Hey... future me. Today was a rather... I don't know. The day started great and just developed into... garbage. Several people insulted me today for my stuttering. Sometimes I wish I would not stutter, but some actually like me the way I am. I am not feeling great today, Future-Cherry, not at all. I don't know what I shall do. Jaina, Caz, Buck, and all the others who like me how I am probably don't want me to change. But... can I withstand all the insults and hate towards me? I don't know if I am strong enough. It just feels like my childhood is repeating itself. One of them even called me... 'Stuttering Meat' while that Silverstone guy insulted my stuttering first, just to then call me a 'cutie'. I wish they would all just... disappear. Forever. I don't like... violence but... Sometimes I just wish that all the people who try to hurt me physically and mentally... just disappear. I hate them so much... I know it is wrong to wish other people harm but... I just hate when they insult me because of my stuttering. I have nothing against people who ask because I can explain it to them but... the moment they just call me out for it and... insult me, is too much for me.
Maybe I should do something against my stuttering? What would you say? But... then I would change myself too much. I wouldn't be myself anymore, I would be someone else. Do you think that is the right way? I am not sure. Jaina and the others would... hate me for it. I will think about it, but I am not sure... I can't even write correctly because of my insecurity and my sadness today... I am sorry Future-Cherry. Goodnight...
