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+--- Thread: To Captain, LNS-Roosevelt (/showthread.php?tid=66483)
To Captain, LNS-Roosevelt - mtjsmith - 09-19-2011
![[Image: mattln.png]](http://img101.imageshack.us/img101/691/mattln.png)
Target: Captain LNS-Roosevelt, CC: All Navy Officers
Location: Battleship Missouri, New York
Encryption:HIGH
Priority: HIGH
Subject: Idiocy.
Matt slams down a whisky, and throws the glass at the wall.
Captain, whoever tha' heck ye are.,
RIGHT PAL! I'm frecking annoyed by yer antics. First up tha' time ye take tae respond tae a distress call is frankly appauling. Tha' coward o'a Vidar was sighted in New York of all places and naebody did anythin' aboot it..
He grips onto the table and glares at the screen in frustration.
And then, when ye finally dae get there.. a full 15 minutes after I called fer backup n'my wingman was shot down - What did ya dae!? Oh, ye ask me tae keep it CD'd! Oh tha's nice.. What dae ya think I've been doing lad!? Runnin' around having a picnic?! This ain' my first rodeo pal, I've been around tha' block. I know whit I need tae do fer a battleship tae kill a cruiser.
But by God.. By the grace of New Caledonia, my mother n'father... Firing Battleship Missiles!? When there are friendly fighters about!? KEEPING CLOSE TAE THE CRUISER TAE KEEP IT DISRUPTED!?
Tha.. Tha's just plain idiocy. Whit dae ya think would'a happened?! Oh sure, I can outrun lasers, pulses and even mortar shots fae a cruiser.. But I cannae oot-run yer damn explosive waves! Nae withoot a frecking rocket powered skateboard, several whiskies n'a serious case of suicidal tenancies.
In ancient times, ye should be shootin' yersel' fer yer incompetence! AYE - INCOMPETENCE!
So.. How dae we get past this? Simple.
Ye start by refunding tha' total destruction o'my fightah, say a couple o'million credits. Ye start by grovelling tae me 'bout how sorry ye are - And ye throw in a few crates o'tha finest whisky in Sirius. Jura 787 AS, on my desk - By Wednesday morning.
If ye dinnae - I start issuing KoS's on yer filthy stupid battleship.
Just be thankful I got oot pal, if I were dead.. Heck.. So would you be.
Start grovelling.
He grips onto the table and glares at the screen in frustration.
And then, when ye finally dae get there.. a full 15 minutes after I called fer backup n'my wingman was shot down - What did ya dae!? Oh, ye ask me tae keep it CD'd! Oh tha's nice.. What dae ya think I've been doing lad!? Runnin' around having a picnic?! This ain' my first rodeo pal, I've been around tha' block. I know whit I need tae do fer a battleship tae kill a cruiser.
But by God.. By the grace of New Caledonia, my mother n'father... Firing Battleship Missiles!? When there are friendly fighters about!? KEEPING CLOSE TAE THE CRUISER TAE KEEP IT DISRUPTED!?
Tha.. Tha's just plain idiocy. Whit dae ya think would'a happened?! Oh sure, I can outrun lasers, pulses and even mortar shots fae a cruiser.. But I cannae oot-run yer damn explosive waves! Nae withoot a frecking rocket powered skateboard, several whiskies n'a serious case of suicidal tenancies.
In ancient times, ye should be shootin' yersel' fer yer incompetence! AYE - INCOMPETENCE!
So.. How dae we get past this? Simple.
Ye start by refunding tha' total destruction o'my fightah, say a couple o'million credits. Ye start by grovelling tae me 'bout how sorry ye are - And ye throw in a few crates o'tha finest whisky in Sirius. Jura 787 AS, on my desk - By Wednesday morning.
If ye dinnae - I start issuing KoS's on yer filthy stupid battleship.
Just be thankful I got oot pal, if I were dead.. Heck.. So would you be.
Start grovelling.
Smith out.
To Captain, LNS-Roosevelt - Jihadjoe - 09-19-2011
****INCOMING TRANSMISSION****
COMM ID: [color=#99FFFF]Fleet Admiral David Hale
TARGET ID: Captain Matt Smith, The captain of the LNS-Roosevelt. CC: Naval officers.
SUBJECT: Erroneous discharge of missile ordinance
ENCRYPTION: High
PRIORITY: Medium
Hale here.
Evening Smith, sounds like you've had a rough couple of hours. I would strongly advise however you calm down, and refrain from sending communications on vany frequencies while drinking. However given the circumstances, I will let it slide. Once.
Now... Moving on to the captain of the Roosevelt. Captain, first of all, I would like you to make yourself known on this channel. Quickly. Very quickly.
Friendly fire incidents such as this have been nicknamed 'Silent-Storm' incidents following an incident involving myself and some missiles fired by the carrier Silent-Storm. They are considered extremely serious. Deploying missile ordinance is a risky tactic to employ, particularly when there are friendly strikecraft in the target area.
Standard operating proceedure would be providing due warning to strikecraft in the area, allowing them time to relocate a safe distance from the area of effect. Failure to do this costs lives, Captain. I assure you, accidentally killing my officers is not something I take kindly to.
Furthermore, deploying missile ordinace against a cruiser class vessel is deemed an inefficient use of ammunition, except in circumstances where disabling a hostile warship's weaponry (for the purpose of safe boarding and capture of the vessel) is the priority, over the outright destruction of the target.
Captain... I don't know if you've ever experienced a forced ejection from a strikecraft due to missile fire, but I can assure you that it is one of the least pleasent experiences life has to offer. I would very very strongly suggest you deliver Captain Smith's bottle of whisky in person.
Now... Moving on to the captain of the Roosevelt. Captain, first of all, I would like you to make yourself known on this channel. Quickly. Very quickly.
Friendly fire incidents such as this have been nicknamed 'Silent-Storm' incidents following an incident involving myself and some missiles fired by the carrier Silent-Storm. They are considered extremely serious. Deploying missile ordinance is a risky tactic to employ, particularly when there are friendly strikecraft in the target area.
Standard operating proceedure would be providing due warning to strikecraft in the area, allowing them time to relocate a safe distance from the area of effect. Failure to do this costs lives, Captain. I assure you, accidentally killing my officers is not something I take kindly to.
Furthermore, deploying missile ordinace against a cruiser class vessel is deemed an inefficient use of ammunition, except in circumstances where disabling a hostile warship's weaponry (for the purpose of safe boarding and capture of the vessel) is the priority, over the outright destruction of the target.
Captain... I don't know if you've ever experienced a forced ejection from a strikecraft due to missile fire, but I can assure you that it is one of the least pleasent experiences life has to offer. I would very very strongly suggest you deliver Captain Smith's bottle of whisky in person.
Hale out.
[font=agency fb]****TRANSMISSION TERMINATED****
To Captain, LNS-Roosevelt - mtjsmith - 09-21-2011
Target: Captain LNS-Roosevelt, CC: All Navy Officers
Location: Battleship Missouri, New York
Encryption:HIGH
Priority: HIGH
Subject: Idiocy.
Captain,
I'm much calmer now than I was the other night but I do have to ask....
He looks around his room.
Ah... Where's tha' whisky n'apology!?
He looks around his room.
Ah... Where's tha' whisky n'apology!?
Smith out.