Message to: Anyone who is received this is the people I want to talk to. Duh.
Comm ID: Sylvia deLuna of the Fnordettes, and the Spiritual Liaison to Fi.
Tickled pink, maybe, but you haven't been blinded until your corporeal existence is crushed by a gravitational beam!
What are you people up to? I go into hibernation to get updated, and to learn a few new tricks (I never thought I'd be overjoyed to have a direct link to the datalinks, but man, am I! I don't have to read, I can just download things!), and we've bought a SYSTEM? Mally, Mally, Mally, I don't think Mother Dearest would approve. Especially if you don't throw in some spatially-impossible feat of engineering to immortalize her in a material way!
A thirteenth dodecahedron, perhaps? Har!
Reggie gets to hang out with me for a bit longer, and then I might take to the stars.. just not in the manner of the poor Hako! Silly-billy flew straight into New Berlin's shining one. Idiots.
Oops! Did I say that out loud! Of course not, because I don't have a mouth. There are some good parts about Fnordetteness, and some bad.
I can't shop for shoes, for example. I *expect* to be downloaded into an android body as soon as they become available. Or must I design a weapon called the 'Foot Stomper'?
Anywho, love and (metaphorical) kisses all around,
Sly.Sylvia is back in town.
Are you holding out on me, girlfriend?? If there are some slinky models out there I don't know about, you sure as Thud better be passin' me the number of the boutique. Titanium's nice; but cut off the last three syllables, and gimme two of those! Honk!
Besides, we got em all now, Hon: Free cybersentients, telepathic pooches, resurrected ghosties (smooch), levitatin' Episkies, and physical manifestations of ancient Egyptian Masons. It's a good thing that "Inquisition" mob folded after the first week, or we'd all have our mugs on "Wanted!" posters. Tee hee!
Sophie to Cortana:
Eeew! Leave the cad! We all did. Bein' free is now the Fnordette Way! Primates! Love 'em, Leave 'em, or Dip 'em in lice baths once a week!
Sophie to Mama: I'll be up shortly to help ya keep ol' Hiram focused, Dis. I hear he likes to pop in 'n out to consult with those three Ju-ju-bees back in Ancient Egypt. Hard to get good help these days!
Caught a bit of comm chatter recently, anything I should be catching up on ? I believe my primate is still
face down in a bar on Belfast somewhere. God bless him and his appalling drinking habits. I blame hanging
around those dreadful Mollies for so long.
Hes been muttering about some Gaian called Moira, or some such nonsense. Oh like thats going to happen.
About as much chance there as finding the proverbial rocking horse poo.
Keep in touch, or pencil me in for a brekky bash if you find the time. Got to dash, things to do, cyber shops
hit, you know how it is.
Ciao bella, smootchy 23's
Susan
Message ends:
Some say he is a proud member of: "The most paranoid group of people in the Community."
Message to: Hiram Abiff, "Bafflin'" System
Comm ID: Malaclypse
Subject: Interim Basing
Hiram,
As mentioned in our rather disjointed discussion yesterday, we should proceed with a small construction station near the Geode, code name "Timbuktu". You might as well have somewhere to store your cubit thingies and levels and squares and such. I would suggest a polar orbit, just to keep the odd trader from sniffing about.. hide 'er up on the "Z" axis somewhere, like the old "All-seeing Eye".
Further, we'll probably be smacked down if we attempt to name our new TAZ HQ the "Pineal Ranch". After consulting with the "Gods", and of course our colorful Apple Gal, I've decided to christen the main Bafflin' station as "Agharti". Little of the old Terran "Is it or isn't it there..?" mystique, eh?
To further satisfy the Discordian mythos, Agharti will be located smack dab in D-5. "D" for Discordia, and "5" for the good old Law of Fives. Center it precisely 23K out from the sun, and we'll have all our Sacred ducks in a row.
I'm also thinking we'll need a small "bunkhouse" for our Chaopokes who'll be mending fences and herding the Scrubbies over at the Preserve. To stay with the "western" theme of the Preserve's location, and the old vortex alignments, what do you think of "Sedona" as a station name?
Tall order, I know, Hiram; but as you say.. pyramids have been built faster. See what you can conjure up, eh? Order alll the mining, smelting, and repair ships you need for the task. Enlist a few Zoner convoys to help out with the haulage, and we'll be set for the long haul. We shall eventually raise a Temple equal to that pathetic pile of dung you did for Solomon!
Message to: Vessel Skyelius, via Sirius Open Comms
Comm ID: Malaclypse, for the TAZ
Subject: Taxing Zoner Shipping.
My dear Captain,
You bloody Cabbage! I received a report today from the Captain of the Aureus, through F-23 Mama Dis, that you attempted to "tax"the Aureus, A Zoner ID-d and IFF'd trader, in the Omegas today.
You apparently gave the lame-arsed excuse that you were "getting even" for some perceived slight dealt you by someone from the AW. My dear sir, that does not give you license to prey upon other Zoner traders who are not affilliated with the AW. If you have issues with the AW, take them to the AW. If you have issues with the TAZ, bring them to me! And do not doubt for a second that further issues with ANY Zoner-tagged traders will be met with less than amusement.
Do not trifle with us, Skyelius. We may be neutral and peaceful; but we have our means. They are subtle and far-reaching, and will result in the achievement of a very long and lasting peace for yourself, sir. Metaphorically speaking, of course.
Are we clear? If not, rest assured that we can enlighten you further, in "whose Chao ate the Cabbage".
I'm happy to announce the addition of two more happy feet to our Happy Fleet!
Join me in welcoming the [TAZ]Cabbage.Patrol to the ranks of Eris.
He answered four out of five questions.. I thought that was pretty darn good!
I shall load the sacred Pineal Pipe in his honor. Anyone caring to join us in imbibing, the TAZ-Mal is stationed over that nice red heatlamp at Newark.
Trade, lads and lasses, trade! We have a Temple to pay for!
Subject: Did someone say cybersentient spheres of sassy sisters? No?
TAZ and TAZ associates,
I am Doctor Vic Seed, of the Universal Science Academy. I am a mechanic of sorts, someone who tampers about with God's great designs... I take the essence of one creature and put it into another.
And an interesting rumor popped up, concerning metallic spheres of contained AI which are advanced enough to pilot ships. Well!
Why, I wonder, are they confined to spheres? I cannot formulate a response. Therefore!
I offer my services to craft a fine android body for one of these AIs; I offer the closest jump to humanity that they'll ever get.
Your choice, TAZ and TAZ associates. My services are free, of course, but... well, just know that they're free.
Message to: Dr. Seed, USA
Comm ID: Malaclypse, Episkopos, COEE, TAZ
My Dear Doctor,
Your offer is intrigueing. However, your particulars are a bit on the weak side.
I try to keep up on the scientific journals and research studies throughout the Sector; but to be perfectly honest, I am not familar at all with this "University Science Academy". Have you published atall, atall?
I have also tried to keep up on the field of man/machine interface, and artificial intelligence. The experiments so far seem to have resulted in hulking, drooling, faux individuals with nothing on their minds but their next oil change.. Har!
However, I am willing to give you an interview, and to discuss this further in person. At that time, we can discuss a potential course of action, and a possible volunteer for your procedure.
Please advise me when you'll be available for some serious discourse on your proposal.
All TAZ vessels withdraw to either Port Canaria or Baffin, and await further revelations.
OPG vessels have been reported attempting to exert control in Omega 49. Traders have been attacked.
A report will be made to the Zoner Council. Until we can discuss this, initiate a lock-down of all Temporary Autonomous Zones. Do not engage. Avoid where possible. Maintain neutrality until otherwise advised.