Comm ID: Brakelatabasaasta
Transmit to: Brakelatabasaasta
Before the beginning, there was this turtle. And the turtle was alone. And he looked around. And he saw his neighbor. Which was his mother. Who was actually an oak tree. Which grew all day, and then fell over. Like a bridge. And lo, under the bridge there came a Catfish! And he was very big. And he was walking. And he was the biggest he had seen. And I swear I'm not making any of this up at all.
Some other stuff happened then, too, but folks tend to disagree on most of it. The important part is this:
I did some stuff today. And the day before that, too. And I'm gonna talk about it again.
Yesterday, I met a person flying one of them Mammo-Wedge ships. She was kind of quiet. As in, she was really quiet. Because I don't think she could talk. But she still communicated n' stuff! We quickly got the formalities out of the way (Like, "Are you a person-thing or a not-person-thing" and "What's twelve by pies") and then we just kind of sat in an awkward silence for a bit. Or an awkward pause. I think some of her Relatives flew past us, too, but I wasn't sure. They all seemed to be a part of the Undead Serpent Industries club. Eventually she got up and left, though. And I was alone.
[*USI*]Cape.Coral[T]: *She looks around nervously, then waves farewell* Brakelatabasaasta: Oh okay! Bye!
Later on, though, I saw some more of her relatives, and asked them about their SuPeR SeCrEt cLuB!!!!!
[*USI*]R.Price[R]: Good day sir. Brakelatabasaasta: Are you guys part of a secret club? Do you have a treehouse? [*USI*]A.Teshurr.: Aye Brakelatabasaasta: Wow! [*USI*]A.Teshurr.: Land on Trenton, you can see it. Brakelatabasaasta: What kinds of bells and whistles does it have? [*USI*]A.Teshurr.: All of them. Brakelatabasaasta: Like, a drawbridge? Brakelatabasaasta: Does it have a refrigerificator machine? [*USI*]R.Price[R]: A few actually. Brakelatabasaasta: Man. So lucky.
Later on in the day, I found that quiet one again sitting around with a Tinyman in an itty-bitty-pointy-ship.
Brakelatabasaasta: Hi hi, Tinyman! Brakelatabasaasta: So do you two know each other? Styx: Of course. We're married. Brakelatabasaasta: Oh how wonderful and totally believable! Brakelatabasaasta: Where do you two live? Brakelatabasaasta: Do you have any kids? Brakelatabasaasta: Any family pets? Brakelatabasaasta: When's your anniversary? Brakelatabasaasta: Where did you go on your honeymoon? Brakelatabasaasta: How do you put bread on the table? Styx: No kids. Doctor gave me news, one bad, one good. Good news, my crotch cancer is cured because my engines leaked radiations. Styx: Bad news, my gonads are dried as pirate's throat now. Brakelatabasaasta: Aha. Radiation is the cure to all sicknesses! You hear that, Mister Price? Brakelatabasaasta: Go irradiate yourself! [*USI*]R.Price[R]: I walked into a weird comm chat....
Every now and then his wife made a noise or something, so she kinda sorta contributed to the conversation. The Tinyman said she was busy or something, and that's why she wasn't talking. But she relayed to me that she just didn't talk at all. So I don't know what was up with that. Eventually we got on the subject of my piñata-dropper.
Styx: How's that nuke mine launcher working for you, Brakelatabasaasta? Brakelatabasaasta: Oh! I forgot I had that. See, I used it once because... um. Why was it again? I think I thought it was a piñata-dispenser. Brakelatabasaasta: But then it ran out of piñatas. Brakelatabasaasta: And It just kinda sits there now. Styx: That strangely sounds about right. Brakelatabasaasta: I didn't get much candy from them, though. Brakelatabasaasta: Except this one time. Brakelatabasaasta: A guy hit the piñata with his entire ship, and lots'a candy came out! Brakelatabasaasta: I don't think the ship came out of it alive, though. Styx: That also sounds about right. [*USI*]A.Teshurr.: That's a shame.
And then there was this Washguy who was talkin' with the Undead Serpent Industries guy, and they were either going to the Tenth Freeportplace or to deliver ponies to a Shetlandplace. I don't remember. I didn't really know what they were talking about.
After a bit more floating around aimlessly, I got tired and went back to my dumpsterhome. I spent the entire night catching up on the "Freeport" movie series so I could figure out what everyone was talking about. The original "Freeport" was pretty good, and "Freeport 2: Electric Boogaloo" was also alright. I couldn't find the third movie at the rental place, though. "Freeport 4: The Freeport Revisited" was okay-ish, but it really didn't follow along with the story of the first two. I guess I'm probably missing some key plot details from whatever the third movie is. And "Freeport 5: The Freeport Ultimatum" ties it all together nicely and answers a lot of the questions that were dangled in front of us as early as the first movie. And that's as far as I've got. It's not a bad series, I suppose. But every good story needs to have a definite end, and since the producers are making so much money off of the franchise, I'm willing the bet they'll carry it at least as far as "Freeport 20". It can only go downhill from here.
The next day (which is to say, this day), I went back to the spaceyplace and met a whole lot of other people there! There was a Space-Hobo (Or "Spobo", of you will), and a Liberty Secret-Face man, and a few Freelancey-types in a bunch of different ships.
And then along came a Pleeceman.
Brakelatabasaasta: Hey pleeceman! Brakelatabasaasta: Whatcha' pleecin'? Tavish.Degroot: Are you talking to me? Brakelatabasaasta: Yup yup. SirLagsalot: Place-man? What the hell does that even mean? Brakelatabasaasta: PLEECEMAN. Brakelatabasaasta: He's a pleeceman. Tavish.Degroot: Do you have some problem with spelling police or what? Brakelatabasaasta: Nope. I think YOU have a problem. With... Brakelatabasaasta: Being a proper pleeceman. Tavish.Degroot: Why that? Brakelatabasaasta: Because you said pleeceman wrong! Tavish.Degroot: I spell police how I like Tavish.Degroot: And its none of your business
And then, um... uh oh. I'm gonna have to wrap this up quickly, and there's still so much more to talk about! But the Catfish is on his way now. Not much time. Speed-time GO.
I met a Flatbread Zoney-person and she talked with that other guy about stuff.
There was discussion about whether or not she was a Discordio-mabob, and I compared all of us to various quadrilateral shapes. Washguy insisted on being a three-dimensional object, but I wouldn't let him. Also we discovered that fiddler crabs are like a bazillion times better than coconut crabs.
Then a Hackyman came and was very obvious about being a Hackyman doing Hackythings.
Brakelatabasaasta: Hi Hackyman! Juichi_Lancing: Hey
He was kind of not very bright. Navypeople stopped him. Then another person happened.
Brakelatabasaasta: Psst! Ageiraperson! I'm following you! Brakelatabasaasta: Where ya goin'? Ageira|Saraghrar: Who, me? Brakelatabasaasta: Yeah yeah!
But then they went into a magic-metal-shiny-claw and I couldn't follow. So I went back toward the Planet-place and saw some other familiar people.
Brakelatabasaasta: Oh it's you guys again! Hi! [*USI*]Cape.Coral[T]: *she waves* Brakelatabasaasta: And bye!
And then a guy:
Brakelatabasaasta: Hi hi, Person! Ozei.Ruousha: Heya! Ozei.Ruousha: And... Crud... Darned Kishiro! Brakelatabasaasta: Oh no! That place-thing is all like making lightshows at you! Ozei.Ruousha: Seems so! Must land elsewhere! Brakelatabasaasta: Bye! Ozei.Ruousha: Later!
And another:
Brakelatabasaasta: Hi bye. Perlence: ! Brakelatabasaasta: !
And then a lightshow with some people. I talked fishtalk with a fishtalker.
Brakelatabasaasta: Oh wow. Brakelatabasaasta: Stuff. Be.Good.At.It: Jimmy: Yer, but not many fish. Brakelatabasaasta: Oh, that's alright. To see a True Fish is a very rare occurance. I wouldn't expect to see many more than one every week or so. Be.Good.At.It: Jimmy: Wot? Ah see fish all da time. Brakelatabasaasta: No way! Where? Be.Good.At.It: Jimmy: Lotsa 'em in California. Brakelatabasaasta: What kind of fish? What sizes? Brakelatabasaasta: Are they REALLY True Fish? Be.Good.At.It: Jimmy: Yer. True fish. Small fish, green fish. Red fish, even some blue ones. Be.Good.At.It: Jimmy: Actually not many green ones. Dey're illegal here and all. Crystal.Dawn: Aye, very. Not very welcome ya might say.. Brakelatabasaasta: Are any of them wearing fedoras? Be.Good.At.It: Jimmy: Now an' den. Crystal.Dawn: Sometimes Brakelatabasaasta: Like, multiple fedoras? as in, two or more fedoras on a single fish? Be.Good.At.It: Jimmy: Well no, Crystal.Dawn: *chuckles* Be.Good.At.It: Jimmy: The people inside the fish wear fedoras sometimes. Brakelatabasaasta: Oh oh! Well that can work.
But then the fishtalker had to leave, and the lightshow ended with some piñata-a'splosions, and I went back home to watch "Freeport 6: The Legend of Curly's Gold". It wasn't very good.
Now it's time to hide from the Catfish. Quiet-time now. Shh.
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