Galactic News Network!

[Malaclypse 666]

And now, it's time for "Galaxy Gab!"

with Brendan and Suzette.

(cut to live mcu, hosts. Both look aghast towards the ceiling.)

B: Look!
S: Up in the North!
B: It's a bird!
S: No! It's a spacecraft!
B: It's a blood!
S: No! It's a dragon!
B: Ho! It's a Blood Dragon!

S: It's a pirate!
B: No, it's a terrorist!
S: No, its a resistance fighter!
B: Sigh... no, it's really a cheap blackmailer.

(cut to cu, Brendan)

"That's right, folks! Up north of Kusari, the Blood Dragon Resistance, folksily known as the [BDR], have given up bullying in Battleships, and have resorted to cheap publicity stunts to make a "name" for themselves and their cause. They claim to have several KNF Admirals in custody, and are pestering the KNF with demands."

"Indeed, Brendan! I spoke with Ambassador deLuna just moments ago, and she gave me an odd look over the Holo-link. These BDR tossers apparently haven't even put together an intelligible list of demands to present yet. It smacks of something those shills and charlatans Omni Industries might have dreamed up and promoted for some outrageous commission!"

"Thank you for the unsolicited opinion, Suzette, but what did the Ambassador say the KNF's response would be to this little shakedown?"

"Oh. Well, Brendan, she had just gotten out of the shower, and was doing that stunningly beautiful hair of hers. She hadn't really given it much thought; and seemed exasperated that I would even bother her about it. She promised to look into it, and give me an exclusive when High Command is ready with a response."

"Very informative as usual, Suzette. I've heard several options rumored, so I'll add my equally juicy bits. There may possibly be an exchange of prisoners with the BDR. Apparently the KNF can't wait to rid itself of several hundred Blood Dragon and G.C. interees they've collected aboard their prison ship. The KNF may refuse negotiations and demands with the blackmailers completely. Another option popular with Captain Nebotuda of the KNF would be to turn Kyoto into slag, and simply replace those old doddering Admirals with some of the promising new blood which seems to be swarming to the KNF ranks in droves!"

"Wow, Brendan! Your sources are way better than mine! I do have one little "off the record" tidbit to add. According to an Ensign in the KNF I won't name, (although his initials are 'H.A.'), some supposed AW vessel tagged the Bluto or something, contacted him about a possible double-cross by BDR if the exchange option is decided on. So, from battleship bozos to blackmailers to backstabbers before you can say 'Hamburger on Tuesday'!".

"Well, Suzette, to continue your interesting but unrelated metaphor, if that had any bit of truth to it, then the KNF would be well within its rights to say 'I cant stands no more!'"

"And that folks, concludes our gossip for tonight. Join us again next time, when I'll share a secret I learned today about Ambassador deLuna's favorite nail color! Until then, I'm Suzette..."

"...and I'm Brendan the Anchor Man!. Join us next time for.."

""Galaxy Gab!""

Cut to commercial, Canaria Valley Creamed Spinach Ranch.

(Director: "Wait! Cancel that. The "real" news studio just reported that the Sponsor was just totally creamed by a sudden unexplained explosion! Run the Oro.de.Veranda Coffee spot instead. I love that old guy!")

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