How about when you get destroyed ... you return to flying a starflea. But instead of having no money ... the insurance company places 75% of the value of the ship and equipment you had when you were destroyed in your bank.
This would replace that 4 hour no re-engagement rule since you'd kinda have to go through the process of buying and equipping your ship all over again. And you'd have to do a few missions or run some cargo to gain the 25% you need to get the same setup you had before (unless of course you already had the 25% value already before you got the insurance money).
#1 - this is more realistic
#2 - alleviates the concern for those who like to re-engage despite the rules (translate to less need for violation reports)
#3 - forces PVP whores to role play rather than just kill kill kill
#4 - when someone is about to die ... they'll likely try to escape than lose their ship
#5 - traders would be less likely to say "I'd rather die than pay" (translate to more role play among traders)