn our attention in the near future to the other outstanding requests for exceptions to the embargo. Therefore, it is likely that the document, detailed here will get quite long. As I said earlier, it is therefore of paramount importance that, to ease the flow of traffic and make enforcing the law less time consuming and easier, that you know these laws or have them within easy reach if the need arises.
Please make special note of the excluded sub-commodities of whips, chains and liquid latex. If these are found on any vessel, it is of paramount importance that these are kept as far away as possible from Commodore Willows.
Transmission Terminated
Liberty Forces Message dump - Blighter - 05-29-2009
Transmission starting...
Sender: Willows, Sarah - Commodore
Recipients: All Liberty Forces
Listen up everyone, as Commodore Robinson put it so nicely in her latest transmission, the Embargo Law's been updated, so you're hereby ordered to hammer it into your heads.
However, apparently there was a slight error.
All whips and liquid latex found headed for Rheinland are to be transported to my personal residence on Planet Manhattan.
Likewise, all skimpy green dresses and chains are to be transported to Commodore Robinson's residence.
That is an order, soldiers, and you better not even think of messing with that one.
End of transmission.
Liberty Forces Message dump - Sonja - 05-29-2009
Transmission; Start
Identification: Commodore Christina Robinson
Location: New York system, Newark Station
I have no words, Sarah. Except these:
If I find any of you rabble at my door with a shipment of these skimpy green dresses or chains, I will rip you a new one. You will relearn the meaning of discipline, in the hardest way possible.
If I find that Commodore Willows has been recieving shipments of whips and liquid latex from any of you, I will personally hunt you down and see to it that you are left without a limb or two, and possibly suffering from a shortage of blood.
Are we completely crystal clear?
Good.
Transmission Terminated
Liberty Forces Message dump - Blighter - 05-29-2009
Transmission starting...
Sender: Willows, Sarah - Commodore
Recipients: All Liberty Forces, especially Commodore Christina Robinson
Gentlemen, ladies, especially the exotic dancers among us...
If I find out that a single shipment of skimpy green dresses or chains gets intercepted and not delivered to Commodore Robinson's residence, then I will arrange for you being introduced to my little friend "Stumpy", the happy soldering iron.
Same goes incase I don't recieve any intercepted whips or liquid latex.
Just that then I won't introduce you to Stumpy, but to a horde of... let's see... Phantoms? Sounds fun?
Oh and yes, that is an order aswell.
And Christina, as for the clear part... we're not, but your eyes were last night when we were out "having fun".
End of transmission.
Liberty Forces Message dump - Sonja - 05-29-2009
Transmission; Start
Identification: Commodore Christina Robinson
Location: New York system, Newark Station
A soldering iron? Is that the best you can do, Commodore?
If any person happens to visit me with any skimpy green dresses and chains, or delivers any whips or liquid latex to Commodore Willows, then I will have no choice but to show you the true meaning of pain.
Your home will burn.
Your kneecaps will be crushed.
Your fingers will be detached from your hands.
You may even find yourself in the barrel of the Heavy Mortar cannon on the Durango.
But worst of all, you will have met my set of golf clubs.
Do not disappoint me, men and women of Liberty.
Transmission Terminated
Liberty Forces Message dump - Blighter - 05-29-2009
Transmission starting...
Sender: Willows, Sarah - Commodore
Recipients: All Liberty Forces, especially Commodore Christina "Christycakes" Robinson
Bringing out the heavy artillery, are we?
Alright then.
Ladies, gentlemen, handsome men, and exotic dancers. (I'm looking at you, Phantom lady hacking into our comm channels.)
*clears throat*
If I don't see intercepted skimpy green dresses and chains being delivered to Commodore Robinson, and if I don't get the whips and liquid latex,
then I will "convince" you to volunteer as a test subject for our next-generation Type 1-337 "Pyramid Head" assault bots.
I'm sure I don't need to say more, but I'd like to emphasize that those come armed with heavy anitmatter candles, if you know what I mean.
Oh and Christina, I think you forgot your golden dress here earlier this morning.
End of transmission.
Liberty Forces Message dump - kingvaillant - 05-29-2009
Transmission; Start
Identification: Director David Copperfield
Location: New York system, Manhattan
Admiral and Commodores,
Could you please take some time to update the official document of the Liberty Laws? It is mandatory. The document can be found here.
As for the special mention related to skimpy green dresses, chains, whips and liquid latex, Simply deliver them to my cottage on Manhattan. I'll make sure both Commodores come to pick them up. Also, if you find any kind of oils or games, deliver them to me as well
Transmission terminated
((I have the PW for the account, PM if needed or spam the hell outta me on skype))
Liberty Forces Message dump - Sonja - 05-29-2009
Transmission; Start
Identification: Commodore Christina Robinson
Location: New York system, Newark Station
Ah, the type 1-337 "Pyramid Head" assault bots? Those are pretty tough to beat... but not impossible.
If I find any skimpy green dresses or chains on my doorstep, or any whips or liquid latex, I will not only send you to hell, I will drag you there, kicking and screaming. This is how:
Have you ever felt a hydraulic press? You know, those used to fashion ten centimeter-thick plates of steel? What about those used to test the strength of building materials?
Have you ever felt it crush your leg? Your stomach? Your ribcage? Your head?
I guarantee that you will not be paying attention to the antimatter candle when you are faced with the hydrolic presses used to recycle older ships.
Once your broken body is no longer able to feel the affects of the type 1-337 assault bot's antimatter candles, I will personally drag you to the most advanced medical wards in Sirius, have your body reconstructed, and you can go through it all again. And again. And again.
If that's not enough to convince you, then I have one other thing, but... well, ask yourself: Do you really want to know what it is?
Director Copperfield, it would be much appreciated if any of the materials you mentioned were to be disposed of as soon as they arrived at your premesis. If not, however... then read above.
On a different note, I'll come around soon to pick up that golden dress of mine, Sarah. This morning was pretty exhausting, I don't know how I got through the day.
Transmission Terminated
Liberty Forces Message dump - Blighter - 05-29-2009
Transmission starting...
Sender: Willows, Sarah - Commodore
Recipients: All Liberty Forces, especially Commodore Christina "Christycupcakes McSexypie" Robinson
Alright, fine. You really make me do it Christina, you really do.
Ladies, gentlemen and sissies.
If I find you not delivering the skimpy green dresses and chains to Robinson's residence, and if I find you not delivering me the whips and liquid latex, then I can assure you, Robinson's punishment will be nothing compared to your fate.
I want you to imagine a room.
The room, it is empty.
It has no windows.
There is no light.
There is no sound.
The air has no taste.
You are in that room.
You can't get out of the room.
You can't do anything in the room.
You can't even kill yourself in that room.
There is absolutely nothing at all.
Except for one thing:
David Hale after being depraved of "certain things" for... one year.
Alone.
With you.
Mr. Director... the above goes for you aswell, even though I appreciate your offer.
As for the oils and games, you might have to ask Admiral Hale about those.
Christina, you can pick the golden dress up later tonight, I can't reach up to the ceiling fan anyway.
End of transmission.
Liberty Forces Message dump - Sonja - 05-29-2009
Transmission; Start
Identification: Commodore Christina Robinson
Location: New York system, Newark Station
I make you do a lot of things, Sarah. You don't stop me either.
However, adressed to the entirity of the Liberty lawful force is the following message:
If I find any skimpy green dresses or chains at my residence, any whips or liquid latex at Commodore Willow's home, or anything at all at Director Copperfield's house... well...
Imagine that same room.
No light.
No sound.
Nothing.
Except me.
Holding a blunt metal shovel.
It can't kill you because it's blunt.
But it can break your bones.
It can break your body.
It can break your mind.
And I am the one holding it.
I would happen to have a box of very long nails and a large hammer.
My always-heavy clothes cabinet would also hang precariously above your head.
Worst of all, though:
Commodore Sarah Willows would be put in that same room after I left you to rot, fresh from her first fix of liquid cardimine, synthetic marijuana and large amounts of alcohol after over a year of deprivation.
You know, they do say 'what doesn't kill you makes you stronger'.
Are you really prepared to go through the assuredly painful process of trying to prove that, and failing?
Make the right choice, soldiers.
Transmission Terminated