..:: Incoming Transmission ::.. To: Posers From: The League Re: Infringement of Rights
Hello, gentlemen.
The Evil League of Evil would like to inform you that as of Saturday, August 22, 816 AS (Global Manhattan Time [GMT]), we have been in existence. Noticing that our theft of jokes and thus our monopoly on the Sector-wide literacy exchange is threatened, we think it only fair to warn you to cease and desist the following actions immediately;
* Demands up to 5 credit units. Yes, we did say "units". Five space-bucks.
* Demands to tell a good joke.
*whisper* That's just what Herbert told me to say, but let's get something straight, you and I. We don't appreciate thunder thieves in the Caravan, of the Caravan, or around the Caravan. The Sector isn't big enough for the two of us, and if you don't quit the joke piracy, we'll have to take the thunder back. A very complicated process. I don't have the time to create a sonic recapturing device just because you idiots thought you could muscle in on the trade!
Keep your eyes peeled and your jokes in your pants.
Comm ID:Yaosquig Saucisse Source:New York, Planet Manhattan
Dear Empty League of Emptiness, why should we care about your demands.
If you want to sue us, go for it. I will ask my mom to hire 30 lawyers.
If you want to hunt us, come get us! But i bet you're too afraid to deal with people piloting starblazers!
If you want to abandon, please proceed. It's the only thing to do.
We will ask the number of credits we want, and to tell jokes no matter what you can try.
However, since your cause is lost from the beginning, you may consider to join us.
Comm ID:Blazer|Kit Transmit to:Evil League of Evil
Gentlemen? What's up, Doc? Need to borrow my glasses?
Joke piracy is no place for your evil monopoly of evil. Buuut, I'ma level with you here. You help me make a sculpture of that gizmo over there, and I'll make double-d-damn sure all jokes we get are told in public. If you don't like that, we can switch to stealing and telling jokes to every poor guy we meet, to make your headache worse if nothing else.