The Chief storms out of his office and pulls out a wireframe pair of glasses. He then pulls out a paper, and starts by saying "Officer Seymore Justice is promoted. This is what he did to get promoted."
He then recites:
"Oh my Chief, hear this tuneless poet sing,
In most heartfelt praise filled with earnest hope,
That my sweet neck youll never have to wring,
Nor with my problems will you have to cope.
Within my dreams, or with my own blue eyes,
Ive witnessed your awesome wrath come upon,
Some ignorant recruit who cannot fly,
And thinks his poop looks pretty like chiffon.
When I hearken back, to bosses of old,
And the many abuses Ive received,
I pray that your rage is always controlled,
And the pain doesnt last from bricks youve heaved.
Lastly, I express with real desire,
In this ode that must be merciflly brief,
That I can avoid that, which brings your ire,
And bring a smile on the face of my Chief"