SENDER:Sirius Entsorgung RECIPIENTS:OPEN CHANNEL LOCATION:Wichter Station, Sigma-15; Wuppertal Refinery, Cologne; Belvedere Refinery, New London SUBJECT:Cleaning up Sirius the right way!
The camera pans across a warehouse full of green, glowing goop, while eerie music plays. In the distance, there is a faint light from an office overseeing the disaster. A slightly overweight man in overalls, with sweat and stain streaks and a five-o'clock shadow stares mournfully at his communicator. He mumbles "No... the boss will have my head for this... whatever will I do!" Suddenly, the man spots a flyer, half hidden by anti-union propaganda on the office pegboard, and the music turns into corporate jazz. The colors are bright green and grey. "Of course!" the man shouts, grabbing the flyer, and scanning the text with a fake smile plastered on his face as he makes a call.
The narrator's voice is gravelly, with a hint of accent. He says, "When your refining process encounters an unforeseen disruption, only safety precautions can help you stay operational. But if the error has already been made, you still have one option left." The scene shows a competent team in environmental suits, operating a loader and cleaning out the last of the previously seen warehouse, with the foreman beaming in the background. The logos on their breast pockets display a recycling symbol, all in green. "Our waste disposal experts will turn your worst industrial nightmare into just another day on the job. With only a single call, an experienced team will be dispatched to the site of the accident, with our competent transportation crews soon to follow." The camera pans to a station window, which shows a brick-like shape performing a breaking burn towards a mooring structure.
The camera zooms in on the clean-up team leader, who exits the warehouse airlock onto the observation deck, and takes off his helmet. He looks like a stereotype of an old-time mechanic. Looking straight at the camera, he says "Sirius Entsorgung: our plan - keeping Sirius shpick and shpan!"
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The camera pans across a docking bay where a man in carefully neutral corporate uniform is angrily berating a dejected dockmaster. In the background, two large warehouse doors are bulging out, with green goo seeping out from underneath. Their argument becomes indistinct, and we turn back to the airlock. The gravely voice man says, "During the refining process, the biggest mistake is not taking care of the details. Where your warehouses could be full of Silver ore, zey are drowning in waste." The camera pans to a neighboring airlock, where a team of Waste Disposal Experts is gearing up to board the station. "Our crews are old hands at dealing with industrial clean-ups of any capacity. Let them take the Waste off your shoulders."
The crew moves forward, and the camera fades to black. Once it returns, the corporate captain and the dockmaster are standing awkwardly, looking at the camera, while a SEO crewmember stands nearby. They shake hands, and then all three intone in an off key chorus - "Sirius Entsorgung, cleaning up Sirius the right way!"
A bunch of legalese quickly scrolls below a toll-free neural net node contact code. Among the details, you see the basic contract: