I made a pact with a devil, it backfired horribly. Caliban just got fed an insane amount of money for nothing. If it truly is Rebecca's money, it would just be another reason for her to kill me.
I wish I could just be angry at that soulless scammer and the dumb cow. But I guess all I can blame now is myself.
I want you in my life, Kris. I want to come back to Freeport 14, and be with you and Aspen and Yoshiko and Kimiko and Tamara and all the others. Hell, I would listen to Moyer's nonsense, Klugmann's politics and Relevant picking unnecessary fights all day, if that would be the price for returning and having all this trouble erased.
But I do not know if that is viable at all.
I wanted to vanish, either die or fake my death, take another new made-up name and just live in who-knows-where. Apparently, more and more people agree on me having just one talent, so I would do that to keep myself afloat. I even thought about joining the crew of a Cryer transport I flew escort with. The pilot is a nice woman. Seems like I am her type, too.
I am currently on New Berlin, at someone's home. Another nice woman. Not much of a talker, but kindhearted. I think she just wants some company, really.
I do not think I can stay here for long. I do not want to be a burden to her. She says I am not, and that she is just happy to help. But that does not make me feel better, either.
What is going to happen now? Do I come back to Freeport 14? I bet half of the people out there have heard about stuff because Caliban asked around. About my hobby, about Rebecca trying- or, uhm, having tried to murder me. I guess I should really not bother with building up a positive reputation anymore.
What happens now is entirely up to you. I still really want you to come back and spend so much time with you on that dingy little Freeport. Everyone misses you, and everything has been pretty much fixed back to the way it was. Hell, even Tammy wants to see you back in the parlor. You do NOT know how nosy that woman is. But still, in the end I turned out to be an alright middleman between you all.
Or... alternatively. I could pull some strings with my people. You are an affiliate under my direct endorsement, so like. That's gotta count for something. They can settle you with a new identity on a one-way ticket to a planet of your choosing, we can give you a new start at life. You can make a new neural net account and a new name. You can get a job, you can find an apartment. I can help you locate some good counseling or therapy, because it is good to get rid of all of your frustrations to a trained professional who can really help you. But think about this long and hard - there's no going back from this. Is it really worth it to delete Levan Harlow only to replace him with someone else? Just because of some disagreements we've already fixed together?
But don't quote me on this. This is usually offered to our direct family members to prevent the houses national security agencies from kidnapping or questioning them. I don't think this is handed out like candy, and I'm not even sure I can hand over this privilege. Besides, it would be no different than seeing you die. Especially over something so minor. But again - the choice is up to you. This is just a last resort type of deal.
And, the worst part is that... I couldn't bear knowing you're out there but forever beyond my reach for security reasons. That would be the worst.
Either way, I want you to know that Becca's calmed down a little. I've talked to her at length about it, and she simply does not care about this situation anymore. What she did is unforgivable, but you're safe now. I'll keep a close eye on her from now on.
Please let me know when you wish to be picked up, and I'll be there in a jiffy. Alright?
...neural.uplink detected...
...starting encryption...
...establishing connection...
identified: Lazurith
transmission point of origin: Citadel
current transmission has been successfully relayed to: 5 nodes with a delay of: 7 minutes ⚠ ERROR 0x000a1b - Recipient's long range transmission antenna is disconnected.
⚠ Cannot establish a direct communication with Recipient!
⚠ Relaying message to the nearest short-range transmission node...
⚠ Connection failed. Retrying...
⚠ Connection failed. Retrying...
⚠ Connection failed. Retrying...
⚠ New AUG-O-LE00 connection registered. Transmitting data to implant.
...TRANSLATING DATA...
Rebecca told me about their little adventures on Erie. I've been dead for three years and I still cannot believe Aspen of all people decided to repeatedly kick Liberty's not-so-provisional government of Erie in the gonads multiple times before leaving in a trail of smoke. God, I WISH I could have done something more fun instead of being a fucking popsicle!
Anyways. I'm really missing you over here already. I'm really sorry for snapping at you the other day, I don't know what's going on with me. I want to go back to talking to you two about all kinds of nonsense like the good old days. I want to see what you've done to the new Kay. And I do hope you've secured your emergency alternators this time, I don't want to lose you again.
Aspen is currently living with me. It was a little awkward at first, because, uhm. I, uhm. I showed her, uh, how, uhm, I am currently living. Uhm. Yeah. I introduced her to two friends of mine, and, uhm.
Uhm. Uhm, I do not know how to explain. Uhm. Uhm, maybe, uhm, I tell you later.
Anyway, she, uhm, is currently my co-pilot. We had our first flight together yesterday, which was, uhm, eventful, to say the least. The dickfaces Auxenia is working with were around at the Manhattan grid and immediately took a weirdly obsessive interest in Aspen, and, uhm, Yeah. Lots of smugglers around, lately, too.
We also went to Dublin, because I thought she could use a few good vibes. Naturally, that had to backfire, too, because the Hood got destroyed by Corsairs. She told me about her memories of racing with you there, and celebrating on the Hood. Even that is over now.
I let her take the controls of the Kay and she did one last, almost perfect lap through the race track - with a gunboat! We even had an audience!
Anway, Kristoff.
I am still waiting for you. Waiting for you to say "yes" instead of not saying that immediately when I asked the question. I was not lying when I said I will be waiting for you. Really. And, uhm, the Kay could use a third crew member. We kind of have a very neat dress code here, too. You should see how Aspen looks now. Not much of a nerd anymore, but a... very pleasant to look at woman! I think I managed to talk her out of fighting windmills and instead into trying to enjoy life. Her time down on Erie was a living nightmare. She deserves better, now.
And you do, too. You know my opinion on Revanent and the Technomancy. I know they are your family, and that you desperately want to impress them and prove them wrong. But I wonder how many times she needs to put your life at risk over stupid things like an Order pilot sitting at Freeport 14, not intending to leave. That really was the moment where I realized she just looks for pawns to do her bidding. When she tried to hire me to get rid of Empress, who literally just sat there in her little fighter. She did not want to sully her own hands. Why do that, when there are pawns on the board.
I really hope you understand that at some point, too. To the Technomancy, you are nothing but a pawn on the board.
I told you the Fort Bush Ballers would beat the Houston Rangers!
In fact, I not only won our bet but also one with Madeleine and Monique! We will go to the next game this weekend in Colorado and they need to wear outfits I choose for them.
I am still unsure whether to take the opportunity and let them wear something silly, or rather something naughty! Anyway, do you want to come, too, and watch the game live? I want to ask Aspen, too, but I do not know if she would actually like to join if you are not around. Like, would be a bit weird for her to be there on her own while I am there with Monique and Madeleine. Maybe I should invite a few other people from the den, too. But, uhm, I obviously want to hear your response first! Not sure if you like it when many people are around. I am actually not sure myself, now.
Anyway, tell me if you want to come! We can do other things afterwards, too!
Look, I know you are quite busy with your Technomancer stuff, but you could at least have replied.
I went to the game with Madeleine and Monique and it was quite fun! The Dusters got demolished! Monique bought me one of those funny giant foam hands and we almost got into a fight because we sat with the wrong team and Monique punched a guy, and then we left. She then punched another guy who tried to hit on her. Uhm, she was quite drunk.
She, uhm, punched a few more guys. Somehow she did not get herself hurt. I mean, she literally pushed a guy into a group of other guys. What a fun night!
We had to sleep in a hotel because I was too afraid she would punch more people on the way home. Then we stayed there for another night, and then we decided to give going to space another shot, so we went home, changed clothes and then I took them to Rheinland. I thought we could visit Aspen in Clown, so we went there and she is apparently not around right now. I thought she would be at this, uhm, Isengard Research Station. They have this cool racing track outside! No wonder she went here!
Anyway, give me some life signs! Maybe we can try the race track together!
From:____ ____LevanHarlow
To:___________Lazurith
Subject:______I still love you
I do not know why you cannot leave now.
I just do not understand you anymore. Nothing makes sense. All I can tell is that Relevant is not trustworthy at all, and you have to admit, looking at everything that happened today, it is more than obvious that she is a monster.
She contacts me out of nowhere, on a private channel, knowing I am out there. She tries to intimidate me, tries to silence me, commands me not to meet Silverstone, repeatedly keeps telling me that I paint myself as target if I do not comply. Then she says I will get watched. In that moment, red signatures show up on my scanners. Three or four, at max range. I confront her about it, they vanish. She denies having anything to do with that.
Lea did not know what I was talking about, but said herself she saw something purple in the distance. Relevant's color, you know that yourself!
Then, says "I need to get back to Rheinland anyhow", knowing I am there! How does she know, I ask you!? Of course she claims it was just a coincidence after I called her out on it. I am the one with the conspiracy theory, right?
Then you show up, with Rebecca, and she knows it. The first wave shows up, they focus on ME. I got hit by probably a hundred of those missile things? Lea almost lost all of her equipment. You yourself saw it, they were focusing the Kay!
Then, what a coincidence, Revanent shows up and right in that moment that big space fish appears and once again, goes for me! Hell, I have guncam footage of that! I am not crazy!
And then she insists that I leave the station! Tries to get me out of Clown, gets angry when I do the only logical thing and seek shelter at the battleship. And what happens? Nothing. They did not follow Lea and me. We were safe at the Altenburg. Funny, huh?
And you know what? Relevant left, and the thing was gone, too. So how am I not supposed to count one and one together? "Yeah, all those other people will be after you, totally not me." Shut up, cunt! She has been nothing but trouble. She wants to silence me? Fine. But I have you know, she was the one that lead me to the space fish... thing in Inverness. When you and Gestalt talked to those... obviously alien guys.
Why is there an alien thing in Inverness? Why is the Valoran Citadel so close to it? Why do these things show up when Relevant is around? Iron Brawler said it himself, Technomancers were around in Sigma-15 when he got attacked by the Wild. Why? Why!?
And just when I try to understand all this, and listen to the random stuff she mumbles on the group frequency - I am not sure if she knew I was still listening - all attention gets redirected to Caliban allegedly shooting himself.
I... need time to understand all of this. Maybe I am wrong, but... this is painfully obvious. Spin it how you want it, she is the biggest threat to me now. I do not know how she does it, but... she has her ways. Does that sound so much more crazy than zombies and ghost women?
Anyway. Aspen wants to talk to me. About all of this.
I... want to trust you, Kristoff, but you... need to get away from her. Come to me, be with me. She is a monster, and you know that. I do not understand why you are so attracted to horrible women.