Posts: 6,121
Threads: 467
Joined: Nov 2014
Staff roles: Art Developer
i can't help but think of the killing floor medic healing.
"Stand still, or I'll stick it where the sun don't bloody shine. "
"I'm trying to heal you, not bloody tickle you"
"Stand still. Do I look like I'm nickin' stuff?! "
"Stay put, you div. "
From within the bowels of a hidden abode on a dreary night in France, a lone developer sits; her hands working the twisted and maniacal innards of a universe.
On the desk before her, two forms lie-- each one a disheveled and run-down shell of it's former existence.
The first of which, a Kiith Somtaaw Processor; ripped through the very fabric of reality from it's home in orbit of Hiigara, formerly defending it's Homeworld until the day that the crazed developer would bring upon it's demise.
On the other end of the desk, the Sirian Repair Ship-- this one a willing subject as it's purpose had been long since removed from it's now-pathetic life. With it's ability to assist others stripped from it, the Repair Ship had sold it's soul in hopes of achieving a greater status-- to be feared once more for the fleet-killer it once was. It had heard the call for willing able-bodied vessels of it's kind, and with tears in optics, it shakenly obliged.
Alley loomed over them, preparing her mastery of the forbidden developer's arts to bring upon a power that had caused her to be cast out--
"It can't be done" they said
"M'uh balancez" they cried
" it will destroy the very fabric of the server" the non-believers chanted--
but she would not be hindered by the dissenters-- No. Alley knew just what she had come here to do.
Using her necromantic powers, and with a single flick of the wrist, Alley tore the inverted Phased Dis-assembly Array from the Processor, tearing the lifeblood of the vessel out of it's now shriveled carcass.
As the Processor lay ruined and broken on the floor, Alley would seize the quivering Repair Ship; anxious as it's destiny was to be fulfilled.
Careful observers watched in abject horror, as that which they feared to be their doom was becoming reality right before their very eyes, helpless to do anything to impede the unholy power that was being created.
Alley plunged the PDA into the Repair Ship's meek and skeletal form.
In an instant, the developer had combined sacred and corrupt powers in a devastating display of masterful manipulation of the dark arts-- delivering onto this world a beast of unknown proportions.
Onlookers shrieked at the blinding glow of the transformation, as the now-insane Dev cackled in delight upon seeing her work come to fruition.
The shadowy arts of the Memes, still at the beck and call of Alley, would cast the Repair Ship back onto a Sirius in a state of perfect fear that could only watch as the long-prophesied doom was unleashed upon them.
-- and through it all, Meme-master Developer Alley, would remain in her domicile, contented that her work was completed;
The Memering-- had begun."
[ sci·am·ach ]
/sīˈamək/
A simple, angry man casually working his way through life on a personal quest to acquire copious amounts of street cred.