Hello Bretonia, We are Nature's Last Hope, & we ask that you'll forgive our signal intrusion into your heads...our quarrels are not with you of the general public, & we lobby for your forgiveness.
...& we didn't bother encrypting the signal; the jackbooted teabags can't trace the signal fast enough anyway.
So, To the "Queen" & her lemmings:
It's awfully cute how you military types puff out your chests when backed into a corner like a little animal trying to make itself look big.
How adorable.
Your hold on power has been rotting on the vine for time immemorial, & your desperation is painfully obvious now that you have to harvest & taste the bitter fruit of your policies.
Remember, You can only exert authority over those who choose to recognize it.
We, the people of the twelve colonies refuse to recognize the Bretonian claims. Yet again we are witnesses of aggressive territorial policy, much like that which resulted in Tau 31 becoming a warzone. As president of the twelve colonies, I hereby declare that any and all Bretonian military activity or attempts to restrict peaceful traffic in the Orkney system will be met by a hostile response. Let there be no mistake - I wish not to see the quarrel between Kusari and Bretonia to escalate into areas it does not belong.
From: Takata Ran of the Black Dragon Society
Location: Kabukicho Base
To: BAF
Subject: Orkney
BAF, let it be known that your sudden claims to sovereignty over Orkney, a system you have neglected for centuries, and announcements about some kind of lock down, are being laughed at throughout Sirius.
The Black Dragon Society will ignore your false claims and we hope that no other Factions are fooled by such nonsense.
*Thinks....That's enough time spent on that discussion*
Incoming Message
Source - Francis Torvul, Reunion Base
Loading Data
Ah Lionne, I believe we crossed paths yesterday.
On to the matter at hand, however. Armed Forces of Bretonia, your actions are quite irrational. For you to restrict the main entry point for Gallia after all of the effort made by the Council to reunite its citizens with those who were bound for other territories in Sirius is just appalling. I ask not on my behalf or the Council's, but for the citizens of Gallia that you reconsider this action and allow unhindered passage to the ships traveling through Orkney.
If it really must come down to it, action will be taken to ensure safe passage in to and out of Gallia
Francis Torvul, Fleet Admiral of the Northern Council.
Incoming Transmission
Source: HMS Wellesley, Leeds System
A solid clip round the ear for any of you treacherous toads who defy this order. Let's deal with the complaints one at a time.
' Wrote:[Incoming Transmission]
Sir,
You have no right to close off this system.
The IMG not only have a base here, but we also are willing to defend our bases. Do not push us on this matter.
Also, we have made contact with some...others. I'm sure you understand what we are talking about here. Now, I believe that our respective councils and leaders need to talk before such a rash and hasty move comes into effect.
Syana Kyan.
Research and Development director of the IMG.
[Transmission ends]
The last time I had contact with a foreigner I acquired a nasty rash on my nether regions. Always err on the side of caution in such matters.
' Wrote:
...Incoming Transmission...
Source: Christopher Thorn, Junkers
-Begin Transmission-
"The Bretonians cant even keep their own systems under control, how do they expect to enforce law in a system far outside their house borders?"
-End Transmission-
Up yours, you little whelp. Get back to your filthy recycling plant.
' Wrote:Once again, the Queen and her loyal servants have decided to oppress the people around them, closing off a system over which they don't even have any control.
We assure you that this is a mistake. In order to support the innocent citizens traveling through Orkney, I have moved my operations to Orkney to defend against this imperialist aggression. And don't give any of that Rocky Mountain Oyster lumps about you not restricting the IMG- we know your intentions, we know your history, and we know that you have no right to deny access to ANY neutral parties to this system.
Rest assured, my crew and I will thoroughly enjoy disposing of any Bretonian personnel found enforcing this measure.
It is actions like these that make me ashamed of my Bretonian birth.
Death to the Queen! Long live the Emperor!
-Desert
(Transmission edited to reflect diplomatic updates)
(Transmission updated to reflect casualty updates)
UPDATE: My crew and I located an MI5 agent harassing a Zoner trader passing through Orkney today. The Agent's name will be withheld out of respect for the fact that a mere agent does not determine policy.
We had an exchange, after which he opened fire. We returned fire, and after a valiant fight, the agent's ship was destroyed.
More to come.
If Bretonian by birth ye be, one can only assume that it was the result of a liaison betwixt your filthy, syphillitic mother and a gibbon from Her Majesty's many menageries.
' Wrote:Signal Source: Imperial Compound, New Tokyo
Ah so this is what the Bretonians have resorted to, making decrees over systems they have no control over. The Orkney system is bordered by Tau 23, and the Lewis system. The Lewis systems is under the Sovereignty of our good friends in the NLH, whom I can assure you will not be allowing Bretonian ships use as a transit point. The Tau 23 system is completely outside of Bretonian control, with no friendly systems bordering it. With the my Samurai in control of the northern Section of the Seto system, Bretonian forces are completely cut off from the Orkney system, making any regulations they place on the system Illegal and invalid. The only groups with any legitimate right to regulate the Orkney system are the IMG and the Gaians, neither of who is the Bretonians.
Jien Kogen, Emperor of Kusari, Protector of the Taus and Sovereign of Seto
I have sent a shiny turd from my own warty bottom by express first class post. Enjoy it, you flatulent little anus.
' Wrote:
...Incoming Transmission...
Source: Jacqueline "Lionne" de Laval, The Council
-Begin Transmission-
"It puzzles me that the houses of Sirius would prevent their own people from reuniting with their long lost brothers and sisters in Gallia, this behavior reminds me of our own Tyrant King. Know that The Council welcomes all travellers and traders from Sirius into Gallia, so long as they restrain themselves and do not cause trouble for our current struggle against the crown."
-End Transmission-
Yes, one imagines you greet them with gonorrhea and such traditional Gallic fancies.
' Wrote:Hello Bretonia, We are Nature's Last Hope, & we ask that you'll forgive our signal intrusion into your heads...our quarrels are not with you of the general public, & we lobby for your forgiveness.
...& we didn't bother encrypting the signal; the jackbooted teabags can't trace the signal fast enough anyway.
So, To the "Queen" & her lemmings:
It's awfully cute how you military types puff out your chests when backed into a corner like a little animal trying to make itself look big.
How adorable.
Your hold on power has been rotting on the vine for time immemorial, & your desperation is painfully obvious now that you have to harvest & taste the bitter fruit of your policies.
Remember, You can only exert authority over those who choose to recognize it.
*Signal cut at the source*
Nature's hopeless lot can certainly twist a metaphor, eh? Here's a metaphor for your vile brood: you are an ass.
' Wrote:We, the people of the twelve colonies refuse to recognize the Bretonian claims. Yet again we are witnesses of aggressive territorial policy, much like that which resulted in Tau 31 becoming a warzone. As president of the twelve colonies, I hereby declare that any and all Bretonian military activity or attempts to restrict peaceful traffic in the Orkney system will be met by a hostile response. Let there be no mistake - I wish not to see the quarrel between Kusari and Bretonia to escalate into areas it does not belong.
Signed, President Alexander Wingates
Wingates
The twerps of the twelve colons had best watch their tongue before I set my mechanical tin-opener on ye!
' Wrote:*Open Transmission*
From: Takata Ran of the Black Dragon Society
Location: Kabukicho Base
To: BAF
Subject: Orkney
BAF, let it be known that your sudden claims to sovereignty over Orkney, a system you have neglected for centuries, and announcements about some kind of lock down, are being laughed at throughout Sirius.
The Black Dragon Society will ignore your false claims and we hope that no other Factions are fooled by such nonsense.
*Thinks....That's enough time spent on that discussion*
Takata Ran
*Transmission Out*
On a side-note, the Black Dragon <strike>is</strike> was also a rather sub-standard sushi restaurant near the old QCO barracks. I wined and dined my own darling Georgina there before she succumbed to the scrofula. The sake was satisfactory. I acciedentally spat some wasabi sauce on the head of an elderly clerical gentlemen one evening after a few too many jars of the stuff.
' Wrote:
Incoming Message
Source - Francis Torvul, Reunion Base
Loading Data
Ah Lionne, I believe we crossed paths yesterday.
On to the matter at hand, however. Armed Forces of Bretonia, your actions are quite irrational. For you to restrict the main entry point for Gallia after all of the effort made by the Council to reunite its citizens with those who were bound for other territories in Sirius is just appalling. I ask not on my behalf or the Council's, but for the citizens of Gallia that you reconsider this action and allow unhindered passage to the ships traveling through Orkney.
If it really must come down to it, action will be taken to ensure safe passage in to and out of Gallia
Francis Torvul, Fleet Admiral of the Northern Council.
End of Data
Closing
Transcripts of lectures on rationality from a nation of dog-eating vermin will be used to wipe the filthy behind of our regimental donkey at this evening's de-bagging ceremony.
' Wrote:[Incoming Transmission]
[ID Scrambled]
I am saying this in secret, as if I came clear the diplomatic repercussions would result in hundreds of my friends and family dying needless deaths.
Bretonia, stand strong, you are not alone, and even if this mean's I must come and fight by your side, so be it.
You fight for justice and freedom, and I admire that.
Know, you are not alone, and when the time is right, you will be replenished, reinforced, and reenergized. Just hold on.
[Transmission terminated at the source]
That's the spirit! Give that man a gun and point him at the devils.
Anyone in violation of Admiralty directives regarding Orkney will get violated by my crew's most muscular chappies in a manner devoid of romance or affection. Expect rough treatment.
Ah wellington, just the sort of diplomacy I expect from you Barbarian Bretonians. My Father told me when I was young, when people call you names, it just means they have no legitimate arguments on a topic, it is the path of the doomed. It makes so much sense now.