' Wrote:Rogue gunboat, sailing up to a squadron of SCRA Bombers and not expecting to get shot?

Yes I recall.

' Wrote:Righto. I'm here, right now, to make a few things clear.

Thing 1: Recruiting! The purpose of the recruiting thread is NOT to make you hate your life. It is not (entirely) to amuse me, adrian, and bjorn. It is not there simply to make us look like tough motherf*ckers. We are, but it's not the point. The POINT of the recruiting thread is to see if you can follow basic instructions, to gauge your level of English literacy, to test your use of spell check, and to see if you can make a small, basic post without boring the cr@p out of me. Believe me, writing does not bore me easily. I've read three books in the last 24 hours, and I'm currently on my fourth (It's a good series, damnit!) I like reading. What I do not like reading is scribbles, balderdash, and something I would expect to come out of a 10-year old spelling bee, after someone fed them Ritalin. If there are no clear bloody breaks between your paragraphs, how the hell will I know? I HATE the wall of text!

See? Clear break, pretty simple. Run on sentences, another pet peeve, see how annoying this is going to become when I just keep bloody typing not slowing down not even bothering with a comma moving onto other subjects without a moments notice have I mentioned that I like cats and dogs and nomads and my dad was a nomad and and and and...

Run on sentences. Don't do it. Proper Punctuation! ---> , <--- The thing in the middle is NOT a period. Just to clarify. ---> ?! <--- That is WRONG, don't do it. --->:P <--- That thingie does NOT BELONG in a roleplay post!

Okay, on to other things. When we say apply in person, we mean it. If you said that you walked into the recruiting office, but all you told me was what colour your damn hair is, expect to get shot. When you apply for any job, do they ask what colour your hair is? Do they question your sex? Have you ever been asked what bloody colour your eyes are? Heck, even age is usually an afterthought! Don't fill in the "this is what I bloody look like" deal.

Don't act for us. If you pretend to be the commissar, and go "Well comrade, this looks in order, I'll just promote you to Commander and give you a cruiser", or some other unlikely happenstance, like getting accepted right away, expect to be shot.

Don't keep coming back without changing it up! If your last guy gets shot, or thrown in jail, or whatever, it's not because we like you, and we want you to keep wasting our time. Like whoever the heck claimed he was wearing low profile armour after we shot him. In the head. Honestly, this is a skype-based, manually edited, three stage application process. You cannot just sneak in. If you are rejected, get into the PM's, and ask what you did wrong. Look over my wee rant here, it'll probably help you out. If you keep putting in the same drivel, expect to get rejected.

Do Not assume we like you, we care, or that we've read anything about you in the past. I've been on these forums for a long damn time. I occasionally catch myself thinking of people who've been here for over a year as a 'new guy'. I'm quite busy, as are the other people who tend to the recruiting thread, and we no longer have time to read every RP post out there. If you're going to rely on past performance as a gauge, and put in a mediocre application, expect to be disapointed. Same thing with claims of skill in fighter/caps/bombers. Same thing with being from a former or currently soviet country. I'm canadian, I really don't care.

On that note, don't try to use the language barrier as an excuse for poor language. Several very important people in the SCRA do not speak english as their first language, but they manage just fine, better than me when I'm drunk. We have no time for your excuses.

Would you like to know what we do want? I don't care if you do or not, I'm on a roll, and I'm going to tell you. We want something that is clear and concise, preferably humorous, hopefully short, and that follows instructions. We want to be able to gauge you from this little blurb, to evaluate you, and to (hopefully) not find you wanting.

Then, we will question you. Respond well to these inquiries, as they're usually to establish something you missed previously. Once we actually start talking to you, not just shooting or ignoring you, you are making a step in the right damn direction. Don't try to place yourself in a position of power over us, it's our thread, and we are more than able to call resources from everywhere. Don't, for god's sake, metagame. Only we can do that.

If you are found able in recruiting, you'll be passed up. Most who are passed up gain full membership, but it's still a test. Don't turn off your wee minds, just because you've gotten to the next level.

Now, I'm going to post this, and then move on to another point. I shall see you shortly.