I am trying to look around, but my muscles do not move. I suddenly do notice my eyes are closed, afraid of the black all around me. When I open up my eyes, I see those energy streaks, colored with a blue shade. When I look closer, my eyes can recognize little objects moving on the streaks. It's like I would be in my own nerve system. With high speed the objects are moving to a centre. I can see a big 'construction' in the distance. I try to walk, but my legs aren't moving as well.
When I try to think desperately, I notice the blue, round objects on the streaks moving faster than normal but I can't think. I look at one of those moving 'balls', or whatever they could be, and keep my stare for a while.
Now it's cold. Everything stopped moving around me. And for some reason I cannot look away from that ball. It's pulsating in my eyes...it's getting bigger. My eyes widen up...but I cannot say anything anylonger. It's dark again.
Suddenly a light is flashing up. It dazzles me for a second, but then the light disappears again, I find myself in a dark room. It's looking familar for some reason. I finally can move. I look around and notice a table with a man laying on. When I move closer, I have to gulp. The man who is laying on the table is me. But I wonder what that odd glow in his eyes could be. I am taking some steps back as soon as I realize what it is. The man is fidgeting, something seems to be wrong. But it doesn't need much time for me to know what all that is. Suddenly more people arrive in the room by stepping through a nearby door. They hold the man on the table, but his movements improve. As the movement of the 'sick me' gets cut by something, he stares at the next person to him. The glow in his eyes has already improved. With a deep sounding voice the 'me' speaks at the person with a cold stare.
"Ours...will make you perish..."
The people around him are yelling something about an operation, that quickly has to be done. With some quick gropes, the man on the table is caught by the force of four men. They force him not to move by fixing his body on the table with shackles and ropes. I just stare and watch the happenings, knowing it is something, that happened not so long ago.
After the man's power is sealed by the shackles, one of the others around prepares a syringe, probably filled with narcotics, and quickly injects it into the main artery into the neck. The narcotics work very fast, knocking the 'me' out. Suddenly the room gets darker and darker. I only can see how the men prepare the necessary equipment before I can't see anything anylonger...the darkness is winning the upperhand again.
When I open my eyes again...I am back at the place where I was before....the place with the streaks and the blueish, moving balls on them...
Warping light is all around me...it looks like I am in some kind of jumphole...but without a ship. When the light goes brighter, I can see the end...whoosh. I stare at a white wall...the textures are not very detailed. But after some time passed, clear structure was to see in the wall...it was no longer a white wall. I am staring at a Nebula...the system by itself looks white too...a lot of 'clouds' in the background and a blue sky in space.
Where am I? I don't know...but I am 'stepping' through the nebula to see what's on the other side. I suddenly get dazzled when I exit the nebual again. The light source behind another round object, I cannot identify, is blue...putting the round thing into a contrast with the rest of the system from my view It's looking like the source of energy in this system...sharing it's power with all the other things in the system...it's a star. When I 'walk' closer, I understand the round object is a planet...green, blue, inhabited. I notice several other ships all over the place, ships from the Corsairs, Zoners...and then, to my surprise, ships of the Order. It's only one to be concrete. It's requesting a permission to land on the planet...what it does after some time. However...all the ships at the place don't seem to notice my own presence.
I follow the ship down to the planet...and I can see how it lands on a landing pad nearby a modern build castle. I see a pilot exiting the ship. He looks familar to me. I see the possibly Order agent walk into the castle with his usual pilot suit. I follow...
The room I enter is big...a lot of people are present. I can recognize the Hunter family, some Zoners I remember as well. But nothing, that draws too much attention. I am watching the man who just arrived and is now walking towards a stool at a counter. But someone I didn't notice is the other man...he is looking like a Corsair for some reason I cannot remember. I know him. He was with the Order agent who just arrived. However, I loose him after the Corsair heads to a table where a couple is sitting...also people I can remember.
The time passes...when I suddenly can notice two more ships landing infront of the castle. One of those ships is looking odd. Or just different? I don't know. After some more time I can see two persons walking towards the entrance to the castle...god damn..I know who is that. It has been too long since the last encounter, I think...but she is here, escorted by a man who is wearing a smoking. The woman an awesome dress. Hell wants to see me glow...or why am I seeing that purple haired woman now?
I am not sure anylonger what to think of all that. But I try to focus and watch them walking in...seemingly drawing a lot of attention as soon as they enter. The Order pilot I was watching as well, turns his head to the happening, too. Though, it doesn't really seem like the guy would know that couple...that man who is holding the hand of the purple haired woman. However, I see them walking over to the Hunter family...and after some time of hot conversations the situation is getting calm again. I see that...woman walking to a table, sitting down and then, seeing the Order agent, who hasn't been here for not even a full hour, walking to her. I can't hear what he is saying...but the female person at the table seems to let him sit down.
Odd...for some reason I cannot move closer, listening to that conversation. I only see their mouths moving when they talk, but no sounds. After quite a while, I suddenly begin to hear something. I have been spending the time with watching that woman and the agent, there at the table. And after an endless time of silence I begin to hear something? When I look closer, the agent is staring at the table while the purple haired woman is somehow absent as well. The voices are getting louder, but I can't see their mouths move. I can only hear...her voice and his thoughts. It's like hell...I can't concentrate anylonger.
All the words are roaring in my ears...I try to cover them but I can't. I hear her voice is getting way stronger than the tone of the thoughts of the agent there. I can't stand it...it's like someone would beat me on the head. The light passes away...my view is getting darker...the only thing I can see before passing out is, that she is shaking...me...
I am at the same spot like in the...vision or memory before. I see light passing me. But this time I am not alone. I am being escorted by a whole fighter wing of Order agents. Finding myself in an Order ship as well, we set a course to Planet Gran Canaria again, where a convoy, mixed of OSI ships and ships from the Omicroners, who all were on a seemingly important mission. When the Order wing arrived, the convoy begins to roll...with another Agent and me as scout. The voice of the pilot I should scout with is familiar, trusted from somewhere but I can't remember. Our ships head back to the jumphole where we came from.
In another system, that seems quite familiar to me is entered. The orange sun in the middle of the system with the two orange, clear visible, nebulae and the asteroid field when exiting the jumphole. The convoy is still rolling with the Agent and me as scouts. We head to the next jumphole we have saved in our databanks...that one that leads to Omega 41. Everything seems to be quiet, odd for space. When I was flying through the system earlier the fact, that silence in space can turn into a heating battle have clearly been proven. But though, there is nothing. Except for the still lasting echos in my head from different things, everything is quiet. So we make it to the jumphole easily.
That star or already dead star in the middle of the Omega 41 system...always a nice sight if there wouldn't be the radiation. Not really finding much of in us interested people in the system, the next system is clear. There is a feeling of boredem in my head.
It suddenly all becomes odd. As soon as the convoy gets into Omicron Kappa, by passing Omicron Theta and 74 before, I can hear voices in my head. It has been like that only once not so much time ago. However, the closer we get to the jumphole, the stronger the voices become. And as we enter Omicron Delta then, they roar inside my head. There is everything alright with the convoy...but not with me, nor with something else in the system. I am ordered to scout ahead once more, so we should prevent hostile actions and activity against the convoy, that's already moving towards the Freeport. God damnit...I think my eyes fall off when I look at the scanner. A whole nomad fleet is waiting at the jumphole to Omicron Minor.
I only can remember a lot of explosions and organic fragments flying around after one side fell down. Somehow we managed to get through and destroy their main attack force so that they retreated back to their home...the voices weren't so loud anylonger. When I see myself back in Omicron Minor, I can see how the convoy docks on the Battleship Isis, unloading their cargo. I feel like I have completed an important mission...but not really knowing what it was exactly...
Like an impact on the head with a heavy stone, my hands run up to my head, grabbing it in pain. Voices and pictures in my mind let the power suck out of my body almost immediately. While the preperations for the next patrol seem to be done already, others could see something is off. Barely able to stand due to the pain, my feet are searching for any kind of stabilization, I lean against the hull of my ship. Suddenly the alert is to hear. Someome shouts, that nomad capital ships are passing by right now.
Exactly knowing what caused that sudden pain and the visions, I start to concentrate myself more, getting into the ship, that seems to be mine. After undocking from the Toledo docking ring, the vision is clear as it only could be. One Marduk was passing the system, followed by a slower one behind. Suddenly there was a disturbance. The first Guardian got stopped by allied vessels...I see cannon fire coming from the capital ships of the Order. It doesn't need much time until the Guardian disappeared with a big explosion...
However, the other Marduk is now changing the course...it flys away from our ships into the nebula. We loose the contact...but know where they want to go. Calling another fighter craft to come with me, we head to New York with two vessels. Arrived there, near Manhattan, we see a 'dispute' betweem the Nomads themselves. It doesn't need much time until they open fire on each other...but in my head...I could hear them all. One of the Nomads, one of those Guardians, is screaming in pain...something is wrong. It is showing different behavior than the rest of the swarm...unusual.
But then...after that Guardian was destroyed, the Nomads begin to destroy civillian vessels. So we step in...purging the aliens with the help of the Liberty Navy...though, after the battle is over they immediately turn against me...with my wingman lost I have to flee. Only one person lets me go...Hale...
The feeling of coldness and a shiver cross my memories as I can find a whole part of it missing. My head is empty...not containing anything but the black of not-knowing. I try to concentrate more, to focus on what was important. But I can't find it. I can't see anything. But when I continue travelling through my memories, I can see a weak light. It leads me the way...I begin to remember fragments. I am on my way home to Toledo from another, rather long patrol. When in range of the docking ring, I suddenly receive several new contacts on my scanner. One of them was hostile, another one friendly. Yet far away, I can see one of the ships belong to the Order. I count four ships in total. But something is wrong. I can feel the presence of somebody I met before. And my feelings weren't failing me as I move closer. Kate Miller is staying with two other, unidentified ships. First I hesitate to get closer but then my curiosity gets the upper hand and I move closer, trying to find out what exactly is going on. I learn, Golanski is on the cruiser sized Order ship. It seems like he would know what is going on. I ask him...but don't receive an answer.
I realize there is something off. The neural 'waves' coming from Miller aren't the same as before on Canaria. Something has changed. Then...she speaks. In a fraction of a second I realize...she is becoming one of those I despise so much. But it doesn't seem like she would have given up yet. Rather the exact opposite. She is fighting against the presence, that is making her aura look different. She and Golanski are talking about a machine, that should somehow prevent Miller from going insane, in terms of loosing humanity completely. Not much time later the decision has been made. Golanski ordered me to 'take care' of Miller as well in case something should go wrong. She docks at the docking ring, soon followed by Golanski. Before taking a further step I escort the two unknown ships out of the system, which seemingly brought Miller here and even helped us a bit. Without much more words, they jump trough the jumphole to Omicron Delta. I head back to the docking ring and land on Toledo, already seeing a large amount of heavily armed marines, staying around that Bastet. I join Golanski and see Miller walking out of her ship. The marines move back a bit, not Golanski and me. For some seconds I just stare at her...her eyes are glowing but every step looks like a challenge. We bring her to a secret, classified place I wasn't aware of before. Lazarus...not something that sounds familiar to me. But for some kind of reason I always must look at Miller. I feel sorry for her to see her like that. I just hope my odd feelings are not winning the upper hand and lead me to stupid actions. However, we arrive at the place...I support Miller to walk into the main hall of "Lazarus" and lead her to some kind of platform there. I leave her there...and do something she tells me...
After I type a command into the console nearby, the whole room suddenly gets enlightened by bright, blueish light. Everyone suddenly seem to hear and see voices and visions from the mindshare itself. It is painful...my head feels like it would explode soon. The voices roar in my head, I can't get a clear view of what is going on with Miller..the visions are clouding my sight. After a seemingly endless time, I remove my hands from my head and rush over to Miller, who is laying on the ground, unconscious. A medic team hurries into the room shortly after and begin to take care of her. 'She has got a pulse, so she is alive.' I think at that moment after I felt her heartbeat. I head out of the room as I see I couldn't do anything anylonger. Sure they would take care of her. The further steps concerning her would then make the Overwatch.
I head back to my quarters and try to grab some some sleep. But I can't sleep. I can't stop thinking...
The now felt energy through the void is strong, superior and almost killing. When trying to find out what it is, I get blocked by something...or someone. The fact that I don't know what it is, makes me feel unsure. It all comes from the event not much time ago. It's like it would happen again. Unleashing energy like that machine did happens rare, even never when looking closer. It makes me feel we are watched. By the very same 'object', that was there at that day, I get more nervous the longer I am alone. Lifting my 'vehicle' off the white surface, I stare into the void again some time later, colored by the system's nature in green.
It hasn't been longer than two weeks already, since that...day passed. I still can only think about one thing. But however, the energy, that warned me, has to be found, the source of it. 'But how?' I ask myself, only knowing one possible way to get to the energy source. But the way would be filled with death and the descendants from the core...the primary 'engine' of the energy. But there wouldn't be a way through, not even with the strongest mind ever existing in the human kind. Except for maybe one.
I feel warmer when another vessel joins me in the green void. It is exactly that person, I was thinking about all the time. Together we shall find the -engine- and it's 'mechanics' of the so feared enemy we all are aware of. Like a miracle, both of us feel the same. The energy strenghtens itself with something, that hasn't been active yet. Something, that even seems to go below the comprehension of my...partner. But we try to find it...and move to the entrance of the throat of the beast. Like before an infernal blast, that threatens to erupt every second, we stay there...just trying not to lose ourselves in that chaos of energetic signatures and streaks, that are passing us and go through our bodies. Then it happens.
Like expected, the entrance spits out something...threatening. In not even a split of a second I withdraw, the energy of the being tries to kill both of us. The aggressive nature of the energy almost finishes us...I see my partner slowly going down. The being tries to erase the existance of someone, who seems to be close. I build up my last reserves of the energy I have left and get my 'partner* out of there by interupting the channel between...her and the -source of the energy-. We flee...to a more distant place but still close to our home. Our home? I don't even know if she looks at it like that.
When everything is calm again and we arrive in the system we headed to, we see two more of our kind. I think so at least. But yeah...humans. There seem to be two persons I already know...but she knows better. One of those. She seems to be very close to one of them, the human named Dangen, I believe. There is a relative of our current leader...a very similar name but though, the same I know.
She and he are talking about...family and what they will or should do...what they have done to each other, if there ever was something I know, I am sure it's her feelings for him. Have always been there. Sad...but it doesn't stop me from feeling what I feel. They leave the place around that station...and...we set a foot on it after a while.
-- I feel strange...like if something would consume me from the inside. But it's not a negative feeling. It's the opposite. She and I move somewhere to rest...seems like other places are pretty full already. When I look at her, seeing how much that...machine did to her but also prevented her from the worst, my body starts to shiver slightly. I can't control my heartbeat anylonger, it's on a racing level. When we enter the place, meant to be the place to rest, she reveals the scars of her life, 'telling' me how hard the life was already. Never before, I have seen 'pain' like that. But she is looking at me without any fear about what happened. She takes my hand...suddenly my view starts to blur. She and I relaxing there...what do I say? Anything? No...I let my mind handle the things and get closer to her...closer...closer...finally...-united-.... --
Time passes...standing there on the bridge slows everything down. Can't bring up any plans...too much egoistic thinking, too many...emotions. I try to let go of it...slowly. Day after day...
My mind shuts down, slowly turning every single feeling into almost nothing but my thoughts, coursing through my head. I feel nothing as I stare at planet Manhattan from the bridge...I look around at the crew, doing their job as they should. People I saw in my younger years as Order are also there. People I could consinder friends. But there is nothing anymore. I look at them like at everyone else.
The only thing I feel when I look at Manhattan, is the will to finally understand the flow of the balancing energy, running the overall existance. A hard task to accomplish. If it even is possible to learn more about it, I will do -everything- to achieve that knowledge. It will probably tear apart myself. But as far as I understood, it doesn't really matter anyway. Time has come to face the thing everybody is so much afraid of. The truth. Nothing else matters anymore. Personal feelings got shut down...the relevant things kept. I terminated every single contact to anyone in the colonies, as well those beyond the core worlds.
Even if I am surrounded by people who will help and support me, it's nothing anyone of them would even dare to do if they see why we are here...not as Orders, not as humans. Things have changed. I have plans and will execute them. Everything is ready.
