ID: Officer John Aryn.
[color=#FFCC66] Target: LPI. Current Location: Planet Manhattan. Priority: Low. Subject: The recruit.
[color=blue]
Due to the low quality guncam provided by the recruit about part of his patrols,I am contacting you to confirm he has indeed patrolled with me several times. I am aware that he is now ranked as officer,this transmission is only to confirm his data and help filling the proper documentation.
Aryn over and out.
A fat, balding man who looks to be in his forties staggers into the promotion office with a wide, disturbingly perverse grin, wearing what is clearly a woman's LPI uniform. The name tag on the uniform, (which does not fit properly, thus showing a large hairy beer gut) reads "Pippa wass"
Sender: Deputy Chief Colin Sinclair Location: Red Deer II, Alberta Subject:Re: Promotion Request, Pippa Wass
Let's... see. Everything checks out but one single thing that has been nagging me for the last week - you haven't actually said anything about what you're applying for. So...
...Recruit Undercover Sergeant's Secretary should do nicely.
That'd make for a nice vessel rank identifier, at least.
*sighs*
Congratulations on the promotion, Officer. And go get a <strike>name</strike> <strike>uniform</strike> <strike>hair style</strike> <strike>age</strike> <strike>sex change</strike> <strike>personal hygiene product</strike> <strike>shave</strike> shower. You're confusing the record system. And me. The file I've got on you here is telling me that you're 28 and "slightly chubby, but well built". Now, I guess that's not entirely false if you compare yourself to the rest of the Liberty Police, but still - well-built?
-Colin Sinclair, Deputy Chief of the Liberty Police, Inc.
//EDIT: Sorry. Firefox seems to hate me today - feel free to delete the extra copies if anyone sees this. Looks like my posts were getting posted even though the only thing I got in return was an error message.
Sender: Deputy Chief Colin Sinclair Location: Red Deer II, Alberta Subject:Re: Promotion!
I've been considering this for quite a while now - you applying and fulfilling all the requirements for promotion just makes me even more convinced that this is the right decision to make. We need more people that can serve as good examples for our Officers, especially the newcomers to the force.
So, consider it done, Sergeant John Aryn.
Accepted
-Colin Sinclair, Deputy Chief of the Liberty Police, Inc.