Now, chaps. Officers, being mostly (alas) men of breeding and distinction, must soldierly shoulder the bitter burden of competent command with good grace, lustrous leadership, and most importantly, from as far from the actual war-zone as possible.
Dying is the duty of the working-classes, and one they must relish as if it were a well-delivered licking from Venus herself. Or one of her orderlies. Or even the waiting staff at the Savoy.
Our young Ensigns may be disinclined to charge stark naked at our shifty and treacherous foe. Perhaps the fact that the crafty Kusari devils serve tea and arrange flowers with as much discipline as a regimental turn-out has put our chaps off.
Never fear. For in our strategy may we direct our plucky privates to risk their own privates in pursuance of the pummelling of the poxy Kusari populace and their be-sushi'd superiors..
A spiffing simulation programme for one's bleepy box has been provided by the brainy, yet dusty and withered, techno-boffins labouring under my direction. Officers should make use of it in their strategic planning for future operations.
I am certain that the programme is as relevant now as it was during the glorious campaigns of Old Sol which serve as the standard which Bretonian military greatness must always strive to emulate. I'm sure that technological advances such as Sonar echolocation, the Cruise missile, the Radio crystal oscillator, the Flip-flop circuit, Saha ionization, the Polygraph, Radar, the absorption refrigerator, sound film, the television, the wind tunnel, the aerosol, sliced bread, antibiotics, the electric dry shaver, the band-aid, insulin, Microwave RADAR, the jet engine, the ballpoint pen, ATM's, nuclear reactors,the computer, velcro, Nuclear weapons, transistors, the combined oral contraceptive pill, the fusion bomb, optic fibres, communcaications satellites, the laser, human spaceflight, computer networks, space stations, genetically modified organisms, DNA sequencing, digital imaging, magnetic resonance imaging, the artificial heart and Global Positioning Systems have had little impact on the fundamental strategical thinking that ensures victory.
An excellent training programme for developing a sense of the importance of industrial capacity and manpower in the face of war, to be sure. My thanks to Lord Commodore Brinkley for providing us with this.
You will be relieved to hear that I have completed both versions of the training program and achieved victory each time.
Stanley! How ball-bustingly brilliant to hear that even a crafty old master of the murdering set such as yourself is still up for a challenge! Have at them pixelated privates!
I too have mastered the simulation. I must admit to a certain degree of moist and pink-tipped pleasure at the injudicious use of mustard gas. The sprinkling of shrapnel even brought me to a moment of eagerness which I have not experienced since my days serving as Duke Henry Shirtlifter's aide de camp and spittoon.
Your mention of industrial capacity and manpower certainly gives food for thought. What a shame we cannot have the proles both working and breeding at the same time!
Perhaps prima nocta could be re-instituted and expanded. Forgive me for blowing my own horn, but the thought of a few hundred of my own loin's outpourings would be quite the challenge for our Nipponese nemesis.