[color=#99FF99]Sender: [color=#99FFFF]MacElroy, Nathan - King of the Libertonian Em... err, Commander, that was it, currently aboard the Battleship Overlord, lower orbit of Planet Manhattan, New York system. Recipients:The Liberty Navy Mid and High Command and the Security Force, especially Ass-Deputy Director Wolfe... or Puppy? and Commander Jack 'Mister Badass' Malrone
*Commander MacElroy appears on the screen, sitting in the Overlord's command chair, his mightily impressive red beard covering most of his chest, a grin on his face, a cigar in his mouth, a crown on his head.*
"'Ey dere, Wolfie Puppy, listen up fer a secon', willya?
Looky, things be like tis' ere.
Ye or ye boys screwed up.
Ye don' be sayin' anythin' other than crap.
Yer pissin' Christaycakes an' m'Queen off, an 'ah dun' be likin' that much, realley.
An' not t'mention good ol' Ryan.
Who, 'ah be thinkin' won' be likin' what he mighta' be seein' 'ere later.
An' y'know, 'ah be thinkin' ye be doin' somethin' worse.
Ye mighta' been pissin' off Davey if y'go on like y'did, aye?
So maybey, maybey listen to what 'e bin' sayin'.
So 'ah be thinkin' more, and then 'ah be thinkin' a lil' more extra, how t'help everyone 'ere, aye?
An' y'know, 'ah think, lemme make some o' those thingeys said 'ere clearer fer ye, aye?"
*He raises his left hand's index finger, holding the cigar with the other hand.*
"Fer a first, ye bein' mighteley disrespectful t'Christay an' m'Queen.
That be meanin', ye bein' disrespectful to two high-rankin' officers of the Libertey Navey.
An' a lot o' good men an' women who like 'um lots.
Like me."
*He raises his left hand's middle finger now.*
"'Ah be thinkin' that what Davey said, that' be right.
Ye know, ye wan' US t'wage that 'dere war, an' t'end it.
But that' be bein' prettey 'ard if WE 'ave t'keep an eye out fer our backdoors an' all which ye be s'pposed t'be watchin'.
'Ah think y'got a big durn problem 'ere.
Ye dun' be gettin' that that part o' ol' Alaska, that bit up North, that be yer own territoray.
Which yer are bein' s'posed t'guard so we can go on an' keep wagin' that war with less o' those thingeys called worries on our minds, aye.
'Ah mean, we work on the same side an' all, aye?
So we shoulda' work together, aye?
So why din' your lot do their part o' this whole cooperation thingey 'ere?
But aaaneywaysh, on to..."
*Now he raises his ring finger too.*
"...number three, aye.
'Ah be thinkin' ye dun' be gettin' somethin' else 'ere.
Ye sayin' that ye were busay or whateeever, that dun' be sayin' frak all, aye.
That be a simple 'NAY' t'us all.
That be meanin' every'un 'ere.
In the 'ntire Navey.
An' y'know, a simple 'NAY', that won' be cuttin' it.
It be like Davey be sayin'.
Ye be givin' us a reason.
An', if what y'say be as it be, then y'know, lassie..."
*He lowers his hand and leans back in the chair, grinning.*
"If ye only be respondin' to Deputay Directo' Deus an' Directo' Copperfield..."
*For a moment, he inhales deeply, savoring the taste of the cigar before blowing out a mightly impressive and giant smoke ring...
Then he leans forward and suddenly...*
"WHY THE FRAK DON' YE DAFT ARSE GET 'UM 'ERE T'RESPOND AN' SHUT YER OWN PRETTAY DOLLFACE INSTEAD OF TALKIN' TRASH AN' WASTIN' OUR FRAKKIN' TIME WHICH WE SHOULDA' BE SPENDIN' ON FOCUSIN' ON THE FRAKKIN' WAR YE WAN' US TO FRAKKIN' END AS QUICKLEY AS FRAKKIN' POSSIBLE YE DUMB, RETARDED, STUPID BROAD?
DID YA SLEEP YER WAY UP THE FOOD CHAIN OR D'YE JUS' BE LIKIN' TO WASTE EVEREYBODEY'S FRAKKIN' TIME BY SAYIN' 'NAY' T'EVEREYTHIN' LIKE A FRAKKIN' CATHOLIC SCHOOLGIRL WHO BE BANGIN' HALF THE 'RANGO'S CREW LATER THE SAME NITE WHEN SHE BE DRUNK ANEYWAY YE DAFT FRAKKIN' ARSE?
BEN' THE FRAK OVER AN' GET IT OVER WITH Y'DOLT 'FORE SOMEONE BE COLLECTIN' YER FRAKKIN' 'EAD, FOR THE SAKE O' ZEUS' FAT ARSE!"
*He manages to catch his breath and then leans back once more, now grinning again and frowning for a moment as he notices he broke his cigar in half.*
"Well, y'know lassie, y'coulda' do that."
*For a moment, he flashes a strangely devilish, and rather scary grin.*
"But onley if y'wan' to.
Oh an', on 'nother note, why don' y'bring yer pretty dollface aboard the good Overlord 'ere sometime?
'Ah be thinkin' you an' me coulda' 'ave looots o' fun 'board 'ere."
*Aaand now he manages to somehow look... serious? Serious. Dead serious? Hell yeah!*
"'Ah be 'avin' a good message fer our residen' Badass, Commander Malrone.
Jackie, Jackie, Jackie.
Y'know, 'ah shouldnae' be doin' tis', since 'ah be a Commander too, aye, but Willows kind o' 'ad t'go down t'Fort Bragg on ol' 'Hattan t'meet up with Sethy, so, aye, is an exception, laddie."
*After clearing his throat and striking a pose, he continues with his manly, deep voice.*
"Commander Jack 'Mister Badass' Malrone, 'ah, Nathan MacElroy, King o' the Libertonian Empire, be herebyeth knightin' ye... err, wait... nay...
Oh, aye.
'Ah, Nathan MacElroy, King o' the Libertonian Empire, be hereby promotin' ye an' ye behind to the glorious rank o' El Capitan, that be meanin' Cap'n, or... Captain, 'ah be thinkin', in the Royal Libertonian Navey.
The Queen... err... Admiral Willows, 'ah be meanin', y'know, the Boss, Sarah, she 'ad been sayin' that y'been doin' a mighteley fine job, an 'ah 'ave seen yer work, an 'ah agree.
Yer' 'ereby promoted to that rank, an 'ah be thinkin', 'long with Sarah, Davey, Galen, Ryan an' Christaycakes, that ye be makin' a realley aaaweeesom' Cap'n.
So y'be keepin' up the good work, 'ah be sure, an 'ah hope ye be enjoin' the new priviledges that be comin' with that 'dere promotion."
*He relaxes and... smiles? Sure does. Like, totally. I mean, Mac is a really happy man.*
"That be all, Cap'n."
*Did he just... OH GOD HE SALUTED? MY GOD, HE SALUTED TO MALRONE!
Oh and the screen fades to black here.*