"There are times, however, and this is one of them, when even being right feels wrong. What do you say, for instance, about a generation that has been taught that rain is poison and sex is death? If making love might be fatal and if a cool spring breeze on any summer afternoon can turn a crystal blue lake into a puddle of black poison right in front of your eyes, there is not much left except TV and relentless masturbation. It's a strange world. Some people get rich and others eat **** and die."
"If you were my husband I would poison your coffee." - Unknown female
"Madam, if you were my wife, I would drink it." - Winston Churchill in reply to said female
"You sir, are drunk." - Another unknown female
"And you madam, are fat, but in the morning I will be sober." - Again, Winston Churchill in reply