To the Muppets

[arvg]

To: [color=#FFFFFF]Kermit and his band of merry miscreants
Comm. ID: Commissar Leon Mendel
Priority: HIGH
Subject: Orkutsk Facility

---Communications Opened---

Comrades!

Yet again I have to commend the idiocy of our Glorious fighter corps. Brilliant, men, not only are you as dense as two planks of wood, but you have the mental capacity of a crushed gnat I hit with my shoe.

Orkutsk Citadel is an IND facility in our space, they are our guests. It is not a Coalition base... meaning that your drunk behinds are to stay away from the secretaries on that station... yes I am aware that they use make up and shave more than once a year... but Volgograd's women have child bearing hips, get and do your duty producing more little soldiers for the Coalition's war machine... many of you have yet to fulfill your Child quota for the year... yes I am looking at you Forge... and you Rhade. I am aware that it is nice and cosey in that closet the pair of you are shacked up in, but really, try as hard as you like, you two will never have a baby together.

Back around to the rest of the rules concerning the IND facility.

While on the station you may not access the Neural Net entertainment grids... the State sanctioned entertainment programs have been cleared by Minitrue, such as the ever popular "Learn about Quantity surveying" and "Arranging the blocks" and of course the ever popular children's game show "shoot the fascist"

Shows such as "LA:Babewatch" and "Three busty Ninja's of Kusari" are not sanctioned and sow sedition in our ranks... and should be avoided at all costs.

Above all, you idiots need to remember that while on Orkutsk you are on an IND facility... act like officers... please stop drinking the contents of Otis Jethro's liquor cabinets and then peeing in the solid gold fountain... there is no need for the water to be golden as well...

Now get your fat behinds back to work... and Forge... Helga is awaiting you on Volgograd for your re-population duty. Try to remember not to cry this time.

For the Hope of the Future!
Leon Mendel
Commissariat of Public Relations

---Communications Terminated--

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