Source: Skarsi Wyrdmake
SWyrdmake@Discord.BFN
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Signal Strength: Very Discordant
Encryption: 5 tons of Flax
Subject: Burying the cabbage.
Kallisti to the Order.
You probably wouldn't expect a communication from the Discordian Disorder but the Chao has started spinning in a new direction and our Pineals are receiving the rearrangement of the perception of cabbages thanks to the law of fives.
Or in other words, in light of the chaos being sewn by the Core Cabbages the Popes feel it's the right time to bury the hatchet and focus on mutual enemies. It is clear from the Chao that the Core is ruled by the greyfaces setting out to cause Order where disorder should exist.
So, what do you say we make peace? disorder? ahh... we'll share flax together in the fight to dispense with the cabbage scourge.
Since Jeremy nearly had a telekinetic tantrum just trying to understand you, he asked me and my infinite wisdom to respond.
Now uh...let's see...we want to bury the cabbage hatchet yes, preferably into Nodtviet's Cabbage-face with the force of ten thousand tons of Flax. Is that right? I think that's right, this Basic to Discordian Language book is like five years out of date...And furthermore, in our never-ending battle to end the Brussel Sprout menace we know as the Nomads, I swear I'm on vacation, why can't the Discordians make these books last longer? So uhm, yes. The Order would definantly like peace to wage our war against the cabbage and brussel sprouts menaces, the greyface Core and the squid-hentai-thingy Nomads. Why doesn't this thing have the word for Nomads? Are everything considered evil just cabbages?
Uhm, so yeah. As a condition, the Order also would like to request full access to the Persephone. If you can give us an approximate area where you are, we can direct you to a suitable place to drydock and undergo our usual Anti-Nomad scrubbing. It was the cause of all this...dis...cord...I swear Jeremy owes me...if we can just take a good, hard look at it, the Order will be able to fully end this ridiculous feud we have with TAZ and hopefully return to the long and lasting friendship that never should have been severed.
You bring the handle, we got the blade. Let's bury the hatchet in the cabbage-faced.
Source: Skarsi Wyrdmake
SWyrdmake@Discord.BFN
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Signal Strength: Very Discordant
Encryption: 5 tons of Flax
Subject: Burying the cabbage.
Kallisti Rika.
After conversing with the other Popes, and communing with the Chao, we can acquiesce to the Order's request. Pope Brettonias will negotiate the finer details over secure fnord to fnord communications with you.
I must say, for a non-discordian you have a decent ability to commune with the Chao in understanding the fnord. While not up to the standard of the main Popehood, it's sufficient enough that i confer on you an honorary Popessness with the title of 'Flax Tongue'.Now, you can claim destruction of cabbages in the name of Eris and can gain acquaintance and assistance from other popes in the Sectors.
As a final note, the Brussel Sprout menace was annihilated many, many years ago by our founder Malaclypse so there is no need to worry. Once everything has settled, i shall travel to the Order's home and confer you with your robes and five tons of Flax to mark your ascension to the Popehood. You can use your titles right away though.