A former Zoner scientist and engineer, son of Leeds, who had found his place amongst the clouds of Crow and Edge, where crucial events of his life happened. Short information about this person is given as follows:Full name: Roman Alexson
Gender: male
Date of birth: 801 A.S.
Talented, despite of his age. Not possessing high skill in space combat but is a convenient pilot. Lost contact with his relatives when Leeds blockade occurred. By that time he was at Namura, S-59.
A reasonThe moment when his former life had started to ruin was marked by increasing ticking sound. Roman was escaping the place which all of sudden became a closed field with a mysterious energy torrent swirling inside. The place surrounding Freeport 11 became absent of communications and deadly silent when residents felt the presence of something not belonging to a human world. A presence of a being, from absolutely another, higher level of evolution development then them all.
His face was covered with cold sweat and his heart was beating heavily against his chest. Roman was checking monitors and occasionally trying to look behind the shoulder, forgetting that he won't see anything at that angle from his Eagle. Ticking sound was decreasing as the distance between him and the source was growing up, but the echo still remained in his head, making him nervous and stressed.
He was surrounded by a silence from the communicator, occasional beeps incoming from internal systems and by his own heavy breathing. He was afraid at looking at his faint reflection in the glass, he must have been looking really bad and the atmosphere of solitude, enhanced by radio silence was making him afraid even more. In desperation he attempted to silently hum a song to draw his attention away from recent panic, but his shaking voice sounded distant and unfamiliar to himself and he stopped, leaving himself feeling even more uneasy.
For some time Roman was navigating through the asteroid field, attempting to calm himself down, numerous thoughts were running through his mind: "What was that?", "How did such happen?", "Is everything fine with people left behind?", "Should I have left?". He struggled to think about the further action he should take, and he just remained drifting in the nebulae, thinking what to do next, as just all of sudden he realized that the sound in his head remained and was slowly increasing in its intensity.
His face instantly turned pale, even more sweat showed up on his forehead and unpleasant feelings appeared in his stomach. The sound slowly from ticking started turning into devastating periodical clatter, muting the sound of working systems, his breath, his thoughts, and eventually even his scream...
His mind exploded following with a blackout, conscious regain, extreme headache and shock. His body was failing him, the clutter was intense, like if somebody was knocking his helmet with tens of hammers, causing agony and mental trauma.
Numerous attempts to take the helmet off followed by the knocking his head against the console till he vomited and gave into blackout once again... But his unconsciousness was not a salvation.
He was somewhere, still sensing the pain, still hearing the echo of noise, which was tearing apart his ears and cracking asunder his skull, out there in the reality.
The bright light struck his eyes blinding his vision, the heat from everywhere was burning his skin, and he could not neither close his eyelids nor cover himself from heat.
An unknown force started dragging him forward to the horizon and he felt that heat increases and the wing carries strong smell of burnt flesh and hair, and a distant shredded grumbling sound induced by endless flames far away.
He was at the edge, but he could not loose his conscious neither die here. He could not refuse this nightmare, he could not even scream. What he was is just a sense, a spectator in a hell.
A white line on the horizon started to grow with intensifying of the cacophony of voices of those who were given into eternal torment... A bit closer and he saw them
Endless figures exposed to flames, which were growing from their backs, melting their fat and slowly turning them into ashes.
Empty black eyes, large holes where the mouthes should be, endless sources of scream and agony outvoicing the roar of fire; bodies covered in ember and blood blisters. Male, female, children, elders... They all were facing him and Roman felt the torments of each and everyone of them becoming his own. He still could not scream.
By unknown reason he thought that those were Leeds victims, victims of war and injustice, victims, who once were his family, his friend, his neighbors, his fellows.
There were millions of burning souls, far more then it actually was, far more than he could bear in his mind, far too many for him to exist in his mute agony.
If he wakes up now, he will immediately die.
Suddenly, the vision faded into darkness and he remained exposed to the void. The silence was so extreme after mind-breaking cacophony that Roman felt himself turned inside out.
He sensed gentle whisper behind him, there were nothing when he looked back, but slowly a pair of violet glowing eyes appeared and enormous humanoid face rendered from the darkness before him.
K'Hara|Nergal: **..'yours' weak minded ~human kin~ suffors with "ease" ./. "Laughable as it is" 'ours' is joy..**
And then he fainted, completely, ceasing his agony and gaining so wanter relief.
Five days later, Heisenberg, Koeln, Rheinland
Roman rubbed his eyes and opened them. he was surprised to find out that his vision returned back to him. He looked around and found himself in his Eagle, apparently docked as he could hear noise of bay works from outside. His glass was in a shutter mode and so nothing could be seen from outside neither from inside. Entire cockpit was lightened by a small light blob at the top.
About a week has already passed since that encounter but he still clearly recalls almost every detail of his torture... But what was after that remained in his memory as a series of blackouts, shattered phrases and a weird vision of unexplained light flash, but he had bad times recalling details
Roman touched his stomach, the pain was gone. This, alongside with his suddenly returned ability to see, gave him a thought that it was already big enough to maintain his internal wounds, and by the hunger he felt upon wake up he guessed that it was demanding food.
He picked one of the sealed provision packs that he was given by Erika and started consuming its content. He felt calm and a bit absent by that time.
With time passing day by day he was sitting in his Eagle, gladly no one disturbed him, and Roman had a hunch that Erika's authority played its role. He was there, sleeping, seeing nightmares, consuming food and water, patiently waiting for something to happen, something, that would give him an idea that it is about the time to leave and obey his new masters.
Roman knew barely nothing about them, mostly rumors, but his intuition didn't fail him in all the previous guesses on his subject.
His mental trauma was stabilized by re-configured hormonal and nutrition flow in his brain, day by day he felt less absence and memory loss, even his nightmares were slowly fading into something abstract.
He saved his mind. As this thought ran across his mind he smiled. He could live and sense the world in its full beauty for a little more time.
This was the reason for him to accept it. To accept his new life.
Roman didn't hesitate to do so. Even though that he accepted the way of those who broke, displaced his mind and barely killed him, he knew that this was the only option, the opportunity given by them. Why? He didn't know.
The only thing he was afraid of is its awakening. He was waiting for it with fear and desperation as he thought that eventually it will take his place in his mind, violently use him and his memories and cause something like the agony he felt before.
How would he meet the being inside of him? How would it meet him? Will he be able to supplicate it to let him remain a personality? Would it listen, would it ever hear him? The only thing he had to do to find this out was waiting, patiently, day by day, feeding it as it grows up and doing his best to serve it and hope for understanding.
StagesRoman awoke in cold sweat. Something was causing spasms all over his body and nausea, it was hard to breath and coordinate his moves.
Before he managed to attempt something, pain struck his back and lower body making him passing out immediately.
....
He was half-awake. He was seeing himself lying on the console again, his right arm was before his face. Roman tried to push himself against the panel to sit straight but in amusement found out that he does not feel his body neither he can blink or take a breath. He actually heard own slow breathing somewhere around, surrounding him like a sound in a room, and in between of that his heart was beating distantly.
Suddenly his hand shook and fingers made grabbing movement. Roman was watching it, not being adequate enough to think about what is going on. Fingers on his hand stiffened and relaxed couple of times, then the image started fading into white. A hand has made an awkward movement towards the eyes (Roman saw it as a screen in before of himself), and lubberly closed the eyelids one by one. The picture turned black.
....
Roman felt himself again. Strong pain left some call-backs in his body and the eyes were full of tears which were dropping from his nose onto the console. He felt salty taste in his mouth. He returned into his chair and rubbed his face, then he switched on the communication device and sourced video thread at his screen, looking at himself.
....
His hunger ceased and he didn't consume provision in such immense amounts as all the days before. The nightmares he was still suffering after the horrible encounter converted into abstractions which didn't cause any stress and his sleep returned to normal. He was still occasionally making unconscious movements which he could not control. Sometimes he felt his heartbeat suddenly changes or turns arrhythmic, causing him discomfort.
....
Unconscious movements stopped not so much time ago and he didn't experience neither cardiac malfunctions nor sudden blackouts. Everything seemed to return into his usual state and he felt himself fine. But one thing still was bothering him, and, despite of a late hour he couldn't help himself gain sleep. Instead his mind was full of thought about everything that happened to him, about all the recent changes and encounter with person closely related to Briggs. If only he could, he'd gladly accept any help and return back to his new home at Freeport 11, but he could not risk them more than he already did.
A man, who has lost many fellows and suffers mental pain and issues whenever a contact occurs, and a lady who is so desperate that she have decided to remain here, and alongside with him meet his new masters. Her motives remained unknown to him, probably she will show them later, but what would happen to a person who knows the truth about him and is not intended to save oneself? Is it really impossible to avoid fatal fate for those? Is it really no way to run?
....
Roman suddenly found out that with his thoughts he was carried away into a dream. Usually he spectates them apathetically but from the recent times he gained an ability to realize himself while asleep.
This time it was a complete darkness just like that time when Nergal encountered him in his mind (which Roman didn't remember). A very distant ticking sound appeared. Roman turned around but failed to detect the direction of the source, it seemed to be everywhere but very far at the same time. He walked couple of steps before he realized that there is a hard surface under his feet.
Sound intensified, atmosphere started turning heavy and viscous, transmitting the resonating sound directly into his mind. The fibre of surrounding space became stressed like if two charged with electricity bodies were being moved towards each other, generating strict force field in between.
The stress reached its top when out of void before him, from the deformed and twisted black space started forming a figure. Its shape was resembling a humanoid, a long robe was covering everything but its hands and white-pale face, which almost glowed in the total darkness. And Roman stood still looking at it as his head was getting heavier and powers were leaving his imaginary body...
At the last moment sound reached its aphelion as the figure raised its right hand towards him, floating closer and closer, until its white finger touched his forehead.
![[+]](/forums/images/collapse_collapsed.png "[+]")
Formatting and feedback![[Image: sun_of_agony_800px_by_roal_yr-d919ikx.png]](http://orig12.deviantart.net/1063/f/2015/195/6/b/sun_of_agony_800px_by_roal_yr-d919ikx.png)
![[Image: burning_800px_by_roal_yr-d919vz9.png]](http://orig06.deviantart.net/1c8a/f/2015/195/3/f/burning_800px_by_roal_yr-d919vz9.png)
![[Image: glowing_vision_by_roal_yr-d919lb5.png]](http://orig08.deviantart.net/b580/f/2015/195/c/6/glowing_vision_by_roal_yr-d919lb5.png)
![[Image: me_by_roal_yr-d91a78l.png]](http://orig00.deviantart.net/18f6/f/2015/195/d/a/me_by_roal_yr-d91a78l.png)
![[Image: blind_by_roal_yr-d910npk.png]](http://orig12.deviantart.net/febc/f/2015/193/d/2/blind_by_roal_yr-d910npk.png)
![[Image: figure1_by_roal_yr_d8pl375_by_roal_yr-d91o0pd.png]](http://orig12.deviantart.net/c0cf/f/2015/198/7/2/figure1_by_roal_yr_d8pl375_by_roal_yr-d91o0pd.png)
![[Image: vision_by_roal_yr-d91ucm9.png]](http://pre14.deviantart.net/3a8f/th/pre/f/2015/199/d/a/vision_by_roal_yr-d91ucm9.png)
![[Image: untitled_drawing_by_roal_yr-d9z4hss.png]](http://orig02.deviantart.net/4036/f/2016/106/5/2/untitled_drawing_by_roal_yr-d9z4hss.png)