A difficult to bear burden

[Sangria]

A difficult to bear burden

29 Jan 820 A.S.

It is now exactly two months ago after the incident that had happened on Cambridge. Two long months for Nancy as the guilt feeling she felt every since didn't seem to be leaving her, no matter what she had tried. Maybe he was the lack of people that actually wanted to help her out that also added to this guilt, or maybe it was just her asking the wrong people.

She had asked a Bretonian 'friend' to give her the list of families that had fallen victim to this 'slip-up' she called it. The last she heard from him however was that he'd try his best, that being more than a month ago already and she never had the list from him.

The feeling of being unable to make up to those victims nibbled on her longer, and to try and get rid of this guilt feeling she went directly to the Bretonian Armed Forces, talking her way into eventually saying that she was the one responsible to for the attacks, this already revealing her identity to Bretonia as Nancy Sweetwater being Sangria.

Her name being linked to the Reavers and the colour Sangria was something she had been trying to evade for a long time. But she didn't care about that any more. However her coming out with the story made her bring her parents into safety. With the excuse of treating them a holiday she sent them to planet Curacao. And besides a few phone calls she tried to keep any contact to a minimum. Afraid her dad would find out about her life as a Reaver, something she always had concealed from them.

The Bretonian Armed Forces didn't give her the list of names either, which didn't come as a surprise. Why would Bretonia give out the names of the victims to the one that had caused the loss of them.

Still without a list she continued to look for ways to find the list, even though it was already published to the public, getting her hands on it without getting noticed it was her asking for it was something different. And finding a way to make up with the victims to erase the guilt feeling was something else as well.

* * *

She carried on working as a Reaver, being occupied with leading the Company into the directions she considered right. To try suppress the guilt she threw herself only harder into her work, not really caring for any dangers either. Taking bigger risks to give herself in a way some kind of punishment, may everything she was doing backfire on her.

While doing her work she had decided to try out something new in a area she had barely worked. Only really remembering it from a friend that had showed her around on one of her very first Mandalorian days. She also knew the place somewhat due to the Companies relation with the Hessians.

To go and investigate in the area she arranged a meeting with the Rheinland Military, it didn't really go as planned as she was too late and missed the person she had really wanted to talk to. Maybe it was her being lucky as a lower ranked member of the Military was willing to hear her out. Major Theodor von Sittlingen.

The talks with Rheinland soon leaded to a new contract for the Reavers and an additional source of income for hunting Libertonian assets. The Hessians however almost spoiled her game as some things had leaked out. She could only enjoy this however, liking the extra rush as she played with the Companies Relationships of certain factions.

All turned quiet again however and she managed to pull out a contract almost fully to her taste with the Rheinland Military, this mostly due to her Rheinland contact, which was still the Major. She also dared to discuss non-business related subjects, one of them being the act she had performed on Cambridge. In the end the Major offered his help and got her the list of names. Once she had studied the list a solution came to mind on how she perhaps could repay these people.

From her savings, which was way too much money for her own to spent either way, she planned to pay the victims of the incident. After talking to another friend about it, she arranged a way to get the money where she wanted in a indirect way. Not wanting her name on the money when it would reach these people as she thought it might not be appreciated that way.

She made a deposit of quiet a few millions of credits to her friends account so that he'd be able to give the money to a fund of the Grandchester attacks.

* * *

Even with the deposit made she still didn't feel like she made up properly, telling herself she would at least have to see or hear the reactions of these people, hoping the money would cheer them up and somewhat make it possible for them to get over what happened. She didn't have high hopes though as she was told that 'nothing would replace these lives, no matter what.'

Either way she had to move on, and she did. Pushing herself into her work even though it had it's personal tints to it. Hanging out with the Major from Rheinland every now and then to have a good time chatting. And once she heard he was reported MIA she was one of the first to head out and try to find him. Ignoring to even meet up with a close friend of her she'd often fly with as a wingmen.

She managed to locate the major in the radiation fields on Omega-11. Him being in a badly damaged wraith that had the ejection pod stuck, making it impossible for the Major to escape as the engines were also friend. A hasty rescue operation was put into place and with her Aurochs she managed to board the Wraith and pull the Major from the wreckage, which exploded moments later just when they were leaving.

The Major was lucky and only had to spent a few days on the battleship Karlsruhe to recover from the injuries, one of which was a metal piece that had pierced his side. After a visit at his bed she told him he deserved some days off, and talked him into coming with her to Gallia. Having planned a holiday, and once approved of the Admiral and the Major recovered properly they both, Nancy and Theo moved out to Gallia.

* * *