Okay here is a quick draw over I did of your model.
First the overall design isn't bad. But there are a few problems that need addresses.
1: That extrude you have there. Try to do it without touching both of the edges of the angles.
I would say drop two edge loops in there, one at the top and one at the bottom. Then extrude it.
Actually edge loops might be a little extreme in this case, but you get the idea I think.
2: This line is to thin, and the extrudes to deep. When making the bottom one extrude it in, but keep it at the same elevation, give it some space between the edges and then extrude it up.
3: From what I can tell you should have some polys to play with on this model still, so use them.
Create frames for these indents, it will look better in the end.
It's fine as it is now, most of the 'detailing' you guys are asking for can be done with textures. Sure, he probably could bring the poly count higher, but how would he do it? The model is already comfortably full of things on it as is.
Looks nice. Love your model but I still like the old model.
But the ravens talon (Ravens claw in star wars) I think should stay the same or completely remove it for a different looking ship instead of a look'o'like.
The ship feels very frail, particularly from the front view. I deffinately wouldn't call it a VHF with that model. Those engines also are not giving off a very freelancer-sih vibe, they look like they should be on a jet plane not a space ship.
The designers of star wars who made the ravens talon thought about it as a space ship. This has I think same size engines.
Should a ship that uses all its space in the model for a purpose. Middle is cockpit and life support systems. with 2 engines stuck on the sides nothing more needed. I really like the talon (Still don't get it why its called the talon and not claw.)