Hello world!! - Ah who am I kidding? I'm recording inside a Falcon all alone. I don't even know why I'm doing this.
This day was just crap. I went all the way from New York to the Omicrons only to be intercepted by a cultist which is now probably dead. Hell, I was so desperate for money that I almost accepted the dude's job on the spot. I'm so glad I didn't. He asked me to murder bretonians for a fee! I crack computers not human skulls!
And then it got even better. THE ORDER! HURR DURR! Yeah, it wasn't any Agent you'd get shot at instantly as the media says. Still - she acted like a god throwing dirt on her servants; the servant is apparently me. Lost my load of Nomad Remains that I could've used to get some cash in the process...eh. On the other hand, she got in conflict with the Commune guy - yeah, the cultists call themselves "Commune". He even got hired me to kill the Agent. Me? Able to fight a Spec-Ops pilot? I'd be lucky to hit a planet's atmosphere at point-blank! It got even better, though. The Cultist turned out to praise Nomads or something? Or sympathize with them. I stepped back and waited until the sparks turned into a fire. The two ended up fighting since they got tired of talking. It peaked my attention that the Commune dude mentioned he had "crucial data". So I...as a smart fella, waited until he got shot down and nabbed whatever hardware I could. the important parts are intact but... it is all encrypted as hell. Who even looks something like this that hard? I have two choices: Sell the encrypted hardware back to the cultists or try to unlock it myself and sell the data to the highest bidder. Honestly, I sound more and more with a Lane Hacker...am I one? Nah. Those guys are pros, I am an amateur. I might pick the first option though...what if those guys can ask huge Nomads to infect me or god forbid shoot me and my ship down to an atomic level?! Can't risk that. Apparently he - or the Order - preferred this job as "Adoption". I don't like that. It sounds like ET trying to abduct humans for his experiments.
Two entire years passed since the last log...damn. I came a long way since that mess in the Omicrons, haven't I... - though now I'm knee deep in feces. Ever since I got my hands on these cool trinkets I've always had someone tailing me. The MND and Rheinland Military for instance, then the Auxo'. But way, way back before them I've found a Coalition Battlecruiser. In Kepler! And that wasn't it. It was having a chit chat with a Vagrant. Seemed about right, I suppose. Naturally, it didn't last long. It got nabbed into the void a few minutes after I arrived, right before my own eyes and some Order Scout's.
And what really happened next? I met a Xeno. Not just any Xeno, though. The damn Alliance Commander himself! I learned his name later on from some Johnny Silverstone. Damien Morreti's his name. Though I'm kind of afraid of ever saying his name. He seems like a decent man, especially after a rather long convo' we've had next to Ouray. Eventually, he'd offer help, even endorse the creation of a Station. I wasn't keen on quite literally putting effort to create a Station, but I couldn't just drop the chance of having my own home, far from annoying neighbours and all that. Things didn't stop here, though.
Hours later the Auxo had showed up. Johnny really has some odd friends. He introduced me to Raven, some technocrat. It didn't take long for her to notice the trinkets I had with me, so she offered about 500,000,000 Credits five samples. I was about to say yes, had I not had another deal with some Order Commander called "Hawkins". The offer was staggering, and honestly? I'm starting to think it worked on me. I was next to selling one sample for 30,000,000 Credits to The Order, but since the value skyrocketed I thought to myself. "Do I really want to do it?"
So I denied both offers, then ended up next to Cobra again - well, Damien. We settled for Hudson. This time, though? It was different. The Auxo and Johnny were on the line at the same time. So many voices that my brain started boiling. Both the Xenos and the Auxo wanted to offer help. Real help. Damien even gave me a transport from Milford. And the Auxo started doing runs for the Station. I don't know what their beef with one another is, but I couldn't dare to ask. Shit hit the fan shortly after, though.
There's this MND Agent, and then afterwards the Military that chased me down from Liberty to the Omegas. Like, come on. Do they ever run out of fuel? And that's just the start of it. A Vagrant Ish'tar showed up, with Raven next to it. Woman's got a nack for convincing people to do stupid things, and I fell for it out of curiosity. I woke up got knows where after the Warform jumped us all. After that...yeah, I don't want to experience those things ever again. The creature kept getting closer, and all I could do is depart slowly. It then blasted me with a vision, some woman descending from a bright Light, speaking with a mesmerizing tone. It was...amazing at first. Until I realized the Nomad was playing with my mind. I know the mental damage one could suffer from intense exposure to Ish'tars. I was lucky to have Damien on the line. I only remembered something about "Epsilon Two". It was better than fleeing blind from the scene, shocked by the sudden visions. I ended up in Cortez, then he found me in California. I've never been scolded by someone the way Damien did. And honestly? He was fucking right. What was I thinking? Knowingly dealing with Vagrants? Being so careless that one would jump me away to god knows where?! That's just how the Coalition Battlecruiser vanished! I was lucky to get out alive! After all he's done for me I repay him with nearly killing myself and possibly getting infected. After minutes of me being...me, we came to an agreement to have myself scanned for any infection. We got everything sorted, but I'll have to prove my worth so he...well, forgives me for that bullshit of a shitshow.
Ah well...at least it got somewhat solved. Much less the situation with Auxo. Something's off. But for now I have no choice but accept their aid in...anything. Once the station's fully built up I might start up my research on those trinkets. Who knows? I surely don't. Fate's kicking at my door and I end up in a mess everywhere I go. Auxo is heavily against The Order, and The Order is...naturally against Auxo. I still don't know why. I might have to ask for their opinions soon enough. Make up my mind. Vinny's gotta grow a spine. Or just "V", or "Vincent". I've got so many names now from these people I can barely even tell when someone's talking to me.
Fate's a wonderful thing when it plays by your side,
Like, for real now. Free protection, no taxes...it's all a dream come true! And the droids just finished the overhaul. Now the Station doesn't look like a poorly drawn set of cubes anymore. I also had more than enough time to have some well deserved zen time. Making order in my new lab? The most relaxing thing I'd ever done in the last...days. And the best of all? I'm all alone, with nobody screwing up. The droids make sure everything is in order.
On the other hand, things took a weird turn. I ran into a Rogue gunboat today. Guy wanted to blackmail me, demanding money so he doesn't leak out the Station's location. To be honest? I got a tiny bit scared, but I managed to pull his leg just about enough so he left. Might have to discuss with Damien about this later, provided I find him in space. We seem to run into one-another often enough that I'm confident he'll show up eventually. Though I'm no cheap. I'll probably give the Xenos said tax. They deserve it more than the Rogue does, that's for sure. It ain't much, true, but it's at least something.
I'll probably start my research sooner than expected. The lab is halfway done, and the station's construction is going pretty solid. Fifteen days from now it should be at full power! Maybe then I'd start getting into a tiny bit of business with the Xenos to turn the Station into a partly lucrative place for all of us. They need a steady income, and so do I to do my thing. I thought about salvaging, since the Cargo Bays are fully built up now. Might be pretty useful for me too, since I will definitely need some raw materials to build a few things. Or maybe arms dealing.
Damien told me Hudson is a dead zone for the most part. And honestly? It is anything but that. Gallic National Service swooped in a while ago. 'Claimed there was a jump drive failure. Weird place to end up in out of all, but if we take a look at Gallia's history with Liberty I'd say they were lucky. Very lucky, in fact. Surprises didn't end there. I was having a chat with Damien shortly after. He passed by the Research Station while I was outside with Johnny. Later on the latter left, and a Custodian replaced him. A Corsair having a field trip. Now that was unexpected. He got shot down after a while by Auxesians after Damien had to unexpectedly leave, though. So that's that.
I was more than happy to see Damien, really. I thought he'd still bear resentments from the last time we met. We had a talk about secondary business. Something that funds the Xeno movement and my own objectives. We settled to arms dealing for now. I need to instruct the droids so they allow their cargo. We've also talked about more defenses around the System. I skipped a heartbeat when Damien mentioned a damn Cruiser! And not just any - a damn Liberty Siege Cruiser! Very fine piece of hardware. I wonder how they'll make it work. Surprises didn't stop there, either. Johnny mentioned he can bring in a Cruiser of sorts with some drones. What kind of man is he, really? Playing with "drone intestines" as he calls it? Controlling a Cruiser on his own? That's next to impossible. For real. Then again, I learned to expect the unexpected from him.
Hudson's about to become one busy place pretty soon, I suppose. I'm not looking towards it, really. I like my lonely little place where the only inhabitants are some droids and one or two Xenos that pop by every now and then for a pit stop. If it is to become a populated system, I do hope it will be at the very least one filled with decent people.
Few days after the expedition and my head still feels like exploding...
The encounter with Him was by no means a comfortable one, albeit exhilarating. I exposed myself for far too long to a creature vastly outmatching what an Ish'Tar could do in terms of telepathic abilities. And it was the first time, too. The radiation in that relic of a System was not helping either...I fainted as I initiated the docking sequence with Abrams Research Station after the whole mess with Raven, Hachette, John and the Ancient Structure's defenders.
Days after that, I still hear voices whispering in the back of my head, itching everywhere, the feeling that I'm being watched...all side effects of that interaction with Him. Add to that radiation sickness. It tore through my hull like nothing I experienced before. I even noticed some changes in my behavior. I compared myself after some recordings I did before the expedition with the current me. I'm more...aggressive in my speech. It even proved out in Hudson just a few hours ago where both the Navy and the Military were touching torpedo tips. I managed to maintain a somewhat cool appearance, but eventually I had to leave before I broke the charade.
On the other hand, I even met John today after all that...mess. Right in the nick of time, even. That MND Gunboat showed up again, making threats to my well being. The Agent eventually left for god knows where. John on the other hand seems...fine now. Despite him wanting to break me and Raven's legs for the stunt we pulled. We settled things. Mostly. I kind of dipped into my future plans, too. The ones I'd rather keep to myself, and now to John. I'll assume he won't spill the beans. Then again, I wasn't in my right mind even then. I might said something I wouldn't ever do. Right now the headache is still killing me...god what I wouldn't for a bottle of finely made scotch! But that would just dehydrate me more and cause worse migranes, though.
I should be fine soon enough. Such cases can't last for that long. Though the times symptoms spike up in intensity sure are...harrowing. Once I get a little bit better I'll start looking into what's wrecking Raven. She's helped me so far. I can't just turn down on her like this.
Where should I even begin with? I've been into multiple expeditions since the last entry. What's worse is that each of them took place in a seemingly random place, though I wouldn't say the radiation lacked - more on that later, I suppose. The last trip through the Anomaly in Kepler sent me to a place that...I can't quite understand. Though it surely did piss off the Nomads. So called "Sentinels", as Raven called them.
Things only went downhill since then. The after-party was even worse. While in there, everyone was crumbling, falling apart, even. Even the Nomad beside me was scared beyond belief - I think. Meanwhile I was somewhat smiling, mesmerized by the view. I can't even believe I smiled while the people around me were...in a bad shape. Both Laz and Raven were wrecked, Alyssa and Aisling were nowhere to be found, and the Nomad Voidrunner was standing alongside me. Just...there. Am I a sociopath?
I haven't heard from either Alyssa, Aisling or Laz ever since. I need to check on all of them at some point, maybe once I'm back home. The period since then and now had its highs and lows. For once, I did get to enjoy myself next to another human being - Raven. We were on a sort of "date", I suppose. I really needed a break from all this, but then the lows came. She warned me about the Sentinels which had begun to watch me. They still do, especially since the last expedition. She said I should forget about it. I tried, but then John decided it'd be a good time to leak my plans to the Navy to take revenge on the Xenos and Auxo. I fell in the crossfire, and shortly after the Order decided to come in, as well as me being kicked out of Liberty. The Order wanted to know specifically what I was doing, but I couldn't just say that. I would've risked to have the Nomads show up. So I told them everything and nothing. Seems to have worked so far.
After all that, the Buro decided to come in action. But before that, I've had a talk with a so called "Hemlocke", whom offered shelter should I not find the Xenos. I suppose she ain't that much of a fool to not smell something fishy. To cover it up, I asked her to shoot me and Lumia - the Bounty Hunter I met at some point - to act as an alibi for me. Defend me. We played it out nicely. Kind of. And then the Buro came in. After the fight, I eventually got scared beyond reason as the pilot pointed out my guns, and started asking questions. Would it be that easy? No. Of course not.
The Sentinels - or so I think - showed up for the first time at that time. Why? Because I suddenly had my mind flooded with the memories of the last expedition. I couldn't help it. I don't why or how, but then some of their smaller craft had showed. Small, possibly scouts. She escorted me alongside a Rheinland Military Vessel to Thuringia, where we stationed next to Battleship Bayern. The scouts followed through all the way. I was told multiple times to dock - get to safety - despite my protests. I guess I cracked and did actually dock, only to undock and try to help. The Sentinels were already done for, but the problems had only started. Now the Buro wants to interrogate me. I'm still on Bayern, and this Viper wants to have a chat. Something about moving to a more secret location, too..."a researcher's dream".
The only dream I can possibly have right now is getting home, but I suppose that won't happen anytime soon. I should at least enjoy it while it lasts. If some pirates or the Navy won't take it down, me just dying will surely make it quite useless. The various expeditions in highly radioactive areas did not only damage my wallet for changing up the lead plates on my Marauder, but also my own body. Who woulda' thunk' that radiation gives you cancer after prolonged exposure? So far a medical examination made by one of the droids on Abrams Research Station confirmed that I have lung cancer. Raven already offered help for that, though it ain't that the thing that concerns me. The droid said something's wrong with my body - something aside the lungs. I asked it what. It simply gave out an error. Only time will tell, I suppose. Though it might as well be an actual error.
Really now. For how long will I keep avoiding the truth? I keep lying to everyone I meet. So much so that I slowly started to master this art. Kind of. Recently I shamelessly lied to The Order about what I do in Kepler. Well, I kind of said the truth. Just not all of it. They're breathing down my neck as well as other entities. Eventually they'll find out. What then? They could shoot me down for hiding information. They could just be disappointed. Though it isn't them I'm scared of the most.
Raven has been helping me out all the way, and it hurts to think that every interaction I have with The Order, or with Auxo's enemies has to be backed up by a ton of lies. She worries about my safety and all that, I get it. But I worry about her health more. Nobody will care if I die in some dump. I'm fine with that, knowing I won't affect anyone by then - well...except a few. But Raven? She goes out, the entirety of Auxo might suffer from that. Normally I shouldn't care. I really, really shouldn't.
"Shouldn't" means more of a "you should" to me though, judging by the recent events. At least while I have time. The only possible solution to her condition - at least the way I see it - is pressuring Barry into helping out. He's Dreamer. Something way above what the usual types of Nomads. I can't believe it doesn't know anything about how to fix Raven. Or perhaps one of the systems hide a clue. That would mean I'd be risking again a trip to Kepler. Through Liberty. I've started to consider aligning with the Xenos a bit more for that, though. My Marauder can't take any more trips through the Anomaly in Kepler. The engine is busted. The hull segments, core internals and the power core itself are on the verge of breaking. It just can't take anymore. I think I'll have to turn to either Raven, Damien or...as hard it is to say, Viper.
Raven would probably borrow me a Fighter from the Edge Worlds, or give me access to a dealer that has such. I hope for the latter. I don't want to take more than I should or can. Damien offered a...what was it called? Rebel it was, I think. Well, he did a while ago. With all the papers attached. I'd be flying as a Xeno with it. And of course, it'd be borrowed. I wish I could go for that, but in doing so I'd be quite literally dooming myself. Not only because the ship has a few flaws that would make it unsuitable for the Anomaly in Kepler - and any interaction with larger Nomads. But for the stigma. Nobody would believe me when I say I just "found" this wreck in Hudson. If I made a story for it. I also don't want to just ask Damien such a thing. He provided a whole array of services, while I've given little back. I don't quite deserve that kind of privilege.
Viper would probably give me access to some Rheinland Ships if I play my cards. I doubt, though. But she seems related to Raven so...worth a shot? I think? Provided I'd get the papers in order, I can in theory use a Valkyrie for those depressing trips into the unknown and have some more protection, as well. I just need something to bring to the bargain. Something of interest to her. Research data? What would I have to possible put on the table? Maybe...hmm. Cortana? She still hasn't responded to the request for materials. Might as well give her a reminder that I still breathe. There I go lying again...kind of. Or perhaps a promise that I'd give her some of the data I've gathered along this wicked adventure. She knows I hate sharing it. Perhaps that.
Vincent "The Schemer" Abrams. It kind of starts to fit now. Sorry, Barry. Your nickname starts to fit on someone else.
Two days ago I talked with Viper about a new ship. Equipment, I call it. We also discussed less- uh. More odd topics. Like a date. Being hired by the MND as a fully fledged scientist. But...yeah. A date with the now newly appointed Director of the Buro. How do I keep hitting the fan like this? Viper is great, I mean! But she's hinting towards actual dates all so often that I think it is more out of interest, rather than her actually liking me. I guess it's worth a shot either way, isn't it? Especially when she told me to visit Planet Holstein for some reason. And that I should "be happy". I've got mixed feelings about it, but I've done more stupid things than this.
Raven is a whole other story, though. She decided to take up on Barry's help with her uh. Condition. I tried to be supportive and give whatever help I could, but either she's too self reliant for that or I am too poor to even help her. We had a long discussion over it. About how I am a bit against the idea of risking your own memories. Your own self. Forgetting yourself is a sad way to go, and I stand by that argument. Couldn't have made it even worse that I stared babbling about feelings I don't want anyone to have. How stupid was I to relate them to myself by a tiny bit? Especially after she asked me to just "vent" what I feel. She knows I can't do that. And I know I don't want to do that. How the f*ck am I supposed to vent? By breaking down into tears the second I reach the part where my room has a wall painted with dried blood that I didn't wash to this day? About how well I let my emotions out last time?
She will see me like some sort of sad, lonely person can't even see beyond depression. Well...sometimes I am that. But not in public, or next to actual people. Especially Raven. She's worried about me all the time, and I am worried about her all the time acting as if everything is fine and dandy until either of us hit rock bottom. I don't want to live up to the point where one of us falls to a point of no return and the other can only watch.
I suppose noting down a few people I've met along the way was inevitable.
Well...uh. Where should I start? I suppose from the start, as any normal human being would. After all, things happen in a certain order. Hah! Order...the first person on my list would be an Order Operative, as amusing as it may be.
Eliza Fischer is the very first person I've met in the Omicrons. Years ago, at the very least. She was also quite possibly the first woman I've had a more lengthy conversation with, despite the circumstances. I still miss her, even though her tone had more of a "piss off or I'll kill you" tone. After all, I called her a terrorist. Truth is I didn't know any better at that time. I want to find her one day and say that I'm sorry. That I'm sorry for the piece of trash I was back then. Show her how much I've changed since I wanted to be a hotshot and take on the world all by myself. Well, me and my Falcon. R.I.P Falcon, by the way. Wherever you are, Eliza...please be well.
John Silverstone would be the next on this list, I suppose. It would've been the guys on Team Six that I was with during that expedition. I forgot their names, though. Either way...John fu*king Silverstone. I like to believe he wasn't a bad guy after all, and that he still isn't. He introduced me to Raven and a few others. To that I somewhat owe him. We had our highs and lows...but I suppose the friendship was still there. Until he ratted Raven and Cobra out to the authorities. I fell in the crossfire. I suppose I have to thank him for the fact that now everyone and their mother within the Navy, Police, and LSF knows that there's a freak in Hudson doing god knows what. That is why I was kicked out of Liberty, as well. Why I now have to sneak around instead of going from point A to point B like a human being. He's a Bounty Hunter now, I suppose. One that I've heard he wants to kill civilians - me, for instance. I should probably steer away from him, just in case.
Raven. Boy there's so much about her that I don't know, yet I do at the same time. John introduced me to her back at Ames. Funny, she offered me 500,000,000 Credits to just give her the materials I've gotten from the Dyson Sphere. That was when we first met. Sometimes I wonder how things would've turned out if I accepted the offer and walked out with cash in my pockets and live the life of my dreams. I suppose I'll never know...since I denied that offer. Over few weeks - or months - we've been collaborating I've started to find myself in her personality. Or she would find herself in mine. I like to believe that we stick with one another out of common goals, curiosity and the fact that we're blackmailing one another with our lives. Leader of the Technocracy, wanted by all, known person to somewhat commune with aliens...and a friend. Both of us have jumped into the mess people call Kepler. Sometimes I wonder if either of us will get out of this alive. I hope it'll be her, at the very least. I'm spent, either way...
Damien Morreti. The Cobra. Leader of the Xeno Alliance, elite fighter and a man who knows how to use words to get people to his cause. Also the one who offered all the help he can provide to my safety in Hudson along with the Technocracy. I will never be able to thank him enough for the help. The Xenos are up there in the top leagues of being a thorn into Liberty's side. I wonder what will come of Hudson once he expands his operations. I've come to defend him at times. Him and his fighters, like Locke, or "Ridgenose" who's the so called landlord of Hudson. I don't have much to say beyond the fact that I trust him and the Alliance over other entities such as The Order and so forth.
William Storgen. He's up there in the Overwatch's hierarchy. He sounds like a good man, honestly. I haven't met him all that often, but I suppose a busy man such as him doesn't have the time to allocate to civilians. He's dedicated to The Order's cause. And I can see that. Pure goals and all that...just sometimes misplaced, warped. He wants what's best for humanity from what I've seen. I often wonder if he'd accept other ways of defending humanity. Ways that don't include obvious aggression against the Nomads. There will be a time when both of us will either have a standoff, or shake hands and go on our own paths when all of this drama blows over. He knows I cooperate with the Technocracy to an extent. So far he seemed to understand that, so...that's that.
Viper. I got to know her at first as a scientist. We met a few times, talked about things, albeit her advances to uh, me, were noted. Maybe a bit too aggressive at that, but I can't expect much from an operative of the Buro - well, a scientist, at that. Now? She's the Director of the Buro. She saved me before from the Sentinels, and so far has given me safe harbor on stations owned by the MND. Maybe with her I won't risk that much to be outlawed from Rheinland, too. If that would even happen. She's alright, and all. And since Raven seems to be friends with her, I suppose she's my friend, too.
Cortana Clarke would be the last on my list for today, at the very least. There's so much memory an entry can take. Either way. She's probably the one person I know least about. Raven told me she used to be part of The Commune. And I remember that bunch well from the time I was nearly contracted by one of their bomber. She offered me a "job". An opportunity, rather. We were supposed to work together on hybrid technology, more specifically on an organic type of shield that mimics what the Nomads have developed. Their "veils". Raven also told me that she might be wanting to build an abomination, something similar to a ship called "The Tundra". I suppose there's that. Nothing good can come out of this, but she promised to share some of the schematics, if not all. Of the research, that is. I need to get in touch with her soon, either way. Things had been delayed enough as is with the latest expeditions.
I...thought I'd be continuing the list of the people whom I met along the way. Like Tulip, Laz, Alyssia, Aisling...well, uhm. I'll probably continue that a bit uhm. Well, later.
So, uhm. The Marauder...yeah. It didn't survive the ordeal as I wanted it to. It is a nice ship, really. I mean it. But, uh...it's too old. Outmatched by a lot of other options. And uh...the Anomaly wrecked it. Going through it three or four times just like that...I'm honestly sorry for what my old ship had to go through. At least it held while it uh...did. Now I've got a new ship. Stronger hull, at that. It uhm...it's an Odin. A Mark One, even. The ship's design surely isn't the most attractive. But I've gone through a test with it. See how it fares against Radiation.
So I went to The Shrine. It did...surprisingly well. I won't say no. Hopefully the Odin will hold up a little better than the Marauder. But I still wished to see Viper and hopefully get whatever she wanted to...I don't know. The reason she called me over to Holstein. I suppose I'll never find out, will I?
On the other hand...Nomad Weaponry, a ship from the Blackmarket...former Red Hessian tech at that, illicit friends like pirates, so called "Nomad infectees". Well, I suppose I'm an evil researcher now. What am I supposed to do, though? Sit on my ass while everything I have degrades from lack of maintenance, just because I want to use relatively "legal" tools? If I want to see the end of this adventure, I have to use all the tools I can get my hands on. Legal or illegal.
With a new ship I can now focus on getting ready for that "Last Journey". I have no idea what we'll meet on the other end. Yeah, we. I...found out that Raven wants to tag along, and I can't quite say no to that. She also wants to bring in a few friends. For safety and all. I've, uh. Considered bringing someone in myself. So I thought about the best I could get interested to join in. That's either Damien or Locke. I would've invited Lumia in, but she's all caught up with business. I haven't asked either of them. I'm trying to find a way to invite them without saying it as if I invite them to die.
"Hey! So I'm putting up a team with a few friends...break through the Anomaly one last time. And I thought I'd invite you to the team to...help me out. No, no. It's not a death sentence. We don't know what's on the other end." ...yeah, I don't think that'll cut it. Oh hell...what do I have to lose? It's either I go in with someone by my side or completely alone. I know few who will watch my back while things go down...uh. Somewhere.