Evangeline Anastasia McDowell

[Bazza]

Entry#: 100
Date: 17 - 06 - 818 AS @ 21:53 SUT
Title: Untitled.

Today marks the fifth day in a row I've had less than an hours' sleep. I don't even want to look at myself in a mirror lest I have a heart attack caused by my own appearance. Every time I close my eyes... I repeat the minutes before the blackout in my head over and over. And every time I reach the end of my memory, I'm fully awake again. I've been lying wide awake with Misaka in my arms every night now. Even her warm embrace does nothing to help.

I told Misaka and the girls I had some kind of viral infection, probably whatever Sakura had, and that I'd get better soon. How long can I keep this up?

I flew out to Freeport 1 in Omega-3 yesterday. I found the guy who'd asked me out. He ended up being quite late to the event, though, in his defence, he did make the effort to show up. I tried to let him down as softly as possible. I hope he doesn't feel bad, because I do.

And now I'm back on board the Alsatia docked to the Berlin orbital docking ring again.

Sooner or later the Military is going to find me. I've got one of their fighter craft captive, I'm probably wanted for treason after shooting the Vizeadmiral, and the cargo pods I stole earlier are likely being traced as I type this up.

I'm taking the ship and getting out of Rheinland while I still have a chance. I can't go to Kreuzberg; I'll be found in days. I'm getting out of here and taking my stalker come babysitter Evelyn DeRosa with me.

First order of business is getting Jones back to her own people. She's been with me for over a week now, and although I enjoy her company, I can't keep her forever. Back to Dawson Base she goes.

I don't want to be in the Military. I don't want to be in Rheinland at all. I just want.... to go back to the way things were, before any of this ever happened. Before I met Felicia... before I met Gunther... before I met Katrina in Texas. It seems so long ago now...

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