I'm afraid that both you and your mother would have been worried for not hearing from me these past weeks. But my situation here has become a difficult one. I've been officially accused of things I did not do. We acted like soldiers. The charges are unjustified. They are in fact, under the circumstances of this conflict quite completely insane. In a war there are many moments for compassion and tender action. There are many moments for ruthless action, for what is often called ruthless. But many and many circumstances, the only clarity; seeing clearly what there is to be done and doing it directly, quickly, awake... looking at it.
I would trust you to tell your mother what you choose about this letter. As for the charges, I'm unconcerned. I'm beyond their lying morality. And so I'm beyond caring.
"Today captain Benjamin Willard came to Primus, sent by both LAF and BHG to kill me. I like him. He reminds me of myself when I was younger. I told my men that he is not to be harmed. I'll let him dwell on my vessel for now. He seems like he went through real hell to get here."
COLONEL KURTZ
"Where are you from Willard ?"
WILLARD
"I'm from Penssylvania, Planet Erie sir."
KURTZ
"Were you born there?"
WILLARD
"Yes, sir."
KURTZ
"Have you ever considered any real freedoms? Freedoms - from the opinions of others... Even the opinions of yourself. They say why..., Willard, why they wanted to terminate my command?"
WILLARD
"I was sent on a classified mission, sir."
KURTZ
"Ain't no longer classified, is it? What did they tell you?"
WILLARD
"They told me that you had gone totally insane and that your methods were unsound."
KURTZ
"Are my methods unsound?"
WILLARD
"I don't see any method at all, sir."
KURTZ
"I expected someone like you. What did you expect?"
Willard only shakes his head.
KURTZ
"Are you an assassin?"
WILLARD
"I'm a soldier."
KURTZ
" You're neither. You're an errand boy, sent by grocery clerks to collect a bill."
"Why, Willard? Why would a nice guy like you wanna kill a genius? You know that the man really likes you. He likes you, he really likes you. He's got something in mind for you. Aren't you curious about that? I'm curious, I'm very curious. You curious? There's something happening here, man. You know something, man, I know something that you don't know. That's right, jack. The man is clear in his mind, but his soul is mad. Oh yeah. He's dying, I think. He hates all this, he hates it! But... the man's... uh... he reads poetry out loud, alright? ... And a voice! A voice... He likes you because you're still alive. He's got plans for you. Nah, nah, I'm not going to help you, you're going to help him, man. You're going to help him.
I mean, what are they going to say, man, when he's gone, huh? Because he dies, when it dies, man, when it
dies, he dies. What are they going to say about him? What, are they going to say, he was a kind man, he was a wise man, he had plans, he had wisdom? Bullsh-t, man! Am I going to be the one, that's going to set them straight? Look at me: wrong! ... You!"
"I watched him sitting in his command chair. He was distant, transparent. Back on Primus, I thought that the minute I looked at him, I'd know what to do, but it didn't happen. I was in there with him on his ship for days, not under guard - I was free - but he knew I wasn't going anywhere. He knew more about what I was going to do than I did. If the generals and guildmasters could see what I saw, would they still want me to kill him? More than ever probably. And what would his people back home want if they ever learned just how far from them he'd really gone? He broke from them and then he broke from himself. I'd never seen a man so broken up and ripped apart..."
KURTZ
"I worry that my son might not understand what I've tried to be. And if I were to be killed, Willard, I would want someone to go to my home and tell my son everything. Everything I did, everything you saw... Because there is nothing I detest more than the stench of lies. And if you understand me, Willard, you'll do this for me."
Evening. Crew aboard Apocalypse Now is preparing for one more battle. Willard is in his quarters. Benjamin leaves his room war painted over his whole body. He carries his military knife. He moves through shadows. Moves without a sound.
WILLARD
"They were going to make me a major for this and I wasn't even in their f---ing army any more. Everybody wanted me to do it, him most of all. I felt like he was up there in his quarters, waiting for me to take the pain away. He just wanted to go out like a soldier, standing up, not like some poor, wasted, rag-as-ed renegade. Even this ship wanted him dead..."
Kurtz sits in a chair in his quarters, dictating to his audio recorder.
KURTZ
"They train young men to drop fire on people. But their commanders won't allow them to write f-ck on their ships because it's obscene!"
Colonel sees Willard entering his ready-room. Raises up, firmly on his feet and with his chin held high, pretending he did not notice him. Walks to the huge window. Stares at beautiful colors of Omicron Kappa's sun.
Willard approaches, waits few seconds which lasts for a whole eternity. Stabs Kurtz with a large knife. He keeps on doing it again... and again. And again.
Kurtz is dying, his final words:
"The horror. The horror..."
Willard finds Kurtz' manuscript where he has written. On the same page he finds self-destruction authorization code. He also reads:
"Destroy the ship. Exterminate them all."
Willard initiates self-destruction sequence of the vessel using link in colonel's ready-room. Leaves the room, drops his military knife. Runs to the escape pod and escapes from the ship. Kurtz's final words echoes in Willard's head.
"The horror. The horror..."
Captain Benjamin L. Willard stares from a cockpit at Apocalypse Now which is finally being swallowed by a huge explosions. The fires, carried by a powerful shock wave, spread out over miles and miles, burning, lasting... almost forever...