Discovery Gaming Community
Hiring Baristas Today! - Printable Version

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+--- Thread: Hiring Baristas Today! (/showthread.php?tid=137868)

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Hiring Baristas Today! - aerelm - 04-07-2016

As you all well know, admins don't like having to do stuff, be it paperwork related to community management or making coffee. Unfortunately, situations such as the former cannot be avoided and we grunt and groan but in the end get the job done. Situations such as the latter, on the other hand, can easily be avoided by yelling at the oranges to get us that damn coffee we need to pull all-nighters plowing through all the unnecessary paperwork you kind folk keep throwing our way.

With the orange team being understaffed as of late, you can guess why the greens seem to be having a hard time keeping up with the workload. Imagine all the time wasted day after day having to wait for the coffee machine to do what it does, or the time it takes to walk there and back to the desk... The first gen admins just had to pick the largest starship in the universe as their headquarters, didn't they? All our lives would've been much easier (and knees less sore) if they had just picked a freighter or something. But that's besides the point.

Back to the subject - We're looking to recruit new oranges to bring us the coffee we need... And here is where the friendly neighborhood admin would be expected to explain how this recruitment is going to work, giving some sort of template to fill and whatnot, and that's what I was initially planing to do, but then it occurred to me: If you're experienced enough in the community to qualify for orange, you should already know how this whole thing works, so go ahead and do what you think you're supposed to do if you're interested in leaving your old life behind and spending the rest of your days as a henchman to the conspiracy joining the orange and serving the community at the price of your own sanity.



RE: Hiring Baristas Today! - Ace Razgriz - 04-07-2016

So this is basically an observation of forum behavior for anyone interested to see if they fit the qualifications for serving the exalted coffee?

(P.S. I'm interested)


RE: Hiring Baristas Today! - Lythrilux - 04-07-2016

I, Lythrilux, a hard working and valued member of the community who loves the community and wishes to safeguard it, puts his name forward to be an orange. I'm also a fan of coffee, and make about 10 odd cups for myself a day. I should probably share those. Plus I bet my post count will be higher than that of all the applicants. That means something, right?

Interestingly my work just asked me if they need a Barista. Aerelm, are you secretly my boss?


RE: Hiring Baristas Today! - sindroms - 04-07-2016

That is a very interesting staff attitude towards picking what are basically admin candidates.


RE: Hiring Baristas Today! - Hannibal - 04-07-2016

(04-07-2016, 09:52 PM)sindroms Wrote: That is a very interesting staff attitude towards picking what are basically admin candidates.

doesn't always have to be that,sometimes you just need some forum moderators..

i'm already abusing the "view new post" bookmark,so..if there isn't better options,consider this as an aplication


RE: Hiring Baristas Today! - Mephistoles - 04-07-2016

I'm more intelligent than any of the candidates.


RE: Hiring Baristas Today! - Haste - 04-07-2016

I'm already above-average at shattering people's hopes and dreams so I'm basically a step ahead of everyone here, especially Meph.



A little more serious edit / extension of this post:

I've routinely browsed and checked this forum for a few years straight. Despite vanishing off to the realms of DOTA 2 and various other games from time to time, it was the one disco-related thing I've always kept doing habitually. I'm confident that I'd be able to incorporate moderating the forums into that "routine" and actually do something useful with my time spent mindlessly browsing the forums - and do a good job at it.

Oh, and I've worked a summer job as a bartender (close enough to a barista, right?) for the last three summers or so, so I've got experience unlike - I bet - the vast majority of the people posting in this thread ( :


RE: Hiring Baristas Today! - Stefz - 04-07-2016

Guys please, we already have a catmin, now we need a catmod.


RE: Hiring Baristas Today! - wanderer95 - 04-07-2016

Commonsense/No-Nonsense Vendetta for mod!


RE: Hiring Baristas Today! - Corile - 04-07-2016

People have asked me. Is Discovery in trouble? I'm going to tell you right now. Discovery is in trouble. But we're changing Discovery. What a crowd. Its great being here at the Discovery Forums.

Discovery is in serious trouble. We don't have new members anymore. We used to have new, but we don't have them. When was the last time anybody saw us getting an influx of new members, let's say, a Russian magazine? The lack of members kill us. It kills us all the time. All the time.

When was the last time you saw good Moderators? They moderate flood, and what do we do? When was the last time you saw a funny post in flood? It doesn't exist, folks. They beat us all the time.

How do we beat devs? They are laughing at us. At our stupidity. They beat us with their laziness and they think they do anything. They are not our friend, believe me. But they are killing us with their laziness.

Discovery has become a dumping ground for everyone's problems.

Mephistoles eats up large portions of the forums. His memes make him popular. I'm in competition with him.

Our enemies are getting stronger, and people say, Discovery, as a server, is getting weaker. They say our mod package doesn't work.

We have a disaster called the big lie: RP, the Roleplay.

I've seen my fellow Freelancer players. They're all wonderful people. I like them. I like their style. They want me to support them. They don't know how to bring it about. "Are you playing Freelancer? Are you not playing HHC? What do we do? How do we become as good as you, Protégé?"

Now our server needs, our server needs a truly great leader, and we need a truly great leader now. We need a leader that wrote the "I was bored" tutorials. We need a person that will literally take Discovery and make it great again. We can do that.

I can tell you, some of the Discovery members, they don't know what to do. Can they be good at pvp? I don't think so. My skills. I've beaten many, yes, many pro pvpers. People ask me, did you beat Mephistoles? I can tell you, yes, I did beat Mephistoles. Countless times. People ask me, did you win with Yber? Yes. I can tell you I did.

So ladies and gentlemen, I present to you, the Moderator, who will make Discovery great again. It can happen. Discovery has tremendous potential. And I am a tremendous player.

I am the greatest mod candidate that God has ever created. I tell you that. You get a lot of them that are overrated. They're not good. They think they are. They get good stories, because they're a friend of an admin. But they're not good.

So under Protégé's glorious rule, here's what will happen:

The good admins will come back, I would say doing the same things they've always done. It's gonna be Pavel and Cashew, not Garret Jax and aerelm. You know, they always want to be cool. And we'll say, sorry fellas, not interested.

Sadly, Discovery is dead. But if you pick me as your mod, you will bring it back. Bigger and better and stronger than ever before, and we will Discovery great again.

Thank you, Thank you very much.