To: All TAZ
Comm ID: E-Prime
Sorry for the delays, Flockies. I didn't realize I still had the keys to this channel. Must have to do with my Temple responsibilities...
Pope Brettonius, your efforts in protecting the Temple are appreciated. Mr. Hawk is hereby banned from Baffin.
Mr. John Phillips, your request made me realize that our Pentabarf was lacking a list of "approved contractors". Congratulations, John. You're the first besides our friends the Mandalorians to receive the honor. Do not abuse it. Nearly all our "sanctions" against these cabbages is limited to Baffin itself, unless noted otherwise.
Watch the gates, my Brethren and Sistren, and Eris will watch over us.
Malaclypse
for the TAZ
To: Templars
Freeport 1 Defense vessels, bearing [FP1] tags, are to be treated as "Acolytes", and may dock at the Pentahouse.
/buttcheek imprimatur/
Malaclypse
To: Jack.The.Slapper/Eat.At.Joe
CC: All TAZ
Congrats, Slapper!!
You threatened our whole system, disobeyed one of our guards and trespassed on Pueblo Bonita. Congratulations on making the Pentabarf. Apparently my good will of forgiving you once before was mistaken judgement. You're the first to make it twice.
Oh...and please do bring friends. I enjoy mass killings! Your escape pods will be directed towards our sun. Hearing you scream will be fun.
-John Holliday
Administrator
-= From the Kiva =-
![[Image: chaospin.gif]](http://fusionanomaly.net/chaospin.gif)
Gentlefolk and Popish types,
I have
received a request for docking rights from an old friend, Independent Zoner,
and part-time Discordian and houseguest.
If there are no objections, I would like Brother Lev Shestov added to our list of "Authorized Guests".
He does have good taste in potables and huffables.
Kallisti!
Mal
From: Doc's Office
I see no reason why Brother Shestov can't be added. I've yet to meet the man myself but um, I do believe we can make the time. Do let him know that he's been added.
-Doc
*** To: All Popes and Momes Comm ID: Clara Moreau ***
Kallisti mes amis,
I go to bring refugees to safety on Fujisawa, but 2 silly men attacked us. Les choux crétins!
[TAZ]Chant.de.baleine: Clara: What is problem monsieur?
Ghostknife: You are affiliated with the TAZ
[TAZ]Chant.de.baleine: Clara: Oui
Ghostknife: TAZ are affiliated with Outcast, the slave traders.
[TAZ]Chant.de.baleine: Clara: ha, we are not monsieur
Bimbo: has he paid?
Bimbo et Ghostknife, they say I am a slaver and deal the cardamine, then they shoot me et my refugee friends? Je ne prends pas! Quoi!? Ce n'est pas vrai! It is not true at all!
*opens a bottle of wine, visibly shaking*
I give them my purse and they leave - so that they would not harm any more refugees with their guns.
Amusé, Je ne suis pas!
Les vignt-trois mes amis.... May Eris spit on these empty-headed sons of a silly person!
*** with some grandiose huffing and puffing, the line is disconnected ***
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
*** The line reconnects briefly ***
Aussi, one of the refugees offers to pay for their enemas. 5 millions on each.
*** somewhat calm now, she disconnects the line again ***
Comm ID: Malaclypse, [TAZ]Raffle.Prize
Sigh.. Eris is having a fit...
I had our new giveway gunboat out for a spin, and was about to transfer some codies when a Lane Hacker snubby squawking "Cyrax" approached the Temple, after a very clear warning to stand off.
The Cabbage eluded my CD's, and proceeded to dock at our Sacred Temple, just as the [TAZ]PolyHauler was undocking to assist with the transfer.
He undocked almost immediately, spewing his disdain for our System Laws.. and acting like the Greyface he obviously was.
Eris demands retribution in the form of a nice warm high colonic.
Enema'd, Bountied, and banned from Baffin until his Pineal grows a few inches.
Doc, see that he makes the list in nice bold letters, please.
Mal.
Comm ID: [TAZ]Doc.Holliday
To: Malaclypse; All TAZ
Per your request, Mal, Cyrax was Penterbarfed. My only wish was that you saw exactly what kind of ship he was flying. Regardless, bountied, enema'd and banned. His pineal? Well, those pineals under cardi seem to have issues.
-Doc
To: All TAZ
Cc: "Independant Contractors"
Cc: Mandalorian Mercenaries
From: Malaclypse, [TAZ]Chapel.Perilous
Sigh.. I guess the Party is truly over now...
Date of Incident with links if available.: Today, approx. 1500 hrs. (Logs available if needed.)
Name: Void.Crystal
Ship: Aquilon
Reason: Violation of 'Barf the Fifth, Trespassing, Theft of Temple property. (The above-mentioned Aquilon.)
Punishment: Banned and bountied, 4 each "Enemas" at 25 Million per, total of 100 Million.
This "Zoner" actually agreed to his Ban. I feel it only polite to accomodate him.
Hail Eris!, and prepare the coleslaw dressing.
Mal
To: Mal
From: Doc
Per your request, Void.Crystal was added to the Penterbarf. I will be letting the Mandalorians know about this as I'm sure $25 million will wake them up!
-Doc