"It is what it is," says Joshua, in a weary voice tone, while the searing noise of his engines was making up for the lack of his own video feed. "So much for creating a Neural Net account, huh. I've had to carry out a massive surplus of Medical supplies on some God-forsaken place in the back of New Berlin just to get this thing working from some Maltese idiot working in some bar. Talk about extortion. Bah, I guess I'll have to give some context here. Here goes nothing."
>ACCESSING NNID#37582938 DIARY LOG<
>THIS COULD TAKE A WHILE. PROCESSING REQUEST.<
>DECRYPTING<
>||||||||||||||||||||||| 100%<
"Uhm. Okay.
My name is Joshua.
Or Hans Jonathan Gespenst, that's my biological name. I'm just a young lad working as a merc around Sirius with my Audhulma, which actually belonged to my 'pa. Speaking of which, Francine used to excessively blabber about how good of a man he was. I have never really seen him myself, but every time I mention his name in front of her, she seems apprehensive and/or staggered. So much for being a good man, the guy just left this ship to her for no reason whatsoever and just got out of Rheinland space somehow. Bah, who knows if I'll ever see him again. Until then, I will stick with this wonderful, well-maintained literal shipwreck. The reason as to why I have managed to get my hands on it, well. Let's just say I have made some rather... irresponsible decisions in the past. Ever since I quit the not-so-prestigious "Kunst und Literatur" school in New Berlin, I have tried to fly around the system to get things done with some old scrappy Freighter, such as moving supplies from a station to another. I feel like it's the thing right next to the left thing. Get it? The right... thing to do. Or maybe I'm just being self-righteous again. Anyhow, once I did figure out my mother's intentions to send me off to some shady bar owned by some Hessian-aligned person, I actually sort of lashed out at her, and told her how I was truly striving for more than serving other people cheap drinks in some place on the far end of New Berlin. So, I decided to leave on my own for good. You know what they say, if you can't find a door, make your own. The poor woman wasn't even able to understand me, anyway. I am merely striving for more, damn it. I am sorely disappointed by the fact that more and more systems are being discovered, and how there are so many political parties settling disputes IN SPACE, Gott in Himmel. For instance, according to some reliable statistics, most of the Borderworlds have already been discovered. It's making me wütend. Some people live after serious planning on their actions, but that's just not really my thing. If a greater, actually righteous cause will show up before me at some point, I might as well just stick with it. Until then, I'll just fly around and get my contracts done, if need be. But then, I also realized how much Lady Luck did tamper with my life. I wouldn't have been able to leave my place if it wasn't for a sheer twist of luck. I wouldn't be fighting evil knaves threatening transports to death if it wasn't for the luck I have had in the past. I wouldn't be alive if luck had abandoned me when I needed it the most. In order to cherish my love and devotion to it, my entire mindset was radically changed, knowing how luck affects so many things. In fact, I'm always carrying a tiny, circular golden object, which appears to be an old coin of some sort with a Rheinland emblem engraved in it's back. The way the cross was designed in such a symmetrical way, the carvings on the side creating tiny little optical illusions for the human eye, it's staggering, all of it. I just want to hold this coin tight, it's the only thing I can hang on to, surprisingly enough. As a numismatic, I have never encountered such a magnificent object in my entire life. It's an old hobby of mine, which goes way back when I was a very young lad. I have never really talked with anyone about this, except with this God-awful recording device. And I'm glad. Now that I think of it, I have made a massive digression from my personal life, and I've ended up talking about unrelated topics, but I'll just get straight to the point now. I've heard that Liberty has quite the lot of knaves to take care of, and I feel like I'm just the right man. I have killed twelve people so far. Twelve human lives have been utterly pulverized in space by my guns, with their shipwrecks still burning adrift in space. Said men were nothing but maniacs, psychopaths, nothing but monsters who deserved worse than that. Which, unfortunately, also happened to carry a most rewarding bounty with them. Before whoever listens to this boring recording is going to question my ethics, I do not take pride in being murderous. Truth be told, I despise killing. Hell, even the most murderous Order terrorist could just recover from its own streak of insanity. But witnessing the arrival of "strange-looking" military men with psychic powers was probably enough to make me feel traumatized for my entire life. Only then I had realized that compassion is truly a rarity in this feverish hell of ravaging war. Now, that was a tad of an over-exaggeration, since the aforementioned "odd" people have been "taken care of", according to the Rheinland government officials, but I beg to differ. Everybody knows about the Nomads now, but Rheinland is still trying to deny the fact that they have been involved in a massive killing spree involving all of Sirius because of them. And now that the threat is gone, my entire homeland is lit up again because of another war against Kusari; it's almost as if Rheinland NEVER, ever gets tired of starting wars. Bah, eventually they'll learn their lesson again, perhaps a sound one this time. Now that my massive rant is over, I'm going to leave some recording time for an entire talk dedicated to Audhulma, as well. You have no idea how good it feels to fly an used ship, it's almost poetic and soothing. Someone else has been flying this thing from Rheinland to anywhere in Sirius. Who knows, maybe Mein pater really did fly his way to the Edge Worlds, and beyond. Who knows, maybe I'll catch up with him and slap his face for abandoning me. Bah, anything goes, I suppose. It is what it is."