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It may have seen cruel to some but for a moment, he just let her be....allowing the realism to soak in.
"I didn't say you will, Hildagart," he said firmly, "but I'm throwing that "what if" scenario at you. I often hear of such hate of something spoken by groups like the Hessians, Unioners, Corsairs and so forth. I just wouldn't want to see their hate come to that."
He then put down his drink and knelt before her, placing a kind hand between her shoulder blades, "This, Hildagart, is what I try to prevent. There is too much hatred in Sirius......and trust me when I say that I've done my fair share of killing to know about it."
He let her catch her breath before placed and gentle back hand under her chin and lifted her head up. Her face was wet. He then took a tissue and began to dry it. As he did, he spoke kindly, "You can lead the way, Hildagart. You can teach your children forgiveness even if it is painful. Staying home, staying away from the war in their time of need is a great start."
Finished drying her face, he helped her back to her feet and began to escort her back to her chair.
Hilda nodded slightly. "I will try to teach them... f..forgiveness..." She slumped back into the chair. "But I don't know if... I can forgive... due to... what they did... to mien Daughters... both... Gretel... und... M...Mathilde..." She sighs. "They... did nothing... wrong... und... they..." She wipes her eyes again. "They... didn't deserve this... Mathilde more so... her life hadn't even begun..."
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"Perhaps forgive isn't the right term," he answered, still staying near her, "not after everything you have all been through. Needing to let go of the hate is a better way."
"No," he continued, "none of you deserved this, not even a little, but to keep the hate, to dwell on it, it's a wound that won't ever heal."
As she sat in her chair, he stayed on a knee before her, "Your children feed off of you....follow your example. You need to think of them."
He again dried her face, "You're a pretty lady too. I wouldn't want to see you walking around angry for the rest of your life. I know you don't want that either for yourself or your children."
Doc reached over and took his glass of Schnapps and took a sip, "Fine stuff," he smiled.
Hilda nodded. "But... there is nien way that I could... have what I have lost..." She sighs. "Gretel... really wanted a sister... und... that was ripped from her..." She refills her glass. "But... I do not know a way of solving that problem... I... er..." She drinks her Schnapps before talking again. "I cannot carry... since... die... miscarriage damaged me too much..." She sighs again, "Und... d..die... Vater... I don't have... Gunter anymore... I..." She gulps down more Schnapps. "I... don't know what to do anymore... I...I..." She looks back at Doc.
"I sometimes cannot bare to look at Gretel... what she has become breaks mien heart... seeing what used to be a happy little girl become a shell of herself.... it breaks mien heart..."
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"This will take time," he explained softly, "none of this will be fixed tomorrow...or the next day....or the next. This healing process will take some months." He put a hand on her shoulder as he continued, "and as the doctor you hired to help, I will see you through all of it. You have my word on it."
"Time, Hildagarten, time," he continued, "I can't bring back Gunter but I know he would want you to move on." He patted his chest, "Gunter will be right there....always."
He sat back with that soft, re-assuring smile that patients seemed to be soothed by and took another sip of his Schnapps. "Now, there's no way I can say this without it sounding......inappropriate.....but if you can furnish me a full copy of your medical report from the miscarriage, I'll see what I might be able to do. THAT is something I'm quite good with. If it helps, my ex wasn't supposed to be able to carry again but she currently is with her new husband."
He leaned forward a bit with his Schnapps, "I want you to try something...right now. Look at me and try to smile, even if it's a small one. It's another step in this process."
Hilda's jaw dropped seemingly in disbelief.
"You can heal die damage...?" Slowly it seemed a smile might cross her face but soon she sighed.
"Don"t know what gut it will do... since... I... lost... Gunter und don't know if... tgere is anyone who would... love someone like.... me..." She sighs again.
"Even then.... if I have a boy... I don't think Gretel would... react too well... und anyway... it's unethical... Nien?" She looked back at Doc.
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"Don't be so hard on yourself," replied Doc, "You would still be a good catch for someone." He kept it professional, not wanting her to think that he was trying to take advantage of her while she was weak or something to that affect. She was, after all, still very well proportioned for a mother of three.
"And no, someone new isn't unethical," he continued, "do give yourself and your children time to heal....to grieve. I know that they will want you to be happy even if it takes some time."
"As to healing you. I didn't say I could but I did say that I would look into it. I like to think that nothing is impossible. Firstly though, I will need your medical file."
Doc chuckled a little, "If you did conceive again one day, I don't think Gretel would be too upset. After all, she would be a big sister regardless, Jah?"
He took another sip of his Schnapps.
Hilda sighed. "I er... said... that Gretel... wanted not just to be a big sister... but a big sister to a little sister..." She took the bottle of Schnapps and refilled her glass. "That... is the unethical thing..." She downed the glass of Schnapps. "I want to see mien little girl... happy... once more... und I will do what ever is necessary to achieve it..." She once again sighed. "I guess there is someone else that likes me... but... what... if they don't like mien kinder?"
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"One step at a time, Hildagarten," Doc responded, filling his glass with Schnapps as well. Looking into the glass as he swirled the contents, he said to her, "This is good stuff. Not too hard and it goes down smooth. Anyway..."
"Gretel will be herself again in the near future," he said sitting back a bit, "It's a trying time for her, even more so than her brothers with your miscarriage but she will come around. Time, Hilda, time. It's a tool we must employ."
"And again," he continued, "don't be so hard on yourself. You have only been recently widowed and have spent much of your time on ship. Someone will take notice of you." Doc finally broke one of his rules, "OK, I'll say it. You're an attractive women. Tall, in shape and a catch for sure. Let's get your confidence back and we'll go on further. I know this doesn't help much but it's a point, you're not the only woman ever to lose someone they love. Many others have and in time, they move on."
He sipped his Schnapps, "I think you'll be fine."
Hildagart looked at Doc and almost smiled.
"Well getting mien medical records is very easy...." She refilled her glass.
"Well I didn't expect you to say that... Well... Gunter aways said I was die best looking woman on Stuttgart..." She then downs her Schnapps.
"I hope... I will be able to give Gretel die sister she wanted and deserves..." She sighs again.
"But I will have to find someone first..." She looks at the know empty bottle os Schnapps.