Hannah had been waiting at the playground since 8am. Going over last nights conversation in her head. The biggest question she couldn't shake was 'will he come?'
It was 9am, an overcast day in the Dallas district. He still wasn't here. Hannah sighed before deciding to give Bryan 15 more minutes before she would leave.
It there's one thing that always bothered Bryan, it's the fact that that the only way he had survived this long working undercover, was because he trusted nobody. Distrust of others was nessasary for survival, but also acted as a doubble edged sword, severing all possibilities of a meaningful relationship. The sword had pierced the heart of his first marriage and left a wound that remained with him still. As much as he would like to trust Stephany, he simply could not allow himself to. There was too much at stake to afford to slip up. So as was his custom when entering blind to a meeting, a 4 inch combat knife found its way into the inside of Bryan's left boot. The hilt sat about half a centimeter above the top of his boot, identical to a fake notch on his right boot. Hiding things in plane sight was in of Bryan's specialities.
Bryan decided take the longer scenic route from the shuttle terminal, to the park on Bryce Road. The walk was to allow himself time to think things through and calm his nerves, but ultamately had achieved nothing more then stalling his meeting with Stephany. He could still feel the warm kiss on his cheek from the other night at the West Wing pub. Her warm friendly smile, the scent of her hair, and the hypnotic beauty of her eyes tormented him, robbing him of the ability to eat, sleep or even breathe properly from that moment on. Against his better judgment and rational thought, and despite the potential danger to himself and his undercover assignment, Bryan simply had to see her again.
Bryan rounded the next building on the corner of the street, revealing the park in front of him. Then he saw her sitting on the swing facing him, as if she had expected him to show up in that exact spot. From the swing she had a decent view of everybody coming and leaving the park. Bryan coulddn't help but wonder if this woman was just lucky, or knew exactly what she was doing.
Walking slowly over toward the swing set, Bryan felt his heart start to pound hard in his chest. His excitement and anticipation slowly talking over the closer he got. Bryan finally stoped about 3 meters from Stephany, waiting for a responce. Finally after a brief pause to collect himself, Bryan spoke.
"I know it's only been one night, but I missed you. It's good to see you again"
Hannah was getting irritated. He was late, and that meant one of two things. He wasn't going to turn up, or he was just late. She took a seat on a swing and looked around the park. From here she had a view of the main entrance on the road she had directed Bryan to. 'Where is he...' She glanced down at her watch, 9.15am. Hannah went to look across the playground one last time, and smirked when she saw him appear from around a building. Part of her was excited to see him arrive, but she knew he could be nothing more then a means of information. She had lied to him too much already, and he was a smuggler. After she gave up reasoning with herself, she lent down, and picked up her bag pretending to be trying to find something in it. She knew her choice of seating could be seen as a skill, so she acted as if she hadn't noticed him. "I know it's only been one night, but I missed you. It's good to see you again" Hannah looked up at him, closing the bag. Noticing the notches on his boots, the color and cut of his pants, and the leather jacket he had been wearing the night before. 'A well dressed smuggler.'
"See that duck over there, do you think she ever misses her babies? I mean, every year she has some, and every year they leave."
Hannah shrugged before asking him if he found the park all right. It was further out of the way then most of the places she could have chosen. A good hours walk away from her home. She had to be sure she wasn't going to put herself in a place where he would find her shed. Hannah realised she was rather under-dressed next to Bryan, a white singlet top, with torn denim shorts. Oh well, at least I'm comfortable.. She wondered whether he was a smoker, as she realised she wanted a cigarette. She decided she would wait and see if he was before she took them out of her bag. Looking up at Bryan, she motioned for him to sit on the swing next to her, grinning as she spoke.
"So.. You never got a chance to answer my question in the bar..."
"So.. You never got a chance to answer my question in the bar..."
Bryan remembered her question, she wanted to know if he had always been a "courier", knowing exactly what she meant by that. The fact that he could not be honest with her, was already starting to bother him.
"Money... this sick sad planet revolves around it. There's just no way to make ends meet in an honest job anymore. You start working around the clock, always home late. then you start leaving for weeks at a time. Eventually you have to find some way to make ends meet."Bryan coulddn't look her in the eye, instead was focusing on the duck Stephany had pointed to earlier."Wasn't until my wife left me that you realise what is happening. By then you just dont give a damn..."Bryan then turned his head to face Stephany, his face softening as he looked her in the eye.
He smiled first, then continued."But, this is my life now, and it's not all that bad. I have rules about my job, and I make just enough to comfortably get by."
Hannah nodded as she listened to him talk about money. She knew the importance of it in real life, but didn't really care for it. "Wasn't until my wife left me that you realise what is happening. By then you just dont give a damn..." She refrained from smirking and making a comment on this, it didnt add up in her mind. 'Hmm, can't get a relationship in a real job, what makes him think he will get one as a smuggler? Gone for weeks at a time... Good luck I guess'
"Catch 22, right. Don't work too much, don't get any money - work too much don't keep a relationship for more then 5 minutes."
Hannah shrugged, and looked around again. It was quiet here at the park, she appreciated that. There was a pond to one side, fenced off by a chain that wouldn't stop children from climbing over if they really wanted. Trees grew along two sides of the park, hiding it from the houses behind, and business' had taken over the other edges of the park, creating a dreary grey wall.
"Money is over rated anyway. Have you ever seen someone who was earning heaps actually being genuinely happy? More often then not, they are satisfied, living life comfortably, but they never take notice of the small things."
"Catch 22, right. Don't work too much, don't get any money - work too much don't keep a relationship for more then 5 minutes."
Stephany's comment made Bryan chuckle. Her words were blunt yet true just the same. For Bryan, work had never been about money. It was his duty. To society, to the LPI and ultimatly to himself.
"Money is over rated anyway. Have you ever seen someone who was earning heaps actually being genuinely happy? More often then not, they are satisfied, living life comfortably, but they never take notice of the small things."
Bryan leaned foreward from the swing he was sitting on, trying at first to meet her gaze, then later joining her at observing the going's on in the park. Bryan looked back up at the trees, to the birds nesting in the upper branches.
"It's ironic really. Nowdays I earn just as much money as I used to, in a fraction of the time. I've gone from having no time for love, to having nothing but time... " Bryan trailed off from that sentence, looking down at the palm of his open left hand, then back across the park.
"You're right you know. Those guys earning heaps money just have more stuff to worry about. So what small things make you happy?" Bryan made himself smirk from his own comment, a smirk he was hoping would attract Stephany's gaze. The more time Bryan spent with Stephany, the more he longed to be with her, to know all about her.
Hannah was lost in thought, not paying as much attention to his comment about time. 'What am I hoping to get out of this... I need to do something soon if I am going to get anywhere...' She looked up at him, realising he had asked her a question, and seeing him smirk. She grinned slightly, before brushing a strand of hair away from her eyes.
"Small things... Well, I like the rain on a tin roof - has to be tin though, and the little yellow buttercups and their reflections when kids play with them, the busker that usually plays guitar on the corner there, um, getting out of town and going to the beach at 2 in the morning to see the stars.... annnd"
She bit her lip as she was thinking about what else to say.
"Well, I guess you will have to wait and see for the rest."
Hannah grinned, remembering the times she had gone and done those things.
"What about you, you must have some little things you enjoy in life. Cant all be spare time and work."
"Small things... Well, I like the rain on a tin roof - has to be tin though, and the little yellow buttercups and their reflections when kids play with them, the busker that usually plays guitar on the corner there, um, getting out of town and going to the beach at 2 in the morning to see the stars.... annnd"
For a brief moment when she spoke it sounded like she was referring to growing up here on Manhattan, something that puzzled Bryan. It was just yesterday that Stephany had mentioned being born and raised on planet Pittsburgh, which to Bryans memmory seemed to have no water to speak of, let alone beaches. In any case Stephany seemed to be very familiar with this place. Which left Bryan with two possible conclusion. That Stephany was hiding something about her upbringing, or had simply chosen to omit seemingly unimportant information. The other possibility, which was the far more likely of the two, that Bryan was once again over-analysing her choice of words and needed to relax more.
"Well, I guess you will have to wait and see for the rest."
Stephany, whether she was aware of it or not, had gained complete control of Bryan's smile. Her charm beginning to warm the heart of this harderned undercover detective.
"What about you, you must have some little things you enjoy in life. Cant all be spare time and work."
"Well... " Bryan tried hard to think of something other then firearms and hand to hand combat training, both of which he took great personal pride in. Then he remembered his favourite pasttime since he was a young boy. "I like to go for a run whenever I can. doesent really matter where, at the beach, down the street, sometimes jogging through what's left of the natural reserve here on Manhattan. Nothing beats the feeling of being totally disconnected from the world... I find it helps clear my mind, and lets me focus more on what I really want"
His eyes softened as he studied Stephany, watching carefully as she casually bit down on her lip, and removed hair from in front of her eyes. Her eyes had siphoned away all his rational thinking by this stage, leaving only his intrigue, and the bitter taste of the lies he had fed her.
Hannah realised, after seeing a momentary change in Bryan's expression, she had told him she was from Pittsburgh. "Yeah, I spent a bit of time here with my Grandparents over the holidays" She shrugged, 'damnit... I hope he believes that..' She smiled and bent down to pick up her bag to take a bottle of water from it. took a sip, and offered it to Bryan.
"I like to go for a run whenever I can. doesent really matter where, at the beach, down the street, sometimes jogging through what's left of the natural reserve here on Manhattan." Hannah smiled and shook her head "A runner, huh? Not often you find someone who enjoys that now days, well, not not that everything is literally all computerised." She laughed and tipped her head slightly sideways listening to what he said next. "Nothing beats the feeling of being totally disconnected from the world... I find it helps clear my mind, and lets me focus more on what I really want" She nodded, knowing exactly what he meant. She did the same thing with finding quiet, secluded areas and drawing. She hadn't found the time to do that, and quickly brushed the thought away as she decided she was just too busy. "Well, what is it that you really want?"
She frowned slightly, not entirely sure how he would answer that. This would give her a solid idea as to how to deal with Bryan. Some men were looking for love, a family and someone to settle down with. Others were after lust, and a good time for a night or two. Few were after revenge, blood spilt from someone who had hurt them or a loved one. 'Please be after love...' She stopped and wondered why she had made that comment, 'I need something easy in my life, and my job, for a change....'
Stephany's question echoed its way through Bryan's mind, scratching at the corners of his subconsious in a vein attempt to unearth an answer. He began to think of his first wife, Samantha. He remembered the soft touch of her hands reaching behined his neck, her fingers running through his hair as he held her in his arms. He still remembered their first kiss, standing outside the front door of her inner city appartment, in the light drizzling rain of a sun shower, running his hand across her face to clear a stray hair from her eyes. But all that was gone now, the fire extinguished, the ash carried away by the wind. Samantha had moved on and had started a new life with a new man, whilst Bryan had perservered on his own.
Bryan wanted to feel that human touch again. That's what he wanted above all else. He longed for that day to come when he could tear down this lonely prison he had built for himself. To regain the spirit of living he had left behined.
Bryan stared intently into Stephany's eyes for what to him seemed like an eternity.
"I want..."
The right words had escaped him, his eyes leaving hers momentarily as he gathered his thoughts. Speaking no longer as Bryan West the smuggler, but rather, as the human being on the inside, he continued.
"I want to be happy, truely happy... And I'm not talking about having a good time or those small things that make you happy for just a breif moment. I'm talking about waking up in the morning proud of the person you are... And of where you are in life."
Bryan slowly stretched out his left hand towards her right hand, palm facing up.
"It's taken me a few year to realize that I can't do that alone. I want somebody, not for tonight, but for the rest of my life. I want to spend the rest of my life making that special someone happy."
Bryan paused as he reflected on his own words. "I hope that's not too scary" he added, a smile cracking his sinscere face.