Fnordnet transmission, Node #23 Wrote:++ Source : Golden Apple Corps ++
++ Destination : Rheinland Military high command ++
++ Derivation : none ++
++ Encryption level : omega ++
++ Transmission begins ++
What we are says little,
does less,
means nothing.
Kallisti or Guten tag from the 'dancing star' cabal!
We are a Discordian 'entity'. We decided to leave Baffin and live among the stars. To do so, we started to build our new home around a year ago.
Our home is based on the Jinkusu design.
It will be fully ready in around a month.
This colony ship will be totally unarmed. We plan to wander in Sirius to allow our residents to consult their pineals in 'concentrated energy' systems.
We are therefore contacting the high command today to humbly request to be granted free passage in Rheinland sovereign space :
- We wouldn't Loiter in your space more than a week.
- We wouldn't help any criminals while in Rheinland space.
- We are well aware you are at war with Liberty. We wouldn't help any side nor give intel about what we see in Rheinland.
- We would contact an officer of the primary fleet if possible when we're about to enter in Rheinland space, to inform the high command of our presence.
As our vessel is unarmed, we are hoping you will grant us access to your space, since we won't be a menace for everyone.
We will form a mobile colony, mainly.
We will use as callsign [TAZ]Golden.Apple.Corps, as soon as our home is ready.
Please let us know your thoughts regarding that request.
23's!
++ And when men become free then mankind will be free ++
++ May you be free of The Curse of Greyface ++
++ May the Goddess put twinkles in your eyes ++
++ May you have the knowledge of a sage ++
++ and the wisdom of a child. Hail Eris. ++
++ End of transmission ++
FROM: Vizeadmiral Hans Putzkammer
TO: Golden Apple Corps
Guten abend meine freunde,
The military high command has received your request and your message is being reviewed as we speak.
Military High Command would like to ask for a small dossier on the bridge officers who will be at the helm of the Golden.Apple.Corps on its travels through Rheinland. A full name and short bio of each helm officer will be needed so that we may complete a background check on each.
Upon receiving and reviewing a list of the commanding officers, Military High Command will render judgment on your request.
Rheinland Military High Command Officer, Vizeadmiral Hans Putzkammer
Fnordnet transmission, Node #23 Wrote:++ Source : Golden Apple Corps ++
++ Destination : Vizeadmiral Hans Putzkammer ++
++ Derivation : none ++
++ Encryption level : omega ++
++ Transmission begins ++
What we are says little,
does less,
means nothing.
Kallisti, Vizeadmiral.
You may not be perfectly informed about our beliefs.
Please let us humbly enlighten you.
As you can read in Principia Discordia :
If you can't find the Polyfather, or having found him, don't want anything to do with him, you are still authorized to form your own POEE CABAL and do Priestly Things, using the Principia Discordia as a guide. Your Official Rank will be POEE CHAPLIN for the LEGION OF DYNAMIC DISCORD, which is exactly the same as a POEE PRIEST except that you don't have an Ordination Certificate. The words you are now reading are your ordination.
HOW TO BECOME A POEE CHAPLIN
1. Write the ERISIAN AFFIRMATION in five copies.
2. Sign and nose-print each copy.
3. Send one to the President of the United States.
4. Send one to
The California State Bureau of Furniture
and Bedding
1021 'D' Street, Sacramento CA 94814
5. Nail one to a telephone pole. Hide one. And burn the other. Then consult your pineal gland.
+++++
AN EPISKOPOS OF THE DISCORDIAN SOCIETY is one who prefers total autonomy, and creates his own Discordian sect as The Goddess directs him. He speaks for himself and for those that say that they like what he says.
++++
Some Episkoposes have a one-man cabal.
Some work together.
Some never do explain.
The 'dancing star' cabal is therefore a discordian entity/group/sect lead by five Epsikoposes minoris - which means they still regard the Episkopos Prime as shiny :
- 'KSC' Mord
As stated by his title, the pope known as 'Mord' is a Keeper of the sacred chao, an honorary position given to wise Discordians.
Mord is quite aged. He assiduously meditated in the sacred sanctum during his youth, reaching the primal state known as 'the fifth door'.
Lately, he worked on a bar known as 'Sin's after hours'.
For reason known by him only, he decided to leave Baffin a few months ago.
He agreed to join the cabal and he is currently busy setting up the plans of 'exodus 23'.
- Beatrice 'Betty' Grindlebone
Miss Grindlebone is pretty much a free spirit.
Born in Baffin, she decided to leave everything to work as a private freelancer in Taus and Bretonia.
Well... We don't know all the story, but it seems she had some troubles there, having to pay a lot of debts. She only returned to the temple a few years ago.
Unfortunately, it seems there is a lot we don't know about her past.
Her view of things however proved itself to be quite useful.
Ahem... I will personally add there is currently a pot in the cabal regarding who will be able to court her succesfully. Said pot started to be quite big.
- Camden Benares
The pope Benares is the former Episkopos of the 'Camp Meeker Cabal'.
He can be rather exuberant and is largelly know in Baffin for his infamous yet hilarious Chao Magic initiation sessions.
That fine man spent all his life in the temple.
He left Baffin for the first time a year ago. He was chosen by the cabal to oversee the construction of the Golden Apple Corps.
- Dr. Mordecai Malignatus
The venerable doctor Malignatus is the most senior member of our cabal.
He dedicated his life to learn abstract ethics, Epistemology, esoterism and applied magick.
It wasn't easy to decide him to leave Baffin and his infamously vast private library.
He finally agreed when he realized he would certainly be able to meet savants and scholars during our travels.
In the cabal, he works as the elder voice, summarizing the dilemma and proposing a course of action.
- Clementina Galbraith
The commander Galbraith served on the Emperor Joshua Norton (EJN) during twenty three years.
She showed since her youth remarkable abilities that allowed her to join that venerable vessel's crew when she was fourteen.
Since then, she rapidly became indispensable to the actual commander of the EJN.
Actually, Miss Galbraith is the second in command. She decided to leave the EJN as she never left Baffin and became a bit bored of the humdrum in the EJN.
The commander is currently still working on that venerable Jinkusu. She will be released of her duty as soon as our home is fully operational.
She is not per se an Episkopos, as she doesn't have a mystical guiding role. She however has her say in the cabal decisions, being the commanding officer of our new home.
There is currently 2355,5 members in the cabal.
For administrative reasons, Fnordnettes and AI's are equal to 1.5 primates.
We hope those informations are what you were looking for, dear Mr. Putzkammer.
If Rheinland Military needs more pieces of information, don't hesitate to ask.
We will humbly wait for the results of your deliberations.
23's.
++ And when men become free then mankind will be free ++
++ May you be free of The Curse of Greyface ++
++ May the Goddess put twinkles in your eyes ++
++ May you have the knowledge of a sage ++
++ and the wisdom of a child. Hail Eris. ++
++ End of transmission ++
FROM: Vizeadmiral Hans Putzkammer
TO: Golden Apple Corps
Guten abend meine freunde,
The military high command has reviewed and granted your request to enter Rheinland core space upon the your agreence with the following conditions:
The Rheinland Military respectfully asks that you maintain a 5k distance from all populated planets in Rheinland to avoid any civilian casualties on the case of an emergency.
The Rheinland Military asks that you maintain a 1k distance from all trade-lanes when not using them to avoid traffic jams and accidental damage to lanes.
The Rheinland Military requires you to have at least one military or police escort present when moving your ship anywhere inside Rheinland.
If an escort is not present and you are outside of Rheinland wishing to enter Rheinlandic space, you will not able able to do so until you have an escort.
If inside Rheinland space and no escort is present, you are allowed to move your ship up to 5k from the original departing point of the escort for station-keeping. Any further deviation from the original point will be considered a violation of Rheinland law unless your, or someone else's life is in danger (other then parties considered criminal inside Rheinland by the Rheinland state) and you are required to move in order to save this life. If this is the case, you will need to be able to defend yourself form charges in a Rheinland court of law.
You will not in any way whatsoever give any aid to forces Rheinland considers unlawful while inside Rheinland space.
As the Military may be unable to defend your ship as a moment's notice, and seeing as a ship of such size may be used as an improvised weapon if boarded or taken control of, Rheinland REQUIRES that you mount basic defensive weaponry on your ship. The one allowed/required weapon type is Solaris anti snub-craft batteries.
If these seven conditions are agreed upon, Rheinland grants your ship unlimited access to all unrestricted space in Rheinland for up to 90 days at a time.
Rheinland Military High Command Officer, Vizeadmiral Hans Putzkammer
Fnordnet transmission, Node #23 Wrote:++ Source : Golden Apple Corps ++
++ Destination : Vizeadmiral Hans Putzkammer ++
++ Derivation : none ++
++ Encryption level : omega ++
++ Transmission begins ++
What we are says little,
does less,
means nothing.
Dear Vizeadmiral Putzkammer.
The Episkopos Minoris of our cabal had quite long talks about the terms of the agreement you kindly sent to us.
We totally understand your will to protect Rheinland citizens.
A 'Jinkusu' class vessel can be dangerous for the others vessels navigating nearby. We wouldn't want to harm anyone, thus we agree on the Points 1. and 2.
We would be grateful to being escorted by Rheinland Military forces while we are in Rheinland and we realize your forces would have to know where a vessel of that size is located. You have our agreement on the points 3., 4. and 5.
We already stated in our first communication we wouldn't help any criminal organizations inside your space. Point 6. is agreed on.
The point 7. is however bothering us.
The consensus in the cabal is to live in a ship lacking of any offensive hull mounted weaponry.
The 'Jinkusu' became a symbol, but was however often used as a tool of war, leading many to fear that vessel and its might. We refuse to carry that symbol of fear in our travels.
Mankind left Sol for a reason, a reason that is often forgotten or disregarded, sadly.
To balance the reputation of that vessel while living with our ideals, and since our cabal had so many members we couldn't live together in any other ship, we decided to have this vessel unarmed.
Your concerns about a potential capture of our home are understandable.
However, please let us try to convince you this had little chance to happen.
- The docks of our home will harbor a few escort fighters - if Rheinland allows us to, along with the supply freighters and transporters needed to give our home its autonomy.
- We will be more than 2300 persons on board. Let us assure you all the women and men able to fight would do so if someone tries to violate and capture their home. We are working since a while on defense training and we will have a militia formed by all the members of the cabal able to fight. We will also have a police force to enforce reasonable order inside our home. Such a numerous defense force, along with the internal defensive means we are planning to setup would make the capture of our vessel extremely difficult for the offender, costing him a lot of resources and time.
- Dear Vizeadmiral, you may be aware the design patterns of the 'Jinkusu' are considered as vital by the Zoner community. If the situation is so critical someone would be able to capture a vessel of that class - even unarmed -, we would make sure nothing remains from it by overcharging the cores of the vessel.
- The last but not least, TAZ neutral diplomatic stance prevents any group with enough resources to do such a harsh move. We actually cannot recall any precedence of that hypothetic case.
We are thus humbly asking you to drop the point 7.
The set up of anti fighter weaponry wouldn't help much against a capture attempt in our eyes, anyway.
We are hoping you will agree the risk here is inexistent.
If you are concerned about our safety, please remember we already accepted the risk to live in an unarmed vessel.
The Episkoposes are aware they are asking a lot to the Federal Republic of Rheinland.
If you need insurances, we could host a team of tactical and military assessment officers, so that Rheinland Military ensures we have the means and the will to repel any capture attempt before you take a final decision.
If you have another idea, please do tell us.
If the Point 7. is categorical and non negotiable, we will sadly drop that request and apology for wasting your time in these difficult times.
With the 'Dancing star' cabal Episkoposes Minoris thanks,
we will humbly wait your response.
23's.
++ And when men become free then mankind will be free ++
++ May you be free of The Curse of Greyface ++
++ May the Goddess put twinkles in your eyes ++
++ May you have the knowledge of a sage ++
++ and the wisdom of a child. Hail Eris. ++
++ End of transmission ++
[font=Verdana][color=#33CC00]SUBMITTER: [color=#FFCC00]Hauptmann Heinrich Kraus, Rheinland Military. [color=#33CC00]RECIPIENT: [color=#FFCC00]"Golden Apple Corps" [color=#33CC00]SUBJECT: [color=#FFCC00]Airspace Clearence
[color=#FFCC00]
To whom it may concern,
After deep consideration by myself and the other officials of our honorable Republic of Rheinland, we have deemed your entry into Rheinland space acceptable. Barring article seven of our contract, there is no discrepancy in our views as to what your stay will entail. The Zoners have a longstanding reputation for fairness and honesty. That's certainly not something I will turn my nose up to and my superiors and constituents feel the same. However, as a suggestion, I hope you will bring personal defense for your "home". I'm not giving you the green light to bring an armada, but some escorts wouldn't be the worst idea in the event we are unable to render immediate assistance. I am certain I do not need to explain the ramifications should your "home" be overtaken by the many radical and extremist groups that, much to our dismay, also call Rheinland home. With that in mind, we welcome you to Rheinland.
I do ask one personal request though. I've heard much about these pineal amulets that are sacred to those of your order. I would like one for my own research. Consider it a token of our agreement and mutual respect.
Signed,
Hauptmann Heinrich Kraus,
Einsatzleiter des Rheinland Militärs.
Fnordnet transmission, Node #23 Wrote:++ Source : Golden Apple Corps ++
++ Destination : Hauptmann Heinrich Kraus ++
++ Derivation : none ++
++ Encryption level : omega ++
++ Transmission begins ++
What we are says little,
does less,
means nothing.
Kallisti, Mr. Kraus.
Please accept our apologies for the lateness of this answer.
The cabal would like to thank the Federal Republic of Rheinland to allow us to enter in its controlled space.
Rest assured we won't allow anyone to turn our home into a warship.
As for the escorts, we will rely on the wings we will have on board. TAZ vessels shall also give a hand when they can.
Nothing bigger than a gunship, however.
We will contact Rheinland Military High Command again on this node to confirm some informations regarding our home, as soon as the Golden Apple Corps will be fully operational.
Now, regarding your request, dear Mr. Kraus :
We must say we are quite surprised.
To our knowledge, only Erisians are interested to study esoteric energies.
The Geode is known to gather together such energies. That is why our pineal amulets or 'Trinkets' are made using the Geode's crystal.
May we humbly ask what your personnal researches are about?
If what interests you is their appearance, we could ask to one of the numerous pineal crafters to make one specifically for you.
That one would be quite different from the trinkets our trader use to ship to Omicrons or Sigmas.
Of course, we would need some intel regarding your tastes first, such which colors you would prefer, which shape... etc.
Please let us know.
23's.
++ And when men become free then mankind will be free ++
++ May you be free of The Curse of Greyface ++
++ May the Goddess put twinkles in your eyes ++
++ May you have the knowledge of a sage ++
++ and the wisdom of a child. Hail Eris. ++
++ End of transmission ++